Jeremy Corbyn [7]

I’ve read and heard a lot of people have been saying, “Corbyn is a man of principles.” I disagree.

He voted to NOT join the E.E.C. in the 70s; he voted AGAINST Maastricht; however when it came to the big one last year, the dozy bell-end towed the (Tory) party line, consequently both going against his “principles” as well as choosing the wrong side.

Furthermore, where were his “principles” during that whole train debacle? What an embarrassingly monumental turd he looked, despite the fact it was engineered by Richard “Atlantic-sized cunt” Branson.

All politicians are vile, foul, power-seeking liars. I like Mark Twain’s quote about giving the power to the person who wants it the least. Nonetheless, this time I’ll vote to whoever delivers Brexit the fucking quickest.

Nominated by captain Magnanimous

David Gauke [2]

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I can’t remember the specifics but I saw a note on my coffee table that aid “cunt David Gauke” and he was on telly (looking and sounding like an odious sleazy, cunty, cunty, cunting cunt) which jogged my memory.

I do recall Private Eye giving him various cuntings months / years back ‘cos he was / is some sort of finance minister rubber-stamping dodgy tax deals for tory sponsors.

If he told me he loved me I’d gladly shit in his mouth.

Nominated by: Frottom

Sir John Chilcot

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Relatives of dead servicmen have claimed Sir John, the chairman of the £10m Iraq Inquiry, is using “bully-boy tactics” to frighten them into dropping their legal action calling on him to publish his long-delayed findings.

He’s said if the High Court rules against them they’ll have to pay costs. He doesn’t say who’ll pick up the tab for his brief if he loses – the cunt.

And Cameron’s a cunt – he jeered the other cunt, Brown, when he announced the inquiry in 2009 because it wouldn’t be delivered intil July 2010, after the election. Well he’s been in charge for the 5 years since then and done fuck-all other than the occasional hand-wringing sound-bite.

If Chilcot wasn’t up to the job he shouldn’t have taken it. He flat out refuses to say who he’s waiting on as per the Maxwellisation (another cunt) rules.

He’s a fucking disgrace and gives cunts a bad name.

Nominated by: Mary Hinge-Frottom

The Ministry of Defence

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In honour of Cpl Stewart McLaughlin, and the 1,000 Para’s who marched in London yesterday, I’m nominating the Ministry of Defence, and the Government, for an intergalactic cunting.

For those who don’t know, Cpl McLaughlin was an NCO with B Company 3 Para. He was killed in the Battle of Mount Longdon, during the Falklands war, but not before carrying out several acts of spectacular bravery whilst leading several assaults on the Argentine position, one of which involved him shouting the immortal line, “follow me lads, I’m bulletproof”. His actions provided a much needed morale boost to the men in his company, and they pressed on with their attack. Unfortunately, he was killed later in the battle by artillery fire whilst being helped to an aid station, having been seriously wounded in a mortar attack.

The mortar inflicted wound that Cpl McLaughlin suffered, was received whilst taking part in an attack on Argentine position, that was lead by Sgt Ian McKay of 3 Para. During the attack, Sgt McKay and a private were killed. Sgt McKay was later awarded a posthumous VC.

After the battle, his CO wrote a citation, but due to the fact there was only one typewriter available, and a time imposed for typing up citations, Cpl McLaughlin’s was never typed out and therefore not accepted. In September of 2013, General Sir Hew Pike, who was the commander of 3 Para in the Falklands wrote a new citation that placed Cpl McLaughlin’s actions “firmly in the vicinity of a VC”. That’s right, his actions on that night were so instrumental to his Company that they were considered worthy of our nation’s highest award for valour.

The MOD and the Government, however, disagree. For 33 years successive pen pushing arseholes have continuously refused to even consider ending this injustice, and awarding the medal he not only deserves, but has more than earned. A recent ‘investigation’ has allegedly found that there was no evidence that a citation was even written. The problem is, a number of men who served and fought with Cpl McLaughlin, and witnessed his actions that nigh, have said that nobody from the Army or the MOD has ever spoken to them. That includes his former CO. Basically, the MOD carried out a bullshit investigation that only ever intended to justify their decision to refuse an award, because they didn’t want to admit that they were wrong.

On the 3rd of July 2015, around 1,000 Paras, their families, and supporters marched through London to Downing St, where Cpl McLaughlin’s son delivered a petition to Cameron. I have no doubt that the second Cpl McLaughlin’s son was out the door, posh twat threw the petition in the shredder. He’s spent the past five years destroying our military, why would he give a single fuck about a far better man than Cameron could dream of being, who died whilst serving his country? Likewise, those fat fuckers at the top of the MOD. All THEY care about is themselves. Their main preoccupation is ensuring that they have as big a pension as possible, whilst working out how much expenses money they can get away with fiddling.

None of them have ever done anything remotely deserving of an award, yet the MOD is filled with Sirs, Dames, OBE’s, MBE’s and CBE’s. Not one of those fuckers is fit to lick dog shit from the soles of Cpl McLaughlin’s boots. Yet they have the audacity to refuse to recognise a man who DOES deserve an award. They are cowards. They are scum. They and their ilk are the reason that this country has turned into a shithole. Because they’re the cunts who made it a shithole.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw

Chris Spivey [2]

A monkey wearing a Chris Spivey T-shirt

A monkey wearing a Chris Spivey T-shirt

Chris spivey deserves a massive re-cunting as the fat ignorant conspiracy theorist cunt is claiming, predictably, that the Tunisian massacre didn’t happen and was staged by “crisis actors”…

Nominated by: Fred West

A cunt out of his own mouth :

your own common sense should leave you laughing at events such as this latest crock of horseshit coming out of Tunisia

Lying British crisis actors more commonly known as Pondlife Traitor Arse-wipe Shitheads make up some hysteria inducing old bollocks after being trapped in their own tiny fucking minds and given a strict mandate to work non-existent Terrapins hurling FUCK ALL at anybody into their fantasy

The gunman who was later shot dead was named as Seifeddine Rezgui, 23 – in other words, an unpronounceable name commonly given over to nonexistent terrapins by the woefully inadequate, government sponsored false flag, scriptwriters

15 Britons were among the 38 who were mercilessly killed in the massacre yesterday and that number ‘may well rise’, Tunisia’s Foreign Minister Tobias Ellwood has said. Yeah, Tobias will be waiting on a phone call from the Cunt Cameron to tell him whether to increase the number of British dead or not.

7/7 was a false flag attack too although that was carried out on British soil. Are the Monkey-Boyz saying that this false flag in Tunisia was carried out on the orders of the British Government? Or did ISIS telephone the Cunt Cameron and tell him that this was an attack specifically targeting the British.

I apologize most sincerely for inflicting this piece of disrespectful, egotistical, sadly deluded piece of pond life on the public. I shall immediately commit suicide to asuage my guilt, realising that Chris will probably say that Cameron had me bumped orf in a false flag attack.

Nominated by: Chris Spivey’s Mum