The Sex Pistols

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The Sex Pistols are routinely cited as one of the greatest bands in history, along with their debut (and only) album Never Mind the Bollocks… The truth is the Pistols had nothing to do with music or youth culture…. They were simply one of the greatest marketing operations of all time, whose rise to fame was made immensely easier by the shockingly backward state of 1977’s society…

If there’s one revolution the Pistols kickstarted, it was the idea that anything shocking – no matter how dumb, vacant, or closer to the lowest common denominator – is going to generate cash, and that’s the harvest we’re still reaping to this day with gems a-la Pete Doherty, Liam Gallagher, or even Jade Goody…. Get your name in the paper through whatever stunt or nonsense, look wasted, wear the right clothes and wag that oh-so-rebellious finger and half the job’s done…

Look at the publicity generated by one of the most stupid moments in the history of British telly, the Bill Grundy interview in which the affected young clowns make the presenter’s job stupidly easy. “Go on, you’ve got another ten seconds. Say something outrageous.” “You dirty bastard”. “Go on, again”. “You dirty facker! Worra facking rotta!”. If you’ve got a pet dog at home you may know exactly how it works…..

And then there was that swastika wearing, samckhead, psychotic prick, Sid Vicious… He was a proper cunt…

Nominated by: Norman

Kanye West

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If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Kanye West, I would shoot Kanye West twice…

Funny to see all them wankstains at Glastonbury: all those white English folk singing along to Kanye Kunt’s set, and then all the furtive looks and awkwardness when it came to the ‘N’ word….

Nominated by: Norman

Phillip Schofield

Phillip Schofield with Gordon the Gopher

Mr ITV himself, Phillip Schofield, deserves to be cunted everyday for the next Millennium.

This fucking silver haired smarmy cunt seems to infect ITV’s output endlessly (This Morning, The Cube, Dancing On Shite, Mr & Mrs etc etc). Even Ebola & AIDS are less virulent than this stoat faced weasel.

He prances around on TV like he fucking owns the media, he is the equivalent of Magnolia Emulsion & he seems to think he is somehow a God because he has 3 million followers on Twitter (maybe someone should tell him A. 80% of those are BOTS & B. the other 20% are dormant accounts.)

A true cunt who I would happily beat to death with a rolled up Newspaper, it may take a week but I would enjoy administering EVERY single blow – the CUNT

Nominated by: got fiddy pee for da leccy meter

Neil Hamilton

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For fuck’s sake what’s the matter with you cunts?!?

I cannot believe that no cunt out there has ever cunted this cunt on “…is a cunt”. And now just to make things worse, his cunt of a mate Farage has finally managed to get the cunt onto UKIP’s NEC. What’s the matter with UKIP? Have the cunts got a death wish?

This cunt is a fucking electoral liability. The rank and file membership think he’s a cunt, I think he’s a cunt and, frankly, it wouldn’t surprise me if the fragrant Christine thinks he’s a cunt.

Neil Hamilton is cunt amongst cunts; a veritable ubercunt; a cunt so large it could could swallow the Houses of Parliament. Whole. In one gulp. Cunts don’t come more cuntish than that!

Yes, Neil Hamilton IS a cunt – and anyone who disagrees is also a cunt.

Nominated by: Dioclese

Mark Stewart

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I went to see “The Pop Group” play in Islington last night. Always loved the band and forgave them their right-on 6th form politics when they were young enough not to know better. Now here they are, well into their 50s and still banging on about the arms trade and Irish political prisoners.

Therefore, it saddens me after he provided such an entertaining evening, to have to nominate Mark Stewart for a cunting.

Nominated by: Harry Axwound