Pamela Anderson

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Pamela Anderson is a cunt…

Apart from being at least 90% plastic/silicone/Fibreglass and having the dignity of a blubottle on a turd, this silly old cow is still flaunting herself in lad’s mags… I went in the paper shop for a (Manchester) Evening News and the daft bitch is on the cover of FHM… First off, FHM must be hard up for dolly birds if this is the best they get these days… That Tulisa cumbucket was bad enough, but a plastic granny?!

Also, isn’t it pathetic that, 20 years later, the old tart is still getting her kit off to get noticed or paid? And the face on it? It’s surgery gone mad/wrong on par with Michael Jackson…

It’s like that other (well overused) cunt, Madonna: dressing like a prossie when she’s pushing 60… Where’s the class or self respect? Give it up. grandmamas…

Nominated by: Norman

Vegetarianism

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I can’t stand all these “I don’t eat meat” cunts, yet they buy ‘Veggie’ Sausages, Bacon etc. I mean if you didn’t want to eat meat why buy something that mimics it?

Another thing if we didn’t eat meat back in the olden days (ice age) we wouldn’t have survived without the calories the meat gave us, the fur to keep warm and the fats for lighting the torches etc. Also farming techniques weren’t developed enough to grow loads of fucking organic vegetables neatly in a massive field. We were HUNTER gatherers at least thats my guess.

How many of these vegetarians wear Leather etc? I don’t have an issue with people choosing to be veggies but don’t fucking tell me eating meat is wrong, you cunts. Now give me a pork chop…

Nominated by: Black & White Cunt

Mens Fragrance advertising

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I wish to nominate those poxy ‘Mens Fragrance ‘ ads.

For fucks sake come on! Do the the admen who make those fucking irritating things think we are that fuckin stupid. ‘Wear this stuff and you too will become a member of the ’beautiful people’! Errrr, no you won’t – you’ll still be Lee getting up to work your 10 hour shift down the abbatoir. And what’s with those hushed tones? Its just some poxy perfume ffs.

Oh and its also vastly over priced. Thats because its got the word ‘designer ‘ in it innit? There’s not so many of these idiotic ads around at the moment but just watch from late September they’ll be everywhere.

Nominated by: Ozymandias

Team Building

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I think most have had to endure the indignity of the out of office “team building day”

The evil harpies in Human Resources spend the entire year plotting how to put people into non functioning disparate teams, just for this one day of humiliation. It’s a bit like the hunger games but with string and ping pong balls.

But a constant of the universe means in any given dysfunctional team, there will be one control freak who “knows” how to make a bridge out of paper and spit.

The rest of us fuck off to the bar, trying to work out the seemingly intractable problem of getting the knickers off Tracey from accounting

Nominated by: Andy C