Any Jack Palance I can put forward King Kong’s mother for a cunting?

Of course I speak of Serena Williams. The cunt has just gone off on one because she lost a final. Fuck me lady, have they removed all the fucking mirrors in your house you butt ugly cunt. Please, go and fucking haunt some houses, you self indulgent, useless player of a cunt.

Nominated by Dry Itchy Cunt

It’s actually good that Williams’ gotten so much attention because you can see her without the usual photoshop enhancement horseshit “beauty” she’s portrayed as in magazines and the press.
Now you see her “warts” and all

I don’t know whether “ugly” cuts the mustard to describe her… please someone come up with something more fitting, ‘cos ugly only covers the outside, and she’s even more ugly inside
Talking about fitting, what the fuck was that thing she was wearing today? A tutu on a 200lb woman don’t look good , she looked like an extra from “Gone with the Wind”

Not to worry though, she can always sell off the lace netting to a seine fisherman, or to the police when they have to drag a river, and maybe she’ll get some of her money back.

Nominated by Paul ya Plonker

Tantrums in the tennis world are as old as Keith Vaz’s *expenses misunderstandings*, but usually when they do it, it is truly disgusting to witness, especially in the case of Serena Slubberguts Williams. Perhaps she is upset because not so many have sailed on her as the good ship Venus*, perhaps the baby blues have caught up with her, but just watch her outburst as her 30 stone frame waddles up to umpire to castigate him.

“Use own me a APOLOGY!. I NEVER cheat, honeychild..I have a daughter!”…yes that is the true cunt coming out. The giant economy tub of lard hasn’t been doing too well of late: well she had a daughter, make allowances honkey. She bounces back and scores a win: well what a hero she is, as she so recently had a daughter. This is a true miracle for wimmin and motherhood.

This big mouthed heap of sweating 50 inch jugs, and reinforced arse, which looks as it was modelled on the boot of the old Austin Somerset, ought to be grateful she is over paid for doing a job she loves and is able to do so even though she has a daughter. Let’s hope she spends the money wisely. She is so big she has to get her knickers on prescription, and there are no freebies in the States (perhaps she will emigrate to Britain provided she isn’t too upset about Brexit).

Mum of the decade lost this time (as you will have guessed from her outburst), and what a change it is not to hear one of the Williams sisters win yet again (same applies to old Novak Jockastrap in the same racket/racquet and fuckwit on wheels Lewis Hamilton, who only loses when somebody cuts the vain little snowflake up, or gets lucky – never able to admit that somebody else was better on the day.

In fact fuck all professional sportsmen with their greedy pretentious sense of entitlement. Especially when they are obese.

Nominated by W.C Boggs

I’d like to nominate Serena Williams for a Grand Slam of a cunting. If you think Andy Mugray is a virtue-signalling cunt of the highest order, then you ain’t seen nothin’ yet. ‘Ms’ Serena Williams not only ticks many of the minority boxes but is a total fucking victim with it.

I could bore you with how this cunt abuses gamesmanship and endlessly fucking feigns injury to win over hearts and minds on the tennis court. I could don the anorak and inform all parties about her ‘panic room incident’ – back in 2011 official drug testers paid her a visit at home to literally take the piss, she ‘mistook’ them for intruders and hid in her mansion emergency room (safe space, natch). Said drug testers were shooed away and never ended up taking a sample. Nothing suspicious there, huh?

I could even remind you how this beast momentarily dropped her liberal-adorned halo at the 2009 US Open, getting disqualified by threatening to have some lowly Korean line judge killed.

But no. That’s all small fry.

Serena Williams is a proper fucking cunt because she leaps on every possible bandwagon to avoid any and all criticism, as well as shameless self-promotion on the back of ‘wimminz’ issues. Don’t acknowledge me as the best athlete ever? Racist. Don’t think my shitty one-sided tennis matches are as good as the men’s? Sexist.

And today we read about her wading into the media campaign against some male tennis player – laughably called Tennys Sondgren – who was revealed to be following right-wing figures on Twitter. Outcunting herself in extremis, Serena Williams ‘demanded’ an apology from this male player. An apology. For following someone on fucking bastard Twitter.

Who the fuck does this behemoth of a cunt from the ghetto thinks she is, wading into something which she isn’t remotely involved in? An apology demand from the fucking cunt who, to this very day, refuses to apologise for abusing the aforementioned Korean line judge. The problem with this fucking shitcunt is that she has truly fell into the pond of her own hype, like Narcissus, complete with her Beyonce-tier ‘independent sister’ and mother-Earth baby photoshoot cliches.

Game, set and cunt – Serena Williams.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

Serena Williams is indeed a monumental cunt. Not only her but her gangling freak of a sister and a mother who is the epitome of the ‘Don’t you know who we are’ set of self important jumped up cunts who have had their morals dissolved by vast amounts of the filthy lucre.

To hear Miss Williams grunting and screeching her way through such boring matches is akin to striking one testicles repeatedly with a ball pein hammer and I shudder to think what the fuck her ‘booty’ will look like in 5 years. I think the sun will have severe competition on the eclipse front.

I for one can’t wait for the day these cunts play their final matches at Wimbledon and we see the last of this clan.

Nominated by Kendo Nag

EMERGENCY CUNTING! Serena Williams has got married and proves there’s nothing worse than an uppity coon and that nothing exceeds quite like excess.

An entire block of LA was sealed off for the event which was held at the Contemporary Arts Center.

The wedding cost more than $1m and guests were asked not to bring their mobile phones because of an exclusive deal with Vogue. After all, wouldn’t want to have to pay for it yourself!

Kim Kardashian, Venus Williams, Beyonce, and the members of New Edition, who played a five-song set during the reception, were spotted arriving at the venue’s VIP entrance for the biggest celebrity cuntfest in recent years. Guests were also gifted one of Williams’ unique golden trophy party favors. Each guest table at the event had been named after one of Williams’ 12 grand slam titles, and her favors were recreations of the trophies she received for each corresponding title. Pretenieuse? Moi!?! Not moi! Moi tres important!!!!

99p on eBay. Free postage. Buy one, get one free!

Each room inside has a different type of music, and the bands rotate from room to room. In addition to the music, guests were also treated to doughnuts from local favorite District Donuts Sliders Brew, and were able to take a spin on a carousel that was built just a few days ago especially for the event.

Money certainly can’t buy class it seems

One, of course, has to feel sorry for J-Zee. Poor little lamb could only pop in briefly before he had to rush off in his private jet to his next tour date. Still, let’s hope he didn’t miss out on his tasteful little goldplayed trophy. That would be too much to bear.

Doubt we’ll beat this one for the cuntfest of the decade!

Nominated by Arfur Fucksake