The Safety Camera Partnership

A monumental cunting for these modern day highwaymen please.

A few years ago Bristol City Cuntcil in their infinite wisdom decided to drop the speed limit to 20mph across vast tracts of the city. This cost millions of quid. The reason being that as 30mph is the default speed limit for a built up area it doesn’t need repeater signs putting up whereas 20mph does. This was done on wide open main roads as well as residential side roads.

The new mayor promised to review some of the more ridiculous 20 zones but 2 years on nothing has been done. He’s probably too busy trying to erase Edward Colston’s name from the city. They’re even going to rename Colston Hall. My suggestion would be “Cunts own” Hall. Any ideas guys? Answers on a postcard to BCC. Anyway, I digress.

So, how to pay for all this expensive extra signage? I know, speed camera vans! Now don’t get me wrong, I’m all for road safety. If they situated their vans at accident blackspots I would be applauding them.

But they don’t because they know they wouldn’t make any money. Instead they put them on main roads that would be totally safe to do 30mph. The only way to keep at 20mph is to keep staring at the speedometer which is in itself inherently dangerous. It’s also bad for the environment as lower gears use more fuel. It also encourages people to dangerously overtake. Bad news on a number of levels. To make matters worse they like to hide around bends and at the bottom of hills.

These cunts are contributing nothing whatsoever to road safety, they are merely stitching up everyday people going about their business. It’s legalised corruption and it makes my fucking piss boil. I’ve yet to be caught by one of these cunts but it’s probably only a matter of time. If I ever do have to go on a “speed awareness course” I shall give these cunts a piece of my mind, make no mistake.

Nominated by: Cupid Stunt 

40 thoughts on “The Safety Camera Partnership

  1. This increased level of surveillance will mean nothing to a generation for whom ‘Big Brother’ means nothing more than a television show.

  2. Great cunting, I fucking detest these cunts too at the moment, having just acquired 3 points and 100pounds fine for speeding on M1 southbound in my truck , fully loaded downhill no warning , rolling roadworks , sign on overhead gantry said 40 I started to slow then on the hardshoulder a 50 sign then back to 40 as soon as I passed the first gantry flash, Bastard’s My own fault trust no cunt and no fucking sign’s

  3. This twenty is plenty nonsense has spread like a cancer with the lefty councils. I could go faster on a bicycle. I would love to see one of these hateful. risk averse, anti-car, 20 is plenty councillors mashed by a speeding cyclist, with tread marks left all over their annoying faces.

    As Transport Minister, I would get rid of this 20 mph limit, get rid of speed bumps, increase the motorway limit to 80mph and sort out the traffic light phasing in every city and get rid of all the signage clutter. I would also instate driver re-testing (practical and theory test) every 7 years because people become complacent bastards in their cars. Obviously I would invest heavily in improving the train network so you might tempted to take one, instead of being put off by endless delays and cancellations at rip off prices.

    Thank you and good morning.

    • Councils love this shite
      Why theres gridlock at rush hour across the UK.
      Fully loaded up going into Holmes Chapel other day drops from 60mph to 30mph and camera there,
      Didnt get me but bet it gets quite a few!!
      Sly fuckers.
      No warning or anything just a speed trap to finance the cunts at motorists expense.

      • You can have a top job in my Transport Ministry, MNC. Of course we need to get rid of these money stealing Gatsos , evil average speed cameras, hand held bloody laser cameras etc etc.

        Too much effort spent on catching motorists go a few miles over the limit, not enough spent on pot holes and driving standards.

      • Morning!
        Cheers Cuntologist, yes potholes dont know about where you are but some roads are like the 3rd world theyre that bad!
        Although to be fair at the moment seems every roads up for resurfacing?
        Ps
        Just walked the dog before im out on a removal, found a pair of Ray-ban sunglasses on the verge, Googled them..£75!!
        And found a crisp new tenner last week!😁👍👍

    • Nobody pays any attention to Twenty is Plenty anyway (certainly not in a spa town in the South East of England), indeed since lockdown its got worse. For example, only this week, I was walking to my car and coming up the road at clearly more than 20 was some cunt. I continued walking diagonally across the road thinking he’d slow down. Quite the opposite, the cunt sped up (but typically didnt take up my invitation to stop and discuss). I have the reg, seen the car around, so only a matter of time before it is introduced to my hammer. Wot larks, Pip.

  4. Currently driving up to kelso to do a drop, on my 5th night out this week , working on a Saturday to pay for a speeding fine, it’s because I’m white I know it is, in a White truck, if it had been a dark coloured truck it wouldn’t of flashed , raciest cameras

  5. Cameras have no latitude. On an advanced motorcycle riding course run by Gloucestershire Plod 20 plus years ago I recall the copper leading the course saying that he lads would not nick you for doing 90 on the M5 if it were deserted on a perfect summer day at 5am . However, going past a primary school at opening or chucking out time on a rainy day would earn you a pull if you were riding at 29 mph in a 30 zone. No prosecution but a chat pointing out the risks.

