Cunt music (19)

A page dedicated to, well, cunt music. If you’ve got some suggestions, we’ll check ’em out and add ’em to the list.

LONDON UNDERGROUND
Well spotted by Clactonite, here’s a little ditty dedicated to the cunts at London Underground – richly deserved if you live in London and have to tolerate their shit!

YOU PUT THE CUNT IN CUNTRY
A lovely little cuntry ditty from Scuzz Twittly

SHUT THE FUCK UP – YOU’RE A STUPID CUNT
Here’s a cunt called the Pink Guy singing – if you can call it that

Here’s US comedienne Sarah Silverman telling us what she thinks of divas. Bonio take note…
DIVA

GIVE HER A KICK IN THE CUNT

PIERS MORGAN IS A CUNT
Yes, he certainly is – so why not sing about it?

Steve Coogan sums it all up for us regulars on this blog…
EVERYBODY’S A BIT OF A CUNT SOMETIMES

Roy ‘Chubby’ Brown sums it all up nicely for us. We all know one, don’t we?

HE’S A CUNT

Here’s an absolute cracker found by Shaun of the Dead…

THE WHEEL OF CUNT

Here’s an offering from Kevin Bloody Wilson. We’ve all had one haven’t we?..
A CUNT OF A DAY

Guess we all know the tune and the words are pretty easy, so altogether now…
YOU ARE A CUNT

James Brown meets some cunt or other in this classic bit of cuntish soul music
FUCKING CUNT/AWKWARD BASTARD by Up Yaws…

Here’s one to sing with the lads after a few pints at the ‘Goat in Boots’
THE CUNT SONG by some cunt or other…

Don’t how this one slipped through the net so long – a classic track nominated by Dioclese…
USE MY ARSEHOLE AS A CUNT by the incomparable Kunt and the Gang

Thanks to Sir Limply Stoke for this charming rendition on the ukelele that certainly ain’t George Formby although he might have had some success with it…
YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS A CUNT by Emily Carter

I’m indebted to regular contributor, Fred west, for this excellent piece of alternative Christmas Carolling by Fascinating Aida…
TRY NOT TO BE A CUNT AT CHRISTMAS by Fascinating Aida

Here’s one by that musical cunt, ChasC. If you don’t recognize the cunts, then it’s your own fault because you cunted them. All the pictures came off this blog…
TOO MANY CUNTS TO COUNT by Chas C

And here’s another one that was sent in by regular contributor, Fred West…
CUNTS ARE STILL RUNNING THE WORLD by Jarvis Cocker

And here’s one from the girlies…
YOU ARE A CUNT by Kat McSnatch

70 thoughts on “Cunt music (19)

  1. Cold cunts Are pure unabashed shit non musical cunts.. Tom Jones is a cunt – but at least he can sing – David Bowie is also a daft cunt.

  2. That little toad, Jools Holland, has got his usual array of horsemuck for his (filmed in November) Hootenanny…. Spice Girl, Mel C (there’s a coup!), tuneless Jocks, The Proclaimers, Lisa Stansfield (playing All Around The World for the umpteenth time!), Ray Davies (loved The Kinks. But he’s knackered now!) and Ruby Turner (there’s a fucking surprise!). In other words, no big names whatsoever… Must be thankful, mind you… At least that atonal mockney bint, Lily Allen isn’t on it… Her cunt of a dad probably will be though…

  3. The worst is fucking cunt slade and ploddy noddy kiddy fiddler holder, fucking talentless moronic cunts

      • Be careful who you call ‘Kiddie fiddlers’, you cunt.
        for all we know, you may fiddle with kiddies yourself.

      • U mad M8 , and no your a cunt cause your trying to create a fascist environment by telling us what to think. Wait is that you Roy and just because you got off means shit to me, Just because Stormcock was alright doesnt make you a demi-god.

      • Slade were fucking ace! Jim Lea was the brains, and without him there is no Slade…

        Blur vs Oasis my arse… Slade vs T. Rex was more like it…

      • I like slade but I loved ambrose slade even more even though half of the songs are covers they are very faithful to the originals, they had two instrumentals that sound very prog like. Beginnings was my favorite slade album had a bit of every thing although I’d like to check out that slade movie its hard to find i think. Im just not crazy bout glam rock although a few slade songs I like .

    • Best way to not get cancer is to eat your vegetables, cancer hates vegetables , but then again spivey says that only the royals have access to non cancer foods , then again i think they have access to very good healthcare ,organic non polluted foods and spivey is a delusion cunt. But what if he’s right….?

  4. I heard that ‘Birdhouse In Your Soul’ for the first time in years this morning…

    They Might Be Giants? They Might Be Cunts, more like…

    • I think old Pete has been eclipsed by the musical antichrist, Simon Cowell…
      But I agree that Waterman is a cunt… The crap he inflicted on people (and the charts) was horrendous…. Jason Donovan (couldn’t sing if his life depended on it!), Kylie Minogue (although I wanted to, and I still would!), Big Fun (three Ken doll clones – and cunts!), The Reynolds Girls (tuneless Scouse cunts!), Rick Astley (say no more!), Sonia (another Scouse cunt!)… Waterman was also responsible for criminally reviving the career of Bananarama and his collaboration with Cliff was possibly the ultimate musical cunt summit….

    • I quite like Sonia’s ode to relentless stalking and unrequited love. ‘And you’ll never stop me from loving you/ it doesn’t really matter what you put me through/ you’ll never stop/ me from loving you-u’

      Endlessly upbeat and saccharine pop over demented lyrics sung by a redheaded scouse bint.

  5. Not a dab hand at this inter web hoopla so could not work oit how to turn on these video whosits orf before playing another one. Result being a felicitous mash up (so me butler terms it) orf multiple cunt song. Try it for yourself, get two or three or the whole fucking lot orf ’em playing at once.

  6. Cunt music/musicians as follows ;Baddiel/Skinner and Lightening Seeds,Coldplay,Paul McCartney,,Bob Geldof,Cliff,Kate Bush,Billy Bragg,Enya,Sinead o’Conner,Thom Yorke,the Nolans,Demis Roussos,Alfie Boe (nailed on cunt),Sting,Bono…..obviously this is a rather objective list and i have purposely omitted contemporary boy/girl bands,X factor etc and any rap music as i would be on here forever.Lots of love uncle Jon.

  7. I’m a prize cunt, I know this cos, I’ve been told on many occasions.

    Christmas cuntmusic in shops, played in fucking September! Wtf is that all about? Especially those of Sir cunt Richard. Don’t get me started on the counting Christmas cards etc on sale before fucking Halloween, pfft

    Maybe I should start a new thread….🙄 Sorry fellow counters.

    I hate a mate who was rather fond of Sir Cliff of the not-so-wholesome, he was a twat cuntybollocks…..soon got rid of him.

  8. As,it’s nearly the witching hour and my day off from work being a cunt is coming to end, I thought I’d have a last cunt on here before beddie byes.

    Whilst flicking through the cunting waste of space channels on me teevee, I nearly choked on my cocoa, Michael Bublicunt and Daniel O’ Cuntonell CDs are out for purchase.

    Indeed the Christ Mass is coming……. St Daniel O’Cuntonell has released more of his drivel ready for his legions of piss stinking fans…..I can’t stand the cunt and the painfull drivel he warblers out, they should use his cd to extract info out of informers.
    Same goes to that twat from Canda, Michael Bublicunt!
    Oh yes……it’s that time of year again….Bah Cunting Humbug!

  9. Any nominations for bands/artists who were good, but ended up being cunts? I suppose one could say Pink Floyd after that ‘Endless River’ drivel, but to me there is no Floyd without Roger, Rick, or Syd… So yeah, Floyd as a two man ‘brand name’ but not Floyd as a band… There are others though, so I’ll start it off…

    The once ace Chicago Transit Authority became the MOR monster cunts known as Chicago… Terry Kath got usurped by Peter Cetera and they were fucked… From a great blues based collective to the Karate fucking Kid…

    Small Faces… The once great 60s band became a ridiculous self parody in the late 70s, doing total crap as new material and Steve Marriott trying to be a ‘punk’ and looking like a cunt in the process (as mentioned by Dio on this site)… No Ronnie Lane either, so that was one major reason why it didn’t work…

    Deep Purple… Blackmore going up his own arse and antagonising/sacking/forcing out Ian Gillan and Roger Glover to bring in David Coverdale and Glenn Hughes…. Cov was a good singer, but he wasn’t Gillan and Hughes was just a knob… Then Richie himself fucked off and they became an even bigger joke with the Tommy Bolin fiasco…

    The Stone Roses… Great band, good lads, but lazy bastards… Four years after the reunion was announced, three years after Heaton Park, and still no album… Two one sided (ie: no B-Sides) singles and that’s it (ie: two songs)… Hope they do put out a belting album, but this is almost as bad as waiting for ‘Second Coming’ was… I recall the joke at the time: Terry Waite gets off the plane and asks, ‘Has The Stone Roses album come out yet?’ I do hope an album comes out and they don’t become a ‘greatest hits’ touring band… Don’t become cunts, lads…

    • Stone Roses? Too late m8… they are a bunch of cunts. We’re cunts when they first came out and they’re still cunts now.

  10. I like to think Piers Morgan has redeemed himself a little bit after his ‘spat’ with that cunt from Star Wars and Madonna, who is just a fucking huge talentless cunt.

    Still a cunt but with a small ‘c’.

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