Mummy running late

I’d like to Cunt (running late) mothers dropping off or picking up the brats from school.

In the morning they will do anything to get the kids dropped off right at the school fucking gate … I’d a pyjama clad fucking mother drive a good 50 yards up the wrong side of the fucking road (that was my side) so the kid could be dropped off at the gate. I couldn’t figure what was happening as I thought she was only pulling in ‘down the street’ to drop the kid off … No, no, no .. pull in, yes… but keep driving up the wrong side of the road. I’d to pull across the street and she still didn’t acknowledge I was even there.

And at the end of the day .. if you are within a quarter of a mile of any school at around knocking off time.. look out, ‘Late Mummy’ is on her way … she’s late and couldn’t give a fuck about any other road user. She’s had big Winston round since the kids were dropped off, had a bit of a snooze, forgot the time , then suddenly realised her kiddy winkle needs picking up. She can’t be late as her old man will ask her why. She then drives like a fucking maniac to the school gates.

Next time you see a single woman drive like a fucking idiot mid afternoon … check your watch .. it will be ‘the back of three o’clock’, and you will be within the vicinity of a school.


Nominated by: Boilsmypiss

Mums on social media

Beautiful family of two people and laptop.

Young Facebook Mums/Insta-Mums (or Moms as British girls insist on saying these days) are cunts.

Many of these vapid, pram-faced slags get up the duff by some feckless chav with a double-digit IQ who then subsequently fucks off leaving aforementioned pram-face and sprog to a life of abject mediocrity and uselessness whilst living on benefits.

A lot of these young mums are bang tidy so when I stumble across their public Instagram profiles it’s really disheartening to be subjected to pic after pic of the bog-eyed little bastard taken every five fucking minutes. Then there is the time-consuming task of scrolling down through the seemingly never-ending 9 month stream of selfies of her and “bump”……….. just in order to get to the juicy pre-pregnancy wanking material like holiday bikini photos.

Listen love; stop advertising your kids life on the internet for all to see – the little tyke can’t consent to this and may not appreciate it when he/she grows up. Also, apart from your fellow walking incubators and some internet nonces, no cunt wants to see pictures of your ugly fucking kid.

Just show us your tits (preferably without the horrible little goblin hanging off them).

Nominated by: Lenny Long-Legg III