  6. Twenty?!?! …. might as well fucking walk, or get a horse and cart. Anything but cycling.
    I’d rather sit on a wooden cart, constantly bombarded with horse farts than become one of those lycra-clad cretins.
    Do the cyclists stick to the 20mph limit? Bet they fucking don’t, and I bet no cunt gives them a ticket either…. man I fucking hate leftists so much!

    • I followed a cyclist on Thursday-quiet country lane, twisty and difficult to overtake, his average speed 39mph-pretty impressive.
      We came into a village I know has a 30, reducing to 20 limit and is regularly peopled with old paedo-cunts with a speed gun-he didn’t slow down at all and pulled away.

      Re the next: I suspect that in the not too distant future, all motor vehicles will be constantly monitored by our ever more intrusive big-brothers in Cuntminster.👎

    • I fkin don’t DTS! 😄
      So funny cruising by Mr angry cuckold businessman in his traffic marooned Range Rover!
      Less edifying watching the cycling chav twats who ride on pavements, jump red lights, weave all over the road and ride three abreast not letting traffic by – not a single one splattered despite me helpfully offering to boot them under a lorrys wheels! (on, ahem, a number of occasions!).
      Bike riders should have to legally undergo safe cycling courses before being allowed on the road, and as a road vehicle user they should comply with road traffic regulations – far too many are selfish irritating dangerous idiots.
      Speed cameras eh? I always wondered what kind of idiot would paint a money box yellow!

  7. It’s all bollocks, road safety? Take away the hard shoulder on motorways, strike of genius that, who could of seen a problem?

    No long term planning, no ongoing investment on infrastructure, ever expanding population and not one fuck given for citizens who have to use congested shit roads through need not choice.

  8. They are absolute robbing, vile cunts. As you say, they park their vans in places they KNOW they’ll catch you, outside a school that’s on a hill, on a Saturday or Sunday but never when the school is ‘in session’, in ridiculous 20 MPH zones on a road wide enough to land a 747 on. Fucking parasites. Absolute fucking parasites. Speeding is the most minor cause of accidents, and that is backed up by statistics, but, it’s the most lucrative so the cunt-bubbles focus on that. Every copper I know loathes them, too! And don’t get me started on the ‘Community Speedwatch’ motherfuckers. Finger-wagging busybodies who should fuck off and pick up litter if they want to make themselves useful.

    • And another thing, speed bumps are absolute cunts. Personally, I’d like to get the cunts that authorise this fuck-up, give them a spinal injury, or a NOF, stick the cunts in the back of my ambulance, withhold pain relief and drive them around, primarily over speed bumps. Then let’s hear the smug, lefty cycling cunts thoughts about them, then.

      • Some are much steeper than others DCI , not so much a bump as a short drop.
        Great when youve someone in the back having a heart attack eh?
        Morning

      • Certainly don’t help with a smooth drive, MNC, which is sometimes vital.

        Morning.

  9. Reassuring to know that there is so little real crime about, that Plod can park up in a van and simply wait for the “crimes” to come to them.

    Makes no difference how safely you drive, the more often you’re on the road, the greater chance you’ll be nobbled by one of these cunts… Kerching !!

      • Maybe not DCI – but it’s Plod that sends you the notice of intention to prosecute !!

      • Based on evidence collected by a civilian. Funny how they’re not so keen to prosecute some cunt caught stealing, say a car, based on absolutely clear CCTV footage sent to them by another civilian.

  10. Good Morning

    I live in a county that use to be the speed camera capital of the U.K. but in 2010 they got rid of all the static cameras as they weren’t making any money. They have kept a two or three of the mobile ones. Of course about 400 yards after leaving the county on The A14 there is one that actually works and it did me at 5 in the morning at 80 mph.
    I have been on a number of speed awareness courses over the years and at first I came out with a more positive view of speed cameras, as accident prevention devices rather than revenue raisers. That view has now been reversed as councils become ever more avaricious.
    I see the M1 has a 60 limit, instead of 50, through the roadworks around Newport Pagnell that is a good thing but so called smart motorways need a cunting all of their own. A continuous presence of Big Brother but no bloody hard shoulder. The most frightened I have been was about 6 months ago when I had switched the engine off in a jam on the A14 and the car wouldn’t restart and I was in the outside lane. I am not sure how I and the dogs are still here.

    • The thing with speed cameras is, most people slow down to the required speed just long enough to get over the index lines, and then revert back to whatever speed they were doing. This, in itself, could cause more accidents if the cunt behind is daydreaming and doesnt slow when the car in front does, usually quite suddenly.

  11. Been caught speeding in Bristol when the useless backward council decided to put a temporary average speed camera on the M32.
    Had to go on a speed awarenesses course to avoid points on the licence.
    Some ex copper types talking strutting abaaaaaht talking down to the grown ups like we were at school…some old cunts phone went off and they threatened to chuck him aaaaht, to be fair to the old cunt I doubt if he knew what a mobile phone was let alone the fact he had one.
    The cunts didn’t like it when I asked why the roads are in such a state, and why they sell fast cars it’s exciting to drive fast.
    Seen these vans with the camera set up catching people all day…cunts.
    When the automated cars come in (not that I’ll get in one) the whole rip off insurance cartel’s and speeding fines will hopefully be a thing of the past as you are technically not in control of the vehicle, although I’m sure they’ll find a way to scrounge more money off us.
    The motorists future looks shite…electric cars, 50mph limit or less on the motorway’s, cameras everywhere and the worry that the Russians will hack into your cars driverless technology, lock your doors and drive you off a cliff or make you run over Mavis whilst she is shopping.
    This country is finished ©️ Ruff Tuff Creampuff.
    Go fuck yourselves.

