Olympic Breakdancing

Break dancing as an Olympic sport.
Proposed for the 2024 Olympics in Paris, some cunt has proposed this cuntish behaviour should be included.
I might have guessed the Frogs would have something to do with this stupidity.If there aren’t enough daft sports already contested, such as rhythmic gymnastics and artistic swimming.

It got me to thinking what new sports ISAC people would like to see included.
I’ll start by saying the old It’s a Knockout piano smashing contest should be bought back. Especially if a pianist such as Richard Clayderman or Gilbert O’Sullivan has to be fed through a one foot square hole along with the piano.

Nominated by Duke of Cuntshire

51 thoughts on “Olympic Breakdancing

  1. I would like to see the ’20 mile English Channel Dash’, a new water based event introduced for Paris 2024. A bit like Wacky Races on water, cultural enrichers would have to make it from Calais to Blighty using any means possible while ISAC cunters replaced the Border Force and try to stop them.

  2. I read on the BBC Sports pages a couple of days ago that there might be more female British athletes than male come the next Olympics!

    Typical BBC tick-box drivel. What next? More black, lesbo/transbender midgets than men come the 2024 Games?

    I also think all those British athletes who are remainers should not be allowed to wave the Union Flag above their heads if they win a race. Instead they should stick to the EU flag and be done with it!

    Hypocritical cunts saying they’re “proud to represent Great Britain” when it suits (getting paid a mint doing their job), but then saying “fuck the interests of the 17 million who voted leave, the EU is better for everyone!”

    The Olympics is a fucking farce anyway;they’re all on fucking drugs as well as being a bunch of cunts!

  3. How about the 1 minute honesty marathon?

    MPs/Elites/Neo-liberal fascists have to last an entire 1 minute without lying or deflecting answers to the important questions of the day.

    In a dry run one MP lasted a whole 5 seconds and she currently holds the record.

    She did however study the question for 4 seconds before responding…

  4. Or competitive eating? We have Flabbott and Eric Pickles, a sure-fire gold and silver right there. Plenty of practice troughing at the Westminster money pit for years.

    • There’s always room for a good old fashioned pie eating contest. The things you could inadvertently slip into the pies too.. a little extra cream in yours, sir? I hear they use that technique in McFlurries from time to time.

  5. Competition stabbing for our effinks? Better hold it during the day. as you won’t see much as night……

    Stabby um bongo cunts.

    • Cracking idea! To make more ‘English’ the contestants could choose which type of regional bill hook to use. Sure most would opt for the ‘Yorkshire patten’ as it has a straight blade on the back edge of the hook. Pretty sure Spear and Jackson or Bulldog would be well up for some sponsorship.

  6. Midget tossing or dwarf hurling. The individual event would take place in the hammer circle so no new facilities would be needed. Round and round and faster and faster and the dwarf hurled as far as you can.
    The team event would consist of four competitors each holding a limb. You have to toss the dwarf over a high bar. The skill here is the team must be coordinated.
    It’s tenable.

  7. I worry about get too many more competitive events going on, especially with our current crop of stabbings. Especially when you start getting *people of colour* involved, and testosterone filled wimmin which happens in so many “sports”. In these fucking violent times it might be a good idea to stop games and sports, in case it ends up in murder, mayhem, or prison as has happened to a football fan this week. My brother took going to jail really badly. He refused all offers of food and drink, spat and swore at anyone who came near him and smeared the walls with his own faeces.

    After that, we never played Monopoly again.

  8. The thirteen ministers who abstained the vote last night should be sacked, one has resigned.
    The Tory party is in chaos, a total fucking shambles.
    Never seen a more treacherous bunch.
    Good morning.

      • I’d happily pull the rope for shitstain Dominic Grieve, pleased with himself old bag of shit and wind. If I hear him say “In my judgement” once more I will throw the fucking radio out of the window. What “judgement” has the deluded, demented old motherfucker got?

  9. If breakdancing is to be in the Olympics I’d like to nominate Welly Wanging also. A true gentleman’s game.

  10. Bogsnorkelling. I think our leaders might do well at it.
    British Bulldog. I don’t think our leaders would do well at that.
    Anything involving an arena, tigers and politicians.

  11. off topic,

    Even if the 650 vote to extend article 50 and the EU agree unless there is a change to the ‘law’ we still leave on the 29th.

    Or am i wrong??

    • That is the crucial point. Angela Eagle was pecking at that with the Speaker. Can the Legislature change statute? Without Government approval? Surely only the Government/the Executive can bring forward Bills? Or can an amendment to a motion…I don’t know what I am talking about.

      • I don’t know what I am talking about.

        Obvious MP potential there.

        The EU will be secretly rubbing its hands and salivating at the prospect of a long delay in limbo while we continue to make the payments, with an indeterminate outcome. But it isn’t letting on until it’s sure other means of stalling Brexit have failed. The EU has a hell of a lot to lose from Brexit, not least in that if we get away with it, others will get out too.

        But, faint cheer, friends. No cunt can rule without the consent of the governed…

        • There is no limbo anymore Komodo the Church has said. Side point.

          I think.

          From my analysis Yvette Cooper has saved Brexit, Rees Mogg has killed it.

          • Very practical. Saves a lot of hanging around, and it’s nice to see the Church acknowledging the 21st century at last. I guess there’s a digital queuing system in place and you go straight to hell when your number appears on the board.

  12. As I have virtually totally expunged all EU related stuff and services from my life, and well before the 29th, maybe I should run for Parliament.

    I would certainly ban breakdancing and all things shite from our pleasant land.

    When interviewed last night, Chuckaduckie stated that Parliament was broken. So …. my binary sixth sense tells me it should be thrown away and replaced with a new one, like you would a toaster.

    Goodbye for now.

  13. Grooming. We could enter a few grooming teams. We have professionals teams from Rotherham Bradford and Sheffield.
    Just a thought…….

  14. Shinkicking is the best sport we have.
    Makes everything else look gay.

    Fuck brexit or whatever it is. Doesn’t exist for me.

  15. When this shit and drugsfest reaches Paris surely it will be appropriate to revive the old French sport of slaughtering the nobility. You set up a guillotine on the Place de la Concorde and the gold medal goes to the country who can lop off the heads of the most rich, snobby traitorous cunts in a week. We’