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If you break this rule, you may be moderated indefinitely or possibly banned.
NOW LET’S GET CUNTING!
The Perfect Shark Shot.
“I knew something was different because the sharks were on the surface,” says Tayane Dalazen, a 37-year old Brazilian lawyer and social media personality.
“There were a lot of them,” she says. “Later, I discovered [the tour organisers] were feeding the sharks so that they would interact with the tourists.”
Dalazen, from Sao Paulo, was on a shark-diving trip on the Brazilian coast in April when she suddenly felt “strong pressure” on her leg.
“When the shark bit me, the pain was very strong,” she says. “I stayed calm because I knew I couldn’t fight the animal.”
Incidents of sharks biting humans are incredibly rare, but at least three influencers have been bitten by the animals in less than a year. Scientists say they’re increasingly concerned about the rise in social media videos showing people swimming too close to sharks, touching or even riding them.
“I’m seeing these videos every single week now and it’s way more than it ever used to be,” says shark scientist Kristian Parton, who also hosts the ‘Shark Bytes’ YouTube channel. “We’re going to see people ending up in really serious incidents with sharks.”
In July, a fishing influencer almost lost his leg after being attacked by a reef shark whilst spearfishing. In December, a Chinese content creator was bitten in the Maldives. Both incidents were caught on camera.
What the fuck is wrong with these idiots?
The fantastic social media has a lot to answer for.
I am however a keen advocate of Natural Selection.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c5yvrn7rpqpo
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The Daily Express
Belive me this cunting is more in sorrow than anger. I admired the Express for being so pro leave in the EU debate – their support was non-flinching, unlike the Mail and the red top tabloids, bought off by the poncey left, BUT. prior to that they kept a shrine going for that old slapper Diana Spencer for years after her “accident” and now they are the offocial fanzine for Harry Hewitt and his actress wife – every day there is yet another breathless story “Harry’s fury as Meghan farts in bed – this will end their Hollywood dream” and that old bollocks.
In addition to goig up to £2.10 a day (a year ago it was less than £1.50 – I think £1.40, you now have to pay for most of their content and what is free is shit. Take this for example from Royal Czech Mail. A few days ago they “warned” againt using coloured envelopes for birthday cards and the like, now today some even more stating the bleeding obvious:
https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/2237980/royal-mail-issues-notice-writing
This is news?. The silly cunts take over a week to deliver a letter from EC1 to North West London , and that is even if the address is printed black on white:
https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/2237980/royal-mail-issues-notice-writing
The Czech Mail deserve a cunting – I will leave that for somebody else, but the poor old Express – John Junor would be turning in his grave.
4
The National Travellers Action Group.
“The number of unauthorised Gypsy and traveller sites is on the rise, with developments often carried out over Bank Holiday weekends.
Since April, sites in Hertfordshire, Essex, Cambridgeshire, Bedfordshire and elsewhere have been transformed, prompting legal battles and local dismay”..
Dismay,aye reckon so.
“Cliff Codona, who founded and chairs the National Travellers’ Action Group, says the planning system is like a “big dagger in their back” for travellers, leaving them no option but to “break the law”.
When Codona moved on to what has become his family’s caravan site, just outside Elm, near Wisbech, Cambridgeshire, in 2020, he did not have planning permission.
“We pulled down on a Friday evening when we knew the council was all closed up and we just took it for granted that this is how things get done,” he recalls.
“As soon as they know you’re a Gypsy,” he says, a planning application is “stopped – dead in its tracks”.
It is a fucking shame.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cpq3w8q0j9go
There must be an answer to this?
What could it be?
3
Skoda.
Or Shkoda, if you prefer.
https://youtu.be/IxHWl3S-rgI?si=QqdnE5-AdglRN97A
I can’t get my fucking breath. Do these advertising cunts really think that an ad pronouncing Skoda as Shkoda is somehow going to make it more desirable?
What are the management thinking?
This feels like a Bud Lite moment.
Fuck me, Skoda. Pull the ad, blame the office junior for getting carried away but don’t change the name.
It’s a car, not an IKEA Asbo!
