Nomination Hijacking

Nomination Hijackers are cunts. You know who you are.
Like the PLO or Libyan terrorists these cunts have no respect for anyone else on the flight. We all hoped we were going to Alicante…but no we’re fucking not, we’re all off to Tripoli whether we like it or not!
Cunts.

So it is with Nomination Hijackers on ISAC. Some thoughtful and diligent soul takes time to write up and nominate an epically cuntworthy subject, something which Admin (bless’em) might or might not approve, only to find when it is chosen that three replies in that some other cunt has barged in unannounced with their own off-topic cuntfuckery, not a reply at all. Fuck off, cunt!

What they are actually saying is Fuck the nomination process, I’m so important and what I’ve got to say is so important that I can just bypass the official selection process to inflict my brain-bleed on everyone else even if it’s poorly thought-out, humourless tripe and nothing to do with the nom.

To those cunts tough shit if it didn’t make the grade as a nom first time round. It’s probably fucking terrible anyway.
Apart from the total Nom hijack, other lesser hijackings are comments like, ‘I hope City… United… Cuntsville Rangers win tonight.’ Or
‘Hello again, Mr Cunt. Mrs X and me shared a lovely sausage sandwich.’

I don’t care. Find each other on Twatter or Cuntbook or at your local dogging spot, I don’t fucking want to know. Fuck off, cunts.

Nominated by zippy

102 thoughts on “Nomination Hijacking

  1. That cocaine taking twat, Michael Gove, is a right cunt, isn’t he. I believe he’s also a left cunt and a middle cunt too. But what else did you expect, Zippy?

  2. I think one of the worst examples I saw was someone only a few weeks ago barging in on the very first comment with a lengthy change of subject.

    I guess finding a group of like-minded folks who are as disillusioned with modern life as we all are inherently fosters a desire to chat and chew over current events; hence the sometimes rather direct detours from the topic at hand.

    Sometimes breaking news warrants a bit of an interruption, which I myself do from time to time and my apologies for being a cunt for that.

    I do agree though, that someone steaming in with an unrelated nomination-tier scribing early doors on a tabled topic is a bit cuntly.

  3. Oh and well done to the Admin for the return of the big red “Cunt” button. Not sure what happened to it in the first place, although I would guess Admin got pissed one night and started playing with the admin controls and fucked something up.

    good old Admin – a cunt to the last 🙂

    • It was removed due to legal reasons, a former member of the forum working at a nuclear facility mistook the cunt me button for the emergency stop switch when he was pissed.
      Both employer, employee and the site have agreed this never happened but the Cunt me button was removed as a safety precaution.
      at your request it has been reinstated.

  4. Can’t say it’s ever really bothered me but I’m probably the cunt doing it, so I’ve never noticed.

    On a separate note…..
    Anybody else read the gulag archipelago? …. what a book!

  5. Nurse Ratched! Are you listening to me Nurse Ratched??
    What gives you the damned right to keep our cigarettes piled up on your damned desk?

    Piss on your fucking rules Nurse Ratched!!
    I WANT MY CIGARETTES!!!!

    • Afternoon, Ruffy.

      There’s one of these every few weeks now. Don’t be unkind, don’t talk about Brexit, don’t mention the World Cup, don’t talk about the Champions League, don’t say naughty things about Jëws/Muzzues/Catholics/other cretins, don’t interrupt, don’t do that.

      It’s like IAC having its time of the month.

  6. Isnt diversity what we are all about!

    Hijacking is to take by force, and, why introduce twitter, I am deeply offended twitter is for cunts!

  7. I’ve got no issues with nomination derailing just as long as it’s not about football. But I’m not that entitled to think that I can just guilt people into stopping.

  8. Very valid cunting Zippy and agreed.

    ‘Sorry to go off tack here, but….’ and
    ‘I know it is off topic and sorry, but’……

    NO YOU’RE FUCKING NOT SORRY. If you were, you would save it for your own nom, cunt!

    Fucking annoying when you agree with a good nom and are having a scroll through reading all of the brill, funny comments and some cunt goes off on a tangent.