  12. Slightly off topic…
    In these 50mph zones that drag on and on (where the lazy road worker cunts stand abaaaaht on their phones all day) why are lorries allowed to fly through blatantly going 55mph+ ?
    I’ve been sat in the motor plodding along at 50mph and some lorry driving cunts tried intimidating me or overtakes me.
    Then the cunts try overtaking fellow lorry driving cunt and daaahn the road and cause a mile traffic jam on the motorway…the cunts.
    Go fuck yourselves.

    • Came back from Cornwall yesterday. The usual 5 hour to Derbyshire took 9 hours; some cunt threw themselves off a bridge so the A30 was closed. M5 had miles of 50 mph coned road works; no one working at 2.15 on a Friday!

      • What a cunt that person was Gizziguy…not only making some poor cunts have to clean up his/her dead body but also causing mass inconvenience for the masses. As for the road ‘workers’ they would have pissed off after lunch on a Friday…yet paid for the whole day if course. The cunts. 😁

  13. Got 9 points and 3 x £100 fines in the last 10 years. I took them all on the chin as I couldn’t face going on their poncy course.

    The most recent one was a mobile camera that got me at 7am on a Sunday morning taking in-laws to the airport. The road was deserted.

    I hope they feel good about themselves at the end of a day’s work.

  14. My advice is to use a decent motoring offence lawyer if you think you’re in the right.

    Plod and the safety camera partnershits will use every threat in their arsenal to get you to back down, but just let the lawyer deal with it.

    I won my case as the judge decided it was not in the public interest to protecute the morning of the trial.

    Costs reimburshed and plod left red faced for persuing it when they knew they didn’t have a case.

  15. I must admit I am guilty of banging my truck on cruise at 50 in a 50 average zone try keeping your foot on the accelerator for 9hrs a day,if I get within tonguing distance of somebody’s backend , then fucking move over and stop pissing aabbbbbattt especially that bawc,.

  16. Driving on British motorways is really frustrating these days. The legal speed is set so low so that stupid people can use them. British learner drivers should be made to have an hour on a German auto bahn. Natural selection would ensure that those too gormless to have a licence would soon be having their corpses cut out of car wrecks.

  17. My small town has recently developed a crew of busybody speed n_zis who put on hi-vis jackets and stand around with speed guns waiting for the inevitable dooshka spinning his wheels as he emerges from the tight bend at the church. Not that they can do anything about the cunt, he’s away over the horizon. They have erected a dozen or more signs imploring drivers not to exceed the 30 and 20 limits: these are situated with some precision where pedestrians try to cross the street, thereby distracting the harassed driver at the exact moment of Granny’s attempt to reach Boots. Given that the principal obstacle to crossing the street is usually a mile-long nose-to-tail queue behind Fiddler’s cousin’s tractor, the n_zis’ assertion that speeding endangers local pedestrians is largely without foundation.
    No, I don’t think racing through a town with sinuous streets and lethal junctions is a particularly good idea. But neither is perpetually nagging the innocent driver, who, in my case, tends to react by giving it the beans as he passes a huddle of selfrighteous fluorescent n_zis who would like to be traffic cops but lack the necessary humanity and tact (joke).

  18. True story – we had to go to a little village in rural Norfolk as the local councillor and residents were fed up with speeding cars “going at breakneck speeds” one cunt said.
    We took the speed gun out and positioned ourselves at said point where the action happens.
    Two coppers and three residents in their hi-vis. Highly visible from about 100 yards away.
    We were there 2 hours and caught only 1 person doing 45 in the 30 limit and who do you think we caught speeding? Only the councillor who fucking made the complaint!!!!
    My sergeant wasn’t impressed and ripped him a new one for wasting police time and gave him 3 points which he contested in the magistrate court and lost. What a cunt. Didn’t get re-elected either if memory serves me right.
    As we told the residents when you are up close to moving cars especially on little country roads the speed can look a lot more than what they are doing.

  19. I work in the industry and know the reasons why a lot of cameras are installed. Whilst I agree with a lot of the speed cameras at accident black spots, I hate the variable speed limit and yellow box cameras. Utter pointless and only designed to print money.
    20mph zones around schools are a good idea. 20mph anywhere else, utter cunting pointless pain in the arse.
    Cycle lanes are another cunting idea. Narrowing the road down and slowing down fucking everyone for two fucking cyclists that may use it twice a week. Add to that cyclists that jump the lights, nearly flattened three of these cunts in the last two weeks, and cyclists and electric scooters whizzing around on the pavement are 20mph, I seem to be driving around feeling like Michael Douglas in Falling Down.

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