Josie Long

Josie Long is an archetypal cunt symptomatic of everything shite in today`s society.I confess I only knew the bitches name and that she was a comedian but all female comedians of a certain age group all fucking morph into one amalgomous glob of utter shite to me!Anyway I saw on my Facebook timeline a video of her with purple hair looking like she hasn`t slept or washed in days entitled “Are white people doing enough to stop white terrorism”.I honestly did not even need to watch the video as it was so predictable that I could tell she was going to slag off the right defends Muslims gloss over Muslim terrorist attacks invoke Hitler blame “toxic masculinity” and speak in a slow sarcastic mockney voice… and guess what I was absolutely fucking spot on.Apparently Mssss Long is more worried about far right terrorism than Islamic terrorism which is logically insane as hundreds have lost their lives to Islamist terror attacks this year but the so called “far right” is only responsible for one death in this country this year and the victim was Muslim so how you deduce your conclusions must be through the prism of sticking a pair of scissors into your ear hole so far that it digs into your brain! She also said that we tend to equate white terror attacks to lone wolfs…well the guy behind the Finsbry Mosque and Tommy Mair had no known current connections to a wider network of extremists.So what the fuck else do you label them as in that case? Muslim terrorists on the other hand have nearly been part of a wider network.This isn`t a right wing conspiracy :It is fact.She said she felt angry about Finsbury Mosque but sad after the Manchester bombings.Just like Comrade Corbyn (Who she is a massive fan of shockingly) she only shows her disgust and emotion at terror attacks one the person is brown. Long is also going on about how she is newly single.Is it any wonder you were dumped though love?You look like a typical feminist gender studies tumblr retard who smells of b.o and cheap weed and that hasn`t used a comb since she was 6 years old.What pisses me off about her ilk and by that I mean Oxford-educated self-proclaimed comediennes who look like bull dykes/gender studies professors and momentum activists is this: They are so predictable it is spooky.Upon googling this cunt I found an article she did with the evening standard that started “Josie Long explains why she’s making a show about optimism after …” and without even opening it I guessed the next word was Brexit and yes it was.These people are so dense due to society dumbing down and not encouraging independent thought meaning that misfits try and join a counterculture by becoming part of the cultural mainstream of the last 40 years and they don`t even possess the analytical skill of self-awareness and reflection to realize the hilariously retarded contradiction that is their very existence!

I am not going to slag her off as a comedienne because I don`t recall seeing any of her material although I am sure I briefly have at some point watched a segment of her on Live at the Apollo then turned it over after losing the will to live.But typing in Josie Long is a cunt into google lead to a stream of reviews featuring the words Josie Long and Cunt so I think it is safe to say she is probably as funny as pancreatic cancer a slipped disk and alzheimers combined.

In short Josie Long is a cunt who needs to drink a wet glass of cement!

Nominated by Shaun

Dosser shite


The Good Lord ordains that what marketh man is his shite. Animal shite – unless it’s bear or pig – is generally cope able with. The human kind, orf which yours truly has vast experience orf is orf a different order orf foulness. Indian shite and particularly that that fouls the streets orf Calcutta is beyond the pale. In the Western Desert (8th Army, Rommel, that show) a good soldier learned to identify his enemy by his waste – Iti, Kraut, Wog, Yank (lots orf Yank but never near any danger) all distinctive. Hippy shite stands oit from from me days in the 60s in the Producer dodge organising festivals, particularly when mixed, as it so orften was, with mud and psychotic substances. In short I know me shite.


Orf a different order orf magnitude is dosser shite as increasingly evidenced in London, Manchester and many a South Coast toine. A veritable tsunami orf the stuff is deluging our once great nation. Glossy, brown and bloated, the sticky mucous coated crap is stuffed full orf parasites and drug resistant viruses. Indeed consider where it has been and what has produced it. Now try and get it orf your shoes without getting it smeared all over your hands and clothes.

The feral cunts squeezing their arses oit over shopping centres, public streets and people’s front gardens think they have the right to borrow a rat arsed dog with sad soulful eyes (I always offer to put the fucker doine) or hire a fake sand sculpture and beg for my money. Must declare me interest here. Do a spot orf lay preaching at me local church and have regular occasion to shovel dosser shite (see photos) oit orf our front garden. Call the Council? Fuck orf. No other cunt will touch it.

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke



Star Trek fans are pretty fucking mental, they could tell you the star date captain Kirk farted in season 1 episode 9.

Star Trek is shite. The premise “explore new worlds and not interfere with other worlds.” They break this prime directive every episode and then are found to be in mortal peril.

The solution is always a variant of:
rerouting, inverting or generating a sub space field or the warp core inverters/manipulating the plasma flow is the ways above.
the end

Fucking wank, on a par with Dr Who,

Nominated by: Peter Griffin

Independence Day


I just can’t let the 4th of July go by without marking it by cunting the entire nation of the United States of America. It just wouldn’t be right.

Every year, these wankers celebrate the “nations freedom and the brave men who died defending it”. That’d be the brave men who illegally invade foreign countries, stomp all over any nation that disagrees with them, and forces their dogma on the entire world. The biggest bunch of hypocritical bullshitters on the face of the planet.

The nation that “defends freedoms future” by bombing the fuck out of anyone who gets in their way.

The nation that turned up late for two world wars. Britain would would still be waiting now if it wasn’t for Pearl Harbour.

The nation that was populated by the dregs from the gutters of Europe and whose slogan was “No taxation without representation” when the British crown never received a fucking penny in taxes in the first place.

The nation that has laid claim to every invention it never invented and has rewritten history to suit its own ego. Orwell would have been proud.

Basically, a nation of cunts. Happy 4th July, you fuckers!

Nominated by: Dioclese

Kanye West


If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Kanye West, I would shoot Kanye West twice…

Funny to see all them wankstains at Glastonbury: all those white English folk singing along to Kanye Kunt’s set, and then all the furtive looks and awkwardness when it came to the ‘N’ word….

Nominated by: Norman