    Boils my piss. But then everything boils my piss these days, especially today as I have fucking excruciating coccyx pain which is doing my nut in, plus I am a grade A, miserable cunt anyway…..and it’s still fucking raining.

    Now where is that bastard Ibuprofen?

    • Ibuprofen?? No feckin use at all, according to John Reginald Christie, who was on the box last night.
      “It’s what we in the profession call a ‘syndrome’.”…
      Hope the pain subsides soon, but not in a “Christie done it” sort of way, obviously.

      • Indeed.

        Gassing myself into unconsciousness and having some random strangle me isn’t QUITE the way I wanted to get rid of the pain.

        Though with this shit arse world lately it is most tempting….

  9. Wimminz World Cup
    USA 13 Thailand 0
    What a fucking farce.
    They’ll have to let them play the ladyboys next time.

    Me ruv you rong time. Me sucky sucky. Onry twenty dorra.

        • Thailand only lost because every time they heard the whistle and the referee shout “Handball” the Ladyboys would get excited.

    • What really fucks me off is that in the name of equality THAT is now a world cup result. So Scotland men could hammer Brazil 12-0 and it would be eclipsed by this farce that is wimminz football into obscurity in the records.

      Let the rug-munchers have to qualify against an under-16 boys team so all the cunts get knocked out and the piss-taking tit-show cancelled before it begins.

  10. Nom hijacking, is just a fact of life. Nothing is perfect. I suppose the mods could step in and delete anything that is not relevant, but that would be a ball-ache, and would probably prevent the mods from getting on what they usually do – play computer games, check out the porn sites and drink huge quantities of beer.

    ISAC has been ticking over nicely for donkey’s years; and for me it is still one of the best sites out there for venting shit, even if hijackers come round and take a particular cunting down a different road – it’s a cunt but not quite the end of the world.

    • The code of moderation is there for legal reasons, we try to keep comments in line within the law, although you are all responsible for what you publish.
      Regarding drinking and moderation, The boss and I have an agreement I am timed out every day at 17.00 gmt and no longer system active (but we are legion, we are many) others will take over and shepard you through the night.
      17.00 gmt onwards is my wank and beer time!

      • You all do a fine job on this site, and I am thankful for it.

        Don’t forget though, we are in BST rather than GMT, which means your beer & wank time is an extra hour away – 30 seconds for the wank session (no doubt the Admin room is adorned with pics of Theresa May and Flabbott); and 5 hours for drinking 🙂

        Keep up the good work- whatever it is you do (sorry, am on my 6th can of San Miguel)

      • As Derek & Clive would say, a late afternoon wank.
        One is advised to steer cleer of greased-up toilet roll tubes, train sets, pictures of Clem Attlee, or any dead Popes in the immediate vicinity.

        As Titchmarsh might say (or even Charlie Dimmock), “Enjoy your waaaank!”
        And “Bottoms Up!” – for the beer, that is.

    • We rail against censorship as it is. We don’t want more of the same. However, it would be gentlemanly or ladylike to only change tack late in the nom. but it would have to be self imposed. Dick Fiddler has already covered this in his well received paper on “Etiquette for Cunters”

    • Quite right, how is it possible to control a group full of hate and loathing…. for pretty much everything!

      A cunting for cunts who act like cunts….. best one yet!!!

        • Now thats my kind of nom. I like to think I am at one bar one with all the cunts on here. Lets face it – were we to divulge our real selves I am sure the ISAC magic would turn from a golden coach into an Austin Allegro on the spot.

  11. Off topic 😀 But….

    Those cunts in Parliament are currently debating yet another motion seeking to block a No Deal WTO Brexit.

    Why bother?

    Parliament has a built in majority against Leaving on WTO terms so stop wasting our time and money you cunts and go straight to the vote and rubber stamp your treachery.

    Ken Fucking Clarke is currently prattling on, the slimy heap of snot. Bill Cash just intervened to tell him to get fucked.