3
A Home Office pamphlet for criminals.
“Asylum seekers have been told that rape, sexual harassment and domestic abuse are illegal in the UK, in guidance for new arrivals published by the Home Office.
A nine-page online booklet covers respect in public, sex and consent, and gender equality, with guidance on how UK laws and customs may be different from their home countries.”
The booklet sets out how asylum seekers must understand UK law, because the consequences of breaking the law mean “you could get in trouble with the police, lose your asylum support, or it could affect your asylum claim.”
A section on gender, external explains that women in the UK have equal rights to men, and do not need the permission from a husband, father, brother or any other man to do things like work, study, travel, or make decisions.
Troubling some might say,locking the stable door after the horse has emigrated to a remote Scottish island perhaps..
Fortunately for anyone concerned that importing savage vermin might cause some difficulties one of our betters is on hand to calm things down..
“Jacqueline McKenzie, head of immigration and asylum law at Leigh Day, told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme that the material from the Home Office is “problematic, it’s inflammatory but done well it could be useful”.
“Something that could be quite good if done well and not done in a patronising way could be useful, but I’m very suspicious at the fact that the government has put this in the public domain.”
Have we really sunk so low as to produce expensive literature to try to stem a tide of ethnic sexuâl assault ?
So it seems.
Steaming Cunts for Oven.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ceqe3y34e9eo
6
I would like to second this cunting, purely for the reason that the fuckwits in government who proudly produced this pointless pamphlet saw fit to reveal it in… English.
Why English? None of the dinghy filth can read and can only speak pidgin English at best. Let alone understand the point the pamphlet is trying to make.
Our money would be better wasted printing this in Urdu, Arabic and whatever grunts, clicks and squeaks pass for languages in Africa.
0
Mydentist, Bridlington.
Gail Drake developed a niggling toothache and rang Mydentist for an appointment. They told her she had to book online.
Gail explained she was registered as blind, but was repeatedly told she needed to book online.
When she asked to speak to the practice manager, she was told to write or email.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/czxq2j51zg1o
Now, I get Mydentist is probably one of a number who has spotted a gap in the market. My NHS dentist dumped me during Covid after they were bought out by a bunch of… I’ll let you guess. The same probably happened to Gail.
That’s no excuse for the way a person who has been partially sighted since birth, and has recently developed fast growing cataracts, or indeed anyone in pain, should be treated.
I’ve sympathy for Gail. I’m developing cataracts and some days it’s like looking through a shifting fog towards a bright light.
Anyway the BBC contacted these cunts who offered her a same day appointment, with a Harley Street dental surgeon, I hope, because I wouldn’t trust my teeth to this bunch of chancers.
Incidentally, I find that this article calling Gail by Drake, as if she were a criminal extremely offensive. Get rid of proof readers at your peril, media cunts.
0
BUDGIES
… are psychopathic CUNTS.
Budgies are often underestimated as pets, but they are arguably some of the most dangerous animals in the world. Beneath their innocent appearance lies a terrifying combination of speed, intelligence and unpredictable behaviour. A budgie can go from calmly sitting in its cage chirping to its refection in a tiny mirror to causing absolute chaos in a matter of seconds, leaving you wondering what went wrong.
One of the biggest dangers of owning a budgie is its ability to attack without warning. Their viciously sharp beaks can deliver surprisingly painful bites, especially when they feel threatened or simply decide that they do not like the look of someone’s finger. They are also remarkably agile, meaning that escaping budgies can be extremely difficult to catch once they have decided to explore the highest bits of the house.
But perhaps the most frightening thing about budgies, however, is their psychological warfare. They can make loud noises at completely unreasonable times and then behave as though nothing happened. Their combination of chaos, attitude and total lack of remorse makes them a serious threat to household peace. And they shit everywhere.
For these reasons, budgies deserve being cunted as one of the world’s most dangerous pets. While they may be small, their confidence is enormous, their beaks are formidable, and their sociopathic capacity for causing trouble appears limitless. Anyone brave enough to own one should approach the responsibility with extreme caution — and preferably a large bucket of Trill®*.
🐦
*Other seeds are available.
1