Whatever it is – Masterchef, Who do you Think You Are (a famous cunt), the Repair shop, The Voice or some Simon Cowell-led twatfest, there’s always a soboy cunt tearing up to soppy plinky plonk music.
Home improvement programs are no better. The ronseal-coated reality TV epsilon minuses are at it as well.
Stop crying and sharing your mental fragility, you tedious, unstable cunts. In my day the only people crying on TV were usually victims of sexual abuse in shadow or starving Ethiopians.
I blame Diana syndrome and that psycho Blair.
Nominated by: Cuntamus Prime
I don’t watch soap operas and I don’t watch reality TV so thankfully I don’t have to tolerate this faux overemotional nonsense.
Occasionally there is a story on the news where genuine tears are shed, depending on the reason why I can feel some empathy.
5
They love a good cry on telly!
Thing is it never seems sincere?
Dab at eyes, look at camera .
If someone is really crying their voice keeps cracking, changing pitch,
Snot bubbles as they blub.
This is TV crying,
Because plastic surgery effects the tearducts,,
In reality celebrities cry through the soles of their feet.
Hence the term,
Feeling it in my soul.
12
What part of
are you struggling with now?
I am indeedtired; I forgot the “/” switch after my blockquote command.
I admit to (and apologise for) an element of sneering derision in my “double-irony¹”, but to sarcasm never.
¹ it actually was a kind of irony, but paradoxically, (perhaps not) you clearly failed to get it with your initial, rapier riposte. Certainly your wit wouldn’t challenge a shrew’s brain for occupation (now that metaphor is a touch acerbic. Or is it just boring old bathos?)
Oops, over and out!
1
You¹’re on fire today. I shall desist from any potentially mutually embarrassing invective² but I must say you really are becoming the proverbial fissured 78RPM shellac side of incisive, Sean; you’ve already informed us of your antipathy to “soap opera”, much to universal fascination, I’ll be bound.
¹ sadly, English does not show plurality in the personal pronoun. Fuck’s sakes, MNC: go for a walk, and don’t forget your Gannex™!
² not because it wouldn’t be a walk over, mind you, old fruit; I’m tired, slightly annoyed, work is more of a drag than you are unfunny – and it’s still fkn Wednesday.
Suffice to say however, albeit with a modicum of irony, I could only dream that more prosecution barristers had your stellar, stylish and frankly spectacular levels of sheer articulacy and wit.
E&OE
2
Are you sure it’s not you on trial for crimes against being interesting?
On the subject of irony, I think it’s deliciously ironic, in a Nom about crying on TV, that after reading your reply I am now (almost) bored to tears.
As an aside, I am beginning to enjoy your daily Court musings and will admit to being a little bit curious to see how it all pans out. Rumpole you certainly are not, however in a way congrats, CS, you evil genius.
5
As do I; you simply didn’t get the double-irony in the above. Where I said:
Double irony? You must be tired old boy, what you are alluding to is sarcasm not irony.
You really must try harder or get an early night as by the looks of things those criminals you mention would certainly be better off representing themselves if this is your A game.
2
For fuck’s sake, where have these pompous cunts crawled from under?
32
Ending a sentence with one preposition is a solecism, Cuntstable, and to end with two is surely a crime. Vainglorious you often veer towards, but not outright pomposity as such, fortunately. Examples of this are available on request and should be made, in the first instance, to:
K Knowles
Dunroamin
TWATT
KW17 2LN
NB the zolpidem tartrate is kicking in now, so rather as Stuart Hall, I bid you a fond farewell. This is proving to be a trying week.
1
Soft as shite.
Grow up you bawling bitches – don’t make me come over there..
8
Paul Merson is the worst for this.
He looks and acts like the crying bloke off the Ant Hill Mob.
I recall Sky doing a campaign on male mental health with Prince Baldy. I said to the Mrs, ‘Give it ten minutes and I bet we see Paul Merson crying.’
Sure enough, he appears with a few ex pros around s table (‘There he is!’- I recall saying at the time) who had ‘ishoos’ and he was the one who started blubbing almost instantly trying to get all of the attention.
I think all this ‘blubbing’ about his ishoos has kept him in his cushy job at the woke Sky Sports, because he’s not a very good pundit. Never has been.
Man up you soft cunt.
8
The emotionally incontinent bellends on shite like The X Factor or BGT are probably the worst. Full of ‘creative types’ and unstable women who will blub like a prom queen over some cunts contrived sob story.
8
They’re dreaming of their future millions by imagining granny on the mortuary slab. These are the same mooks whom you met throughout September 1997 that were gobsmacked you weren’t gushing like a mourner because some big-nosed slapper had dropped her last pair of knickers.
9
I cried when I saw the fucking state of that beautiful Mercedes Benz in the tunnel.
8
Oh yes – I remember getting “looks” of people when I wasn’t wailing and gnashing my teeth and told them it was all pathetic.
9
Me and the cat watched Cinderella on Sunday afternoon and had a good cry 😭
6
With you all the way on this one Cuntamus.
