Allah

I’ve noticed that Allah has never been cunted on this site. Is he out of bounds then? If not, then has there ever been a more appropriate moment to cuntify the biggest villain of all sky fairies and his demented followers who take offence to everything and show responsibility for nothing?

By ‘never a more appropriate time’ I do of course mean with the exception of the Lee Rigby attack in May 2013, the Westminster attack in March 2017, the London Bombings in July 2005, the rape of over a thousand children across the last decade and the dozens of other ‘lesser’ assaults and savagery we have had to endure at the hands of the media’s most favoured religion.

As Voltaire once said “”To learn who rules over you, pay attention to those you cant criticize.” And as Allah said in response: “Kill the filthy Infidel, kill, kill, kill!”

Nominated by Megacunt

Star Wars fans

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Star Wars fans are cunts… Don’t get me wrong, I loved the original trilogy (although Return Of The Jedi was a bit shite!)…

But these cunts – grown fucking adults – who dress as fucking Yoda, queue for hours to get an autograph from some unknown fucker who appeared onscreen for 10 seconds in a Stormtrooper costume in 1977, and treat the Jedi like it is a true spiritual path are complete and utter cunt trumpets…

That new villain looks like a piss-poor Darth Vader too.. Black cloak and mask? Red lightsabre? Been done and it won’t be bettered… His name is hardly menacing either… Kylo Ren? Sounds like an episode of the Ren & Stimpy Show: where the dog and cat duo learn kung-fu…

Nominated by: Norman

WTF! There was a cunt of a Star Wars fan on the Beeb this morning who been queuing for a ticket since December 5th!!!

And the Beeb and Sky are cunts as well for presenting this as mainstream news. Never mind Syria or the EU non-renegotiation, the lead story is the latest over-egging of a second rate shite film. I’m a big SF fan, but Star wars is second rate bollocks…

Nominated by : Dioclese

Ant & Dec [2]

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I hate unfunny spackmo keith Lemon, i’d love to twat the cunt in the face with big bat with nails on it, then feed him Ant and Dec (also known as cunt and dick) then Lemon can shat out Ant and Dec, THEN use stupid unfunny cunt Lee Francis (aka Lemon) head as a shitty stick to poke Ant and Dic down the fucking skiddy toilet

Unfunny talentless cunts, only famous by being at the right place at the right time, i’d like a hungry lion to be released Live during ‘I’m a so-called Celebrity get me out of here’ and watch the lion rip out Ant and Decs fucking throats and rip off limps etc, yep, you guessed it, I FUCKING HATE THEM and the Ant and Dec overkill on TV

Nominated by: I hate Ant & Dec

Craft beer

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So called craft beer is a cunt. Or specifically American craft brewers are cunts who produce some of the most obnoxious filth I have ever tasted in my extensive beer swigging life. Some of it is just undrinkable, like it has everything turned up to 11.

So what if you know about strike temperatures and grist to liqour ratios and so what if you use only the most obscure 6 row barley specially imported from fuck knows where? It’s all a bit pointless if you can’t drink the fucking stuff. Jalapeno flavour beer? Coffee flavour beer? Pumpkin flavour beer? How about a beer flavour beer you fucking cunt? Or would that be too “traditional” for you, you bushy bearded base ball cap the wrong way round wearing tattooed cunt?

And why make it 7% ABV? For fucks sake, how are you supposed to swig a gallon of 7% beer? And they are not shy with it either, 10 dollars a pint. They even have the same shit in Bangkok only its even more expensive here as its over 8 quid a pint which is more than most Thais see in a week. Cunts.

Nominated by: Fat Rich

Pamela Anderson

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Pamela Anderson is a cunt…

Apart from being at least 90% plastic/silicone/Fibreglass and having the dignity of a blubottle on a turd, this silly old cow is still flaunting herself in lad’s mags… I went in the paper shop for a (Manchester) Evening News and the daft bitch is on the cover of FHM… First off, FHM must be hard up for dolly birds if this is the best they get these days… That Tulisa cumbucket was bad enough, but a plastic granny?!

Also, isn’t it pathetic that, 20 years later, the old tart is still getting her kit off to get noticed or paid? And the face on it? It’s surgery gone mad/wrong on par with Michael Jackson…

It’s like that other (well overused) cunt, Madonna: dressing like a prossie when she’s pushing 60… Where’s the class or self respect? Give it up. grandmamas…

Nominated by: Norman