    Shit – now Vince Cable’s up on his hooves! I thought he was dead? Slobbering on about Tango Man and how WTO rules don’t really exist, fiscal crisis drugs or summat…

    Now it’s Oliver Wetman. One Remoaner after another. I wonder who’s in the Speakers chair selecting those allowed to speak? Oh, surprise surprise, it’s Big John Bercunt!

    Nick Boles is up now…

    • Without a Tory quisling cull which hopefully the new PM will do and unfortunately a GE to get a majority Brexit will be blocked by those utter cunts in parliament indefinitely…….

      • Sorry to go off your topic ….

        I’m having a Halloumi sandwich with watercress and it’s magnificent.

        Afternoon, compatriots.

        • I had to do Halloumi skewers for a vegi at a barbeque once, fucking shit stuff to skewer. I ended up drilling them with my cordless drill and then sticking them on the spike.
          (top tip for budding chefs!)

          • You’re not supposed to freeze Halloumi,,my liege. Just lay it on the grill (or dry fry it in a pan).

        • I’m having a large mug of Kenco decaf, 5 McVities milk chocolate digestives, and a Granny Smith apple.

          Afternoon gents….

    • I have given up on political debate. The fact is we are never going to leave the EU. Or if we do it will be some fake bollocks to placate the Leavers, but in reality it will still be the same old same old.
      Face facts: democracy died in 2016 when we had the Referendum. Yes, the question was ill-defined, but all the same 17+ million people voted “out”, and yet it doesn’t matter anymore.

      • Brexit or No Brexit – this country is fucked!

        🎶 Turn off your mind, relax and float down stream… 🎶

  12. As dogging gets a mention in the nom, just thought I’d let everyone know all my dogging gear is currently for sale on eBay.

    No bids as off yet, but plenty of watchers….

  13. In other news, and totally off topic …
    Yes I know, I’m a cunt.
    Ebola has raised its pesky head in Uganda.
    There, that cheered you up, didn’t it ?

  14. I agree entirely and have given up reading many of the comments. I have two noms pending but of course nonentity Owen Jones needs his 12th appearance. There is a lot of great stuff on this site but it is being diluted by the hijackers.

  15. Must get to Specsavers. When I saw someone mention Nom. hijacking I thought WTF! Has Norman been kidnapped by Somali Pirates? Then I realised he’d merely been delayed after going out for a curry in Rusholme.

  16. Another example of nom hijacking is nominating something that is already on the nomination page.
    This happens all the time.
    Granted, if it’s already been processed then how would you know? But that’s not what I’m refering to.
    Anyway, this really only affects admins, but this is a great opportunity to mention that henceforth you will rarely see these noms stitched together into a mega nom. Instead I’m going to pick the one I like best and delete the others. The unlucky contestant can repeat themselves when the nom goes live.
    Sorry cunters, but these days it’s not unusual to do twenty noms a day, and GCHQ must be wondering about repeat visits to some really ‘unusual’ places in search of pics.

    • Are you getting at me Admin? It just seemed odd you mentioned this straight after my comment. I feel persecuted and shall certainly be seeking compensayshun for hurt feelings.
      Yours sincerely, Tarquin Snowflake.
      😊

      • No compensation BSC as it’s all a coincidence!
        I get to post when everybody fucks off for a minute which is not very often and random at that.

  17. Personally i find it a sign that a nomination has failed to catch the imagination of fellow cunters and they’d rather discuss something else.

    I dont really take anything that is written on the internet to heart, which is perhaps why i repeatedly got locked out of my Facebook account and shadow-banned on Twitter.

    Perhaps its for the best, as each platform adds more and more parameters to its offensive speech algorithms. Thomas Jefferson is a far-right cunt for mentioning Indian Savages in the declaration of independence, and mentions of ‘SJW’and ‘MSM’ get flagged as bad content, and rap lyrics get 13 year olds taken to court.

    • “…rap lyrics get 13 year olds taken to court.”

      Atrocious. They should get the lyric writers inhumanely put down.

      #criminaliserap

  18. I arrived late at the party, fuck all left to hijack, the OP makes a valid point but as a wise man once said ‘shit appen’.

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