Josie Long

Josie Long is an archetypal cunt symptomatic of everything shite in today`s society.I confess I only knew the bitches name and that she was a comedian but all female comedians of a certain age group all fucking morph into one amalgomous glob of utter shite to me!Anyway I saw on my Facebook timeline a video of her with purple hair looking like she hasn`t slept or washed in days entitled “Are white people doing enough to stop white terrorism”.I honestly did not even need to watch the video as it was so predictable that I could tell she was going to slag off the right defends Muslims gloss over Muslim terrorist attacks invoke Hitler blame “toxic masculinity” and speak in a slow sarcastic mockney voice… and guess what I was absolutely fucking spot on.Apparently Mssss Long is more worried about far right terrorism than Islamic terrorism which is logically insane as hundreds have lost their lives to Islamist terror attacks this year but the so called “far right” is only responsible for one death in this country this year and the victim was Muslim so how you deduce your conclusions must be through the prism of sticking a pair of scissors into your ear hole so far that it digs into your brain! She also said that we tend to equate white terror attacks to lone wolfs…well the guy behind the Finsbry Mosque and Tommy Mair had no known current connections to a wider network of extremists.So what the fuck else do you label them as in that case? Muslim terrorists on the other hand have nearly been part of a wider network.This isn`t a right wing conspiracy :It is fact.She said she felt angry about Finsbury Mosque but sad after the Manchester bombings.Just like Comrade Corbyn (Who she is a massive fan of shockingly) she only shows her disgust and emotion at terror attacks one the person is brown. Long is also going on about how she is newly single.Is it any wonder you were dumped though love?You look like a typical feminist gender studies tumblr retard who smells of b.o and cheap weed and that hasn`t used a comb since she was 6 years old.What pisses me off about her ilk and by that I mean Oxford-educated self-proclaimed comediennes who look like bull dykes/gender studies professors and momentum activists is this: They are so predictable it is spooky.Upon googling this cunt I found an article she did with the evening standard that started “Josie Long explains why she’s making a show about optimism after …” and without even opening it I guessed the next word was Brexit and yes it was.These people are so dense due to society dumbing down and not encouraging independent thought meaning that misfits try and join a counterculture by becoming part of the cultural mainstream of the last 40 years and they don`t even possess the analytical skill of self-awareness and reflection to realize the hilariously retarded contradiction that is their very existence!

I am not going to slag her off as a comedienne because I don`t recall seeing any of her material although I am sure I briefly have at some point watched a segment of her on Live at the Apollo then turned it over after losing the will to live.But typing in Josie Long is a cunt into google lead to a stream of reviews featuring the words Josie Long and Cunt so I think it is safe to say she is probably as funny as pancreatic cancer a slipped disk and alzheimers combined.

In short Josie Long is a cunt who needs to drink a wet glass of cement!

Nominated by Shaun

Double Standards


I would like to nominate Double Standards for a cunting on this esteemed website.

I don’t know about anyone else but I am heartily sick of this current row about anti-Semitism in the Labour Party. Let the record show that I simply DON’T GIVE A FUCK about Israel/Palestine. Those cunts have been at each other’s throats for fucking years and probably will be for years to come. This conflict has zero relevance to British politics and we should simply mind our own fucking business. In fact, this applies to the whole damn Middle East.

The idea that Israel is uniquely wicked and the source of all the problems in the Middle East is complete and utter bollocks. If all the Jewish Israelis decided to move to New York (as the delightfully racist Nazi Shah suggested) and hand over Israel to the kleptocratic cunts of the Palestinian Authority and the religious faggots of Hamas, the result would not be peace in our time. They would not even take the time out for a celebratory piss-up ‘cos their imaginary friend doesn’t approve of booze (along with pork, women’s hair, clitorises, music and fun in general). They would be at each other’s throats before the last planeload of Jewish people had left Israeli airspace. The wankers in the Middle East don’t seem to be able to get on with anyone – Saudis hate Iranians, Turks hate Kurds, cunts hate twats, etc-fucking-etc. Everyone (the Yanks, the UN, us) should keep their noses out of the Middle East and just let them have the giant race/sectarian war they are clearly itching to have.

In the past twenty or so years, the Labour Party and the BBC-Guardianazi wankstains who run the UK media have fully embraced identity politics. Everything now is “phobia” this and “ism” that. Forgive me but what happened to individual rights and responsibilities – the very cornerstone of English common law. I firmly believe (and I think this is the philosophy of this splendid website) that you are a cunt because of what you DO not because of what you ARE.

Curiously, Jewish people and Israel appear to have been excluded from the protection that identity politics affords to every other minority group:

– When an Islamist prick blows the place up quoting chapter and verse from the Koran, the media falls over itself saying that Muslims are not to blame and that the events have nothing to do with Islam. When the IDF goes psycho or does something cuntish, somehow all Jews are to blame;

– Some black Americans play the victim about slavery (ended 150 years ago) and some Muslims whine about the Crusades (700-900 years ago) as if these events somehow justify cuntishness today. Jewish people who mention Auschwitz – still (just) in living memory – are accused of playing the Holocaust card;

– Turkey illegally occupies northern Cyprus, China swallows Tibet – silence. Israel occupies the West Bank and (used to) occupy Gaza – frenzied media BS;

– Islamist maniacs fire rockets from hospitals, kindergartens and residential areas in a deliberate attempt to kill civilians – no problem. IDF fires back – bedlam.

– Almost all countries have borders that have been forged by violence. Israel’s violent birth is the subject of wanky BBC documentaries about whether it has the “right” to exist. If Israel should return land to the Palestinians then the Arabs should return Egypt to the Copts and the Turks should bugger off back to central Asia and let that Greek priest finish his mass from 1453;

– Holocaust denial has returned to the sewer from whence it came but Holocaust inversion is all the rage;

– People who know fuck all about anything are experts in Zionism. Zionism has always been a controversial idea amongst Jews but at its heart is the idea that Jewish people are entitled to their own nation-state. Why is anti-Zionism so great then? Because most people don’t know what Zionism is and use the word in the same way Rick from The Young Ones called everything he disliked “Fascist.” The figleaf of anti-Zionism is just as racist as old-fashioned anti-Semitism. Why are the Jewish people the only national group who should be denied their own nation-state? If I said the Peruvians, the Congolese or the Burmese should be denied their own state, I would be dismissed as a loon. Why not Israelis?

– Refugees in camps on the border of Israel are the BBC-Guardianazis’ favourite victims. Israel is castigated for ethnically-cleansing its land in 1948. But somehow it is forgotten that an equal number of Jewish people were expelled from Arab countries at the same time. These Jewish communities had existed for centuries before Mo was looking for dates at the Mecca kindergarten. Israel absorbed the Jewish refugees; Arab countries preferred to leave their “brothers” to rot as political pawns.

Again, let me just say I have no love for Israel. The current Israeli government is particularly cuntish and is led by a man who could start an argument in an empty room. Israel has behaved foolishly in not pulling out of the West Bank when it left Gaza in 2005 and does seem to be held hostage to its own religious maniacs and far right buffoons. It’s the double standards I hate. Israel is a (flawed) democracy, Arab citizens have equal rights and one Arab chap sits on Israel’s Supreme Court whilst another is deputy chief of the Israeli police force. Name a single Arab country that has the same rights for Jews. In fact, name a single Arab country that has the same rights for Arabs as Israel.

And no, I am not Jewish, I don’t have a rabbi-fixation and I am not a tool of the Zionist World Conspiracy. All pointless anti-Semites reading this, please FUCK OFF in advance; I gave up looking at your illiterate, conspiracy-theory-laden, pro-Muslim ravings months ago. Enjoy the Jihad against punctuation.

Nominated by: Cunt’s Mate Cunt