For those that have not seen a more fucking nauseating and cringeworthy spectacle on TV, here it is again.
https://youtu.be/Nuh-zzRAuS4
This odious wannabe prick clearly devoid of pride or self respect, not to mention talent.
I hate him, or whatever the cunt is.
11
Wish I was back in the 70’s. I had a mate from Swindon who called everybody CUNTIE. He wouldn’t have put up with this shit. Hey cuntie you fucking cunt, fuck off.
6
I often wonder if the Ruskies had access to British TV what they would make of us.
As almost everyone on TV these days seems to be homos3xual, passionately woke, female, disabled, of colour and often not from these shores.
Top programmes include cake baking, dancing, family quiz or game shows hosted by either gays or midgets with fucking morons as contestants, talentless cunts in talent shows, dreary, tedious soaps with D list “actors”, fucking lefty do good libtard whingers bleating on about racial inequality, British reality programmes depicting the fucking scum that live here and benefit cheats, and finally not forgetting imported garbage such as Ellen Degeneres or RuPaul Drag Race.
Has anyone on ISAC had the misfortune of accidentally watching RuPaul Drag Race for anything more than 5 seconds? If you haven’t, I wouldn’t recommend it.
Reckon the Russians could start off in the morning, well and truly kick the living shit out of this country and be home in time for tea.
10
Access to it! Putin probably streams it to the whole population as the best propaganda against the West known to man, Willie.
5
Willie, that list almost perfectly describes the shiver looking for a spine to crawl up that is Strayan TV.
It’s frightfully bad over here too, I can only bear to tune in to watch old movies like the Dam Busters which at least relates to happier times and values I can relate to.
Anything post 90s turns my piss to fucking lava.
1
That link should’ve come with a ‘view discretion advised’ warning. Only in modern Britain can that kind of made for TV faux emotional nonsense be accepted as normal behaviour!
5
Isn’t that the same cunt on that car advert ?
4
Ah, Rylan before he managed to pilfer Dick Emery’s old vicar’s teeth from the BBC props box. I thought at the start of the clip he was trying to get into Nicole’s knickers. I would have given him kudos for a slight weepiness to get her juices flowing.
But given he is infested with terminal Gayness, it didn’t happen. He was overcome with rampant hom0sexualings and fell to his knees (standard issue position for a cocknosh).
10
Did someone die?
What a fucking pansy…
5
Pansy….hahaha. That word probably sums that type up better than any other.
6
At over two minutes I dare not subject myself to the agonising anticipation of when the snot begins to bubble. So I pulled out six seconds in.
1
You did better than I did, TS. I didn’t even watch it, I just saw the name Rylan pop up and turned it off.
2
Bleugh!
That’s the sort of entertainment Aldous Huxley was writing about, although Rylan has the looks and name of a gay android being made to feel ‘despair’.
We’re definitely living in the future.
3
Nothing ever made me feel so ashamed of being Aussie as when Steve Smith and Dave Warner bawled their eyes out when caught cheating.
Very fucking poor form!
And that traitor cunt Bob Hawke, it’s your fault you were a shite father and your daughter became a smackhead.
17
Indeed that was a low point.I assumed someone had watered the VB down.
5
A-fucking-men. Smiths confected blobbing was so humiliating to us, to be associated with that crybaby cunt by the fact we live in the same desert continent.
The stupid twatt got sprung cheating red handed and the only honourable course of action was immediate self-banishment from the game and from the media.
2
Although the sight of hundreds of England fans wearing Smith’s crying face as a mask and constantly singing ‘Cry in a minute, he’s gonna cry in a minute’ gave me some amusement.
Well, until the cunt remained at the crease for about 2 or 3 days every time he played that is.
Yes, his, the media’s and politicians’ reaction to the whole thing was completely over the top.
0
You’re an Aussie? If you see my bogan relatives say ‘hi’. There should be about twenty-thousand of the cunts by now.
Most of them look like Toadfish Rebecchi from Neighbours.
The women more so.
0
Only time I cried was when I got kicked in the cock.
9
I bawl like a cunt every time I turn on the telly and see all the shite we’re served up.
11
An excellent cure for all this emotional mess is a good drying out in the oven.
5
Telly made me cry last Saturday. Just before match of the day I nodded off and dreamt that Gary Linekunt had left and had been replaced by Des Lynam. Imagine how upsetting it was to wake up 10 minutes later to see my dreams shattered!
Seriously though, this blubbing has got out of control. To think that a BBC program like the repair shop would deem it a requirement to have a sob story would have been unthinkable not so long ago.
Maybe those handing over they’re prized possessions are overcome with emotion at the realisation that they left a treasured family heirloom in the same building as a dark key and still got it back!
11
It does make you wonder about all these treasured and irreplaceable family objects, so precious that some old Doris left it rusting in the shed for forty years.
4
Contrived bollocks, just like the DOB stories I’ll wager.
2
Sob stories. Fucking phone!
2
I even seen this happen on Dragons’ Den of all places.
An entrepreneur suddenly turns into a cry baby during a presentation because they suffered some hardships in the process of creating their marvelous invention. Well, that’s life for you.
Trouble is this device so often works in getting the sympathy vote and a positive result which should have nothing to do with a back story. Even hard-nosed business type fall for it not just wanky judges on X Factor.
Isn’t this just another symptom of tiresome snowflakery?
7
Yes this one trick pony has ruined drama. Every drama,TV series features some twat dissolving into tears because it’s the only trick they have. That together with whispering to appear more dramatic. It’s not, it’s cliched ,unimaginative and tedious now fuck off.
3
What the fuck happened to good old British stiff upper lip and stoicism? How the fuck did we as a nation make it through the last year amazes me. In twenty years time, the world will be run by millennials, and if we haven’t already gone up in smoke, it will definitely be the end.
8
Men dont cry. Only poofy cunts cry. If you think a tear is coming out for say Tigger in Winnie the Pooh you leave the room. Never ever show your a twat, it only encourages the children to think your a twat if you have brought them up right.
6
it’s about time Disney put Tigger warnings on Winnie the Pooh….
3
The coming economic crash and being conscripted in the war with China will sort out the millenials.
Toughen then up, boiling their boots for dinner,
Bayoneting the yellowbellies.
Im optimistic!👍
8
They will start crying long before then Miserable, blocking 5G signal and using the wrong gender pronouns will see off about half of them.
6
Oh yeah LL the body count will be massive!
A lot will try to surrender using upspeak,
“We, like, surrender?”
But the lack of phone signal,
No faketan, and no gender neutral uniforms will make them snap!!
Make lions of em!
“We’ll like, kill every last one of you!
CHARGE??
6
Love your stuff miserable, you paint many pithy pictures with a few sharp phrases.
Enough to boil my pith
3
When the DIY SOS crew of cunts turn a 2up 2down into a fucking modern mansion for some sooty or peaceful with a sob story, you are guaranteed to see enough tears to wash Miserables sizeable van.😢😢😢😂
A more suitable ending would be the lady of the house gobbling off Nick Knowles in gratitude, whilst that shortarse sparks “Billy” gets caught wanking into the daughters soiled panties😁
Now that would be entertaining 😀👍
14
Bloody hell General, MNC is probably being rushed into A&E, you can’t say things like that 😂
7
PS, ‘wanking into the daughters soiled panties’ hilarious 👍
7
Boo hook.Diddums.Soft as shite.
2
Stupid bloody keyboard!!Boo hoo!!!!
4
It’s even on sports channels.
Paul fucking Merson. What a big girl of a cunt.
4
Who the fuck watches TV these days. Feckin idiot lantern.
5
i would love to contribute here but i just can’t stop crying – i’m sorry – you see when i was a lad i grew up …… no no , i can;t ………
3
who’s been chopping fuckin’ onions on here – come on, own up you cunt?????
3
Always found this a bit weird.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6a_PRcVYX7g
2
It’s a lot weird
2
Well Mr Stroker, I do watch Russian telly and they are laughing at the West. Regular comments like ‘what next’. The upper hand is being given to them and they don’t have to do anything, just wait for the West to get weaker and implode.
The Ruskies openly state that most Western govenments are now incompetent and what is so disturbing is they are actually telling the truth without a spin on it.
So sad to see what generations of hard working people built including the internet for these Woke Snowflakes to destroy. Yep, the West is becomming a joke!
4
Only crying from a bloke on telly that was ever acceptable was Bobby Charlton when we did Real Madrid in the 1968 European Cup semi final. He was thinking of his mates who would have played, but for the air crash.
All these modern pooves, opportunists, narcissists and show offs can fuck off.
5
Let them see if turning on the tears works on Klaus Schwab and his ‘Great Oven-Off’.
2
The worst example I have seen recently was a Democrat cunt called Rashida Tlaib, who had a full on hysterical meltdown over giving an account about the Capitol Hill riot.
It didn’t matter she wasn’t present in the Capitol, I think she wasn’t even in Washington DC, but somehow it was all about her. AOC was there like a fly on shit, offering a shoulder to blub on.
4
Ah, well AOC would have been there LL. Recently in an emotional TV interview AOC revealed that she had been the subject of historical abuse. She didn’t allude to what sort of abuse or from whom. What she did reveal was when she locked herself in a room in capital hill and was ‘scared for her life’ it was like been abused all over again. Also some of the Republicans that have raised an eyebrow to her likening her been scared to being abused are abuse enablers. So basically what she is saying is if you don’t agree with her you are in abuse enabler. How fucking low can you go to try and get your own way and get people to feel sorry for you.
Remember Blasey Ford? Same dirty Democrat tactic to try and stop Brett Kavanaugh being appointed to the supreme court
2
Oh yeah, didn’t she have selective amnesia about a sex assault for thirty years?
2
Strangely enough she did. However as soon as Brett Kavanagh was nominated to the Supreme Court, which would tip the balance in the conservatives favour 5-4, she miraculously remembered.
There is little lower than a desperate Democrat.
4