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NOW LET’S GET CUNTING!
Get ready guys and gals for airlines to introduce compulsory wearing of seat belts at all times, no walking up and down the aisle during a flight and being escorted in a protective suit to go to the toilet……just in case.
Sounds unlikely or even bonkers?
Well, if enough of these compo chasing cunts win these erroneous cases then it could happen for fear of the airlines being sued….for a natural phenomenon- an ‘act of god’; if you like
This old cunt is trying to sue an airline for turbulence….yup- as if it was something an airline would be in control of!
Read the story (below) this compo cunts husband didn’t even die as a result of this turbulence throwing him around- he died of a heart attack shitting himself when it started.
I hope this gets thrown out of court…..and no doubt the no win no fee lawyer gets told to fuck off forever. Don’t get me wrong, I have no interest in airlines, but I do have an interest in freedom and lessening red tape, but cases like this..if won, will result in airlines introducing some, if not all the suggested outcomes I made at the beginning of this cunting. It’s because of people like this, we now have ‘warning contents may be hot’ on coffee cups. You think…we don’t need that, then you read a story like this and businesses then start to cover their arses..just in case.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cqlwrpey1epo
4
The Raycist Conspiracy at the Swimming Pool.
“England’s National Child Mortality Database found that black children were over three times more at risk of drowning as white children between 2019 and 2025. Putting ethnicity aside, risk was also more than twice as high for children living in the most deprived areas compared with the least deprived.”
The horror.
“Over Britain’s record-breaking hot summer, we’ve seen a number of tragic deaths in lakes, rivers, and at sea, all of which will contribute to the UK’s annual total of drownings. There’s no official data yet for 2026, but in previous years we’ve seen black children and adults over-represented in the drowning figures”
Nature must be a racíst cunt eh?
“For Kevin Hylton, emeritus professor of equality and diversity in sport at Leeds Beckett University, that started with his childhood. “I grew up in a working-class Caribbean family where swimming wasn’t a thing that was done,” he says. “We had almost zero leisure as a family together. It was done through school.”
What can be done in the face of discriminatory H²0?
Expect a govt enquiry soon.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx27vxkpdz1o
2
The Notting Hill Fucking Carnival.
Or more precisely, the BBC and the Met’s depiction of this annual blight on society.
It’s bank holiday Monday as I write and the BBC are covering the stabfest ‘Live’ on their shitty website.
Superlative bullshit abounds. With gems like ‘Carnival links me to my identity’
And my absolute favourite ‘The carnival is a “teaching tool” that helps younger generations’.
In which case, perhaps the carnival could teach the Met fatso’s some basic mathematics.
At Monday lunchtime, the Met claimed they had made 169 arrests on the Sunday.
Later in the afternoon that figure had been changed to 243.
An easy mistake to make, I guess, when most of the 7000 officers drafted in at tax payers expense are dancing with big black mama’s and taking the knee every five minutes.
Still, it’s nice to hear from the Met that it had been “overwhelmingly positive and celebratory”.
Yeah, right.
Heaven forbid that the public should be told what a horrible crime ridden free for all it really is.
Dear me, no.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cqly8ezkm727t
3
Cures For Hiccups…
…are a Cunt
NONE of them fucking work. NONE.
Hold your breath? Tried. Tried strangling myself, suffocating head in pillow, it doesn’t work.
Drink a cold drink? Took a gulp of the heavily iced vodka and orange that gave me the cunts in the first place, didn’t work.
Pull your knees to your chest? Dislodges a mega fart but doesn’t cure the hiccunts.
I know one thing that’ll work, so I’m off to watch an ISIS instruction video.
2
https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-get-rid-of-hiccups
0
The BBC and its “back to work blues” advice.
“The alarm wakes you with a shock, the summer holiday is over and it’s time to face that inbox full of unread emails.
This time last week, life was very different. You enjoyed late nights, lazy mornings balancing family fun and you time.
Even if you enjoy your job, the transition from holiday to work can be hard, particularly in September as the days begin to shorten.”..
Luckily our State Broadcaster has some handy tips on how to avoid this catastrophe,and it’s not by resigning and living on the dole..
“Tara Humphrey, a primary care leadership consultant, advocates keeping her out-of-office on for her first day back.
“It’s about hiding, if you can, just to give yourself that bit of headspace.”
Very nice.
“It is not just the holiday itself that makes them so enjoyable and beneficial, the anticipation of going also plays a key role, says Dr Mark Williamson, chief executive officer of Action for Happiness, a charity.
And what type of holiday or how long you go for can make a difference to the overall impact.
Williamson points to what he says is “genuinely surprising” research , externalwhich suggests physically active holidays may be better for wellbeing than simply lying by the pool.”
Chief executive officer of Action for Happiness,a charity unsurprisingly..thanks for that and thanks to our BBC where nobody does fuck all of any importance.
Cloud cuckoo land cuntery from a world leader in it.
P45 Oven.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx2d1vy0827o
3
Watch 125mph road menace grandad ‘Mad Kenny’ rammed by police after threatening Coast Road ‘carnage’ – Chronicle Live https://share.google/kCnoZQUjKHakLvpEq
MAD KENNY.😜
If you call yourself Mad kenny,
your not necessarily mad.
you might be a bit daft.
or slightly puddled.
But not this grandad.
driving at speeds of 150mph on the wrong side of the road.
he phoned the police threatening carnage and telling them his name was MAD KENNY.
its nice when someone lives up to their nickname.
and that dangerous driving isn’t just for Middlesbrough teenagers.
Give me a diablo sandwich and a dr pepper I’m in hot pursuit of a maniac,
sumbitch.
said Northumbria police
3