Use the Comment section below to write up your cunting nomination.
The site admins will periodically review the nominations and will either:
✔️ schedule it to be published immediately or at a later date, OR
❌ bin it for any number of reasons
Either way, your nomination will disappear from this page.
That’s how you’ll know it’s been reviewed, so don’t ask.
If you want your cunting nomination published, follow the fucking rules:
[1] Whenever possible include a link to a recognised news source or risk 🗑️.
[2] Unsubstantiated allegations against living people or institutions results in 🗑️.
[3] Too short (less than 5 lines) or too long (more than 50 lines) qualifies it for 🗑️.
[4] Pay attention to grammar, spelling, punctuation, spacing. Unreadable equals 🗑️.
[5] Do not add comments to nominations unless specifically requested by an admin.
[6] Stop using the Nominations page to ask for things not to be nominated. Use the Contact Us page. That’s what it’s there for, otherwise 🗑️
Which leads us to a most important rule:
Respond appropriately to an admin comment within 2 days or guess what happens.
That’s right. It goes in the 🗑️.
LET’S GET CUNTING!
I`d like to nominate LONDONERS.
Controversial? Not really …
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-68959313
… And thus follows a message to ALL cunters on this site: Don`t even think about nominating Sadiq Khan ever again, because the cunt was voted in for another term: By YOU.
You get what you deserve.
Sam, why lots of love write some more if you want it publishing. Ta C.A.
3
OK, Admin.
Please append …
If you all wanted this cunt out of office then why didn`t you vote the fucker out? I quote from the linked piece …
“His record third mayoral victory came after the threat of a Tory surge in the suburbs simply evaporated. Mr Khan’s winning margin was 275,000 votes and his 44% share equalled what he achieved in 2016.”
Nothing fucking changes.
1
This is a nomination to UN-Cunt The Eurovision Song Contest.
Bear with me.
I give you Windows95Man, from Finland …
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tf1NS1vEhSg&t=82s
Come ON, cunters! Rejoice! Eat THAT, rug-kissers!
Plus, any Yanks reading this? You don’t even come come close with your entertainments – and you`ve got Trump.
1
Hello, Admin.
Please append to above (if this nom is also on the short side) …
OK, we all know it`s a bum-fest celebrating the culture of some of the most depraved deviants in society; but it`s a fucking good laugh isn`t it? – especially the `voting` at the end which is longer than the actual `contest` and has nothing to do with the `songs` spewed out beforehand.
0
I endorse this nom with the proviso it is not a knock to Windows 95. The good old Blue Screen of Death still runs our railways and other mission critical parts of our infrastructure, the theory being that all the bugs have been ironed out of it now.
4
The king has cancer. Not just “has” cancer. Is “stricken” with it.
Allegedly.
His cancer is infintely more important than your pleb cancer and don’t you forget it.
Jug-ears’ll have access to the very best oncologists in the world and everyone else who actually has to pay for the disaster that is the NHS…well, their cancer is terrifying because of chınkyflu and overcrowding, waiting lists are as long as a siphonophore.
The fawning press goes overboard with their asskissery of this hypocritical, WEF-stooge, über-rich sponger.
“Cancer-stricken king might not be able to perform his royal duties”
His duties? Going on holiday and waving at simpletons from a safe distance.
Fuck him and his whole useless, grasping family of chinless inbreds.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-68240096
2
Arse Worms
Ie instantly mundane expressions akin to “ear worms” that get up my arse. They originate out of the brain drool of Business Speak, TV Speak, Politics Speak and Academic Speak. They knot and gender within themselves then become mutually infectious and spread the virus “across the Piece”.
“Across the Piece” has been around for several decades now and is generally considered to have been first uttered by Ed Balls and thus may be genuinely considered “a load of Balls”. As with anything Balls says, the usage in his hands is a “Balls Up”, a mangling of the old alpine favourite “on the piste”(check your Carry On joke book). Alas it has gone virus critical in these fervid pre-election times and caused the old favourite “across the board” to vomit and die on a trolley after a three day wait in a corridor in A&E. Out of the mouth of a political hack “we have been disappointed across the piece” means we have been stitched up by everybody, Mullered and done up like kippers in our traditional heartlands and by new voters.
“The right thing to do”. A Sunac favourite and hopefully soon to be forgotten, every decision made by the Gov that defies logic is presented because “it is the right thing to do” and challenges the presenter or interviewer to appear a meanie and respond with “oh no it isn’t” but alas they never do. A shabby debating trick that should be accompanied by a whitened tombstone smile to take the win.
“Take the Win”. An expression that has come across from American Sports meaning to accept your opponents loss and ignore the controversy surrounding it. We had Biden urging Netanyahu not to blow the remaining third of Gaza to fuck and be satisfied with that. “Take the win Bibi baby”. We all know Benjamin Bibi Netanyahu’s response to that. The problem being that Hamas will not “Take the Loss”.
2
Here is a BBC link that links the phrase directly to Sunac
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/science-environment-63330171
0
Mothin Ali; Green Party Councillor for Gaza
Time was when local elections were about ‘bread and butter’ issues of import to residents and council tax payers; schools and housing, bin collections, litter, stuff like that.
Not so much these days, at least if the example of a certain Mothin ‘The Mouth’ Ali is anything to go by. After winning a seat on the council in Leeds, the Green Goblin went off on one, yelling ‘Alluah Akbar’ and gobbing off about his win being ‘a victory for Palestine, a victory for Gaza’ etc and so forth. I’m sure that will be reassuring for those of his constituents concerned about potholes and keeping the library open.
Islamification. Coming soon to a local authority caliphate near you.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13384283/Moment-Green-Party-councillor-shouts-Allahu-Akbar-elected-Leeds-declares-victory-win-people-Gaza.html
4
I`d like to cunt ISOHEDRA.
(It`s a long shot, but I`m guessing this hasn`t been cunted before).
But I`m not talking about any old three-dimensional polyhedral object existing in what we perceive as spacetime; no, I`m nominating this …
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-lincolnshire-68935157
Nobody, thus far, has been able to figure out what it `s purpose was.
So now it`s OUR turn, cunters! You know what’s coming, don’t you: What the fuck was this thing used for? – ADMINS – prize please for best thought?
My guess? Simple. Don`t overthink it.
It was a Roman wanking device.
0
Admins.
Please allow this addenda to the above nom.
“Further, if I were that inclined, professor Alice Roberts would be my `inspiration`”.
Vixen.
1
RISHI HAS A PLAN
Is this fucking useless cunt for real? Hard on the heels of the Tories’ drubbing in the local elections, here’s the Torygraph giving a platform to Shortarse himself in a pitiful attempt to stave off complete annihilation at the next General Election.
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/politics/2024/05/03/the-choice-is-clear-we-have-a-plan-and-it-is-working/
Shorty says he has a plan. I’ll save cunters the trouble and cost of surmounting the paywall erected by the billionaire twins who own this rag, especially as they’re in the process of selling out to a bunch of smelly, sheep’s eyeball munching oilw*gs. Instead, here is the 6-point plan in summary:
1. To provide a red carpet welcome for all dinghy arrivals. Slot machines will be installed along the south coast where, for a small fee, all undocumented males will be able to purchase British citizenship, a passport and free access to accommodation, healthcare, public services and pension rights for life.
2. To punish aspiration, self-reliance and success by taxing the indigenous population to death.
3. To impoverish the population by pandering to the ecomentals and forcing EVs and heat pumps on people who don’t want them and can’t afford them.
4. To turn the country over to Islamomarxist mob rule.
5. To provide further prohibition business opportunities for organised crime by following up the cigarette ban with bans on vaping, alcohol, junk food, non-Halal meat and anything else we can think of that people enjoy.
6. To lose the next election by a landslide, fuck off to Silicon Valley and hand the UK over to the Labour Party to finish the job of destroying Britain’s history, heritage, culture and economy.
So that’s the Plan. Or have I missed anything?
0