The Winter Olympics on the Beebistan Broadcasting Corporation.
So it’s time again for the love in that is the Olympics, on BBC, the four yearly shitfest of sportspersons and activities you’ve never actually heard of. The Winter Olypmics is a particular favourite.
Curling. Polishing some Ice with a brush so a fucking great stone can slide along it. Not taking a good shit, as I wrongly assumed. Appears to be done by Scottish dikes and Norwegians.
Moguls. Strapping ski planks to your feet and sliding down a bumpy slope covered in snow. Looks like a good way to have a stint in A&E to me.
Snowboarding. An excuse for a bunch of ‘right on’ lefty snowflakes to get a free holiday and wear ludicrous clothes whilst hacking on about half pipes, twists and catching air. Grow up you fucktards.
And finally good old Claire Balding, every cunts favourite lesbian who told us yesterday that she would be ‘doing the show’ from Salford, because it’s 4am in Korea and it’s very cold. No shiting Claire, is that why they call it the ‘winter’ Olympics?
Nominated by Leonardo Di Cunty.
Eurgh the tedium of the Winter Olympics. I only had it on accidentally and within 2 minutes I wanted to slit my own throat.
This thing is only on TV so that the new rich semi-intelligent/conscious middle classes can pretend they’re interested in sports. They can then use this discussion of “real world events” to distract from their small time dynasty building for their spoiled vomitous liberal offspring.
Its so fucking boring. Its like bingo in atmosphere and excitement. What is the point apart from some humanist celebration of bullshit. Who gives a shit if someone can skii or ice skate quicker than someone else? What good did it do anyone?
Their are numerous criticisms because of “tribalism” in football and other sports, but that’s because people give a shit! Because it’s exciting! Opening another bottle.of wine never gave meaning to anything.
One day when there isn’t a global media vacuum waiting for arbitrary sports to fill its schedules for the media spoon fed middle classes, this wank will.be forgotton, and sports like curling and skiing will be left to whatever local mutants have the spare time and inclination to do it. And good luck to them, its probably fun, but fun isn’t necessarily interesting to watch, so it doesn’t mean it should be on TV globally. A shitting contest would frankly be more interesting, and get a more focused audience.
So fuck the winter olympics and the cunts who watch it. There is always something better to do unless you are a brain dead moron who thinks its sport you can watch and be discussed over dinner and wine and not be embarrased about because lower class people watch it, like football or snooker.
Nominated by Cunting Rank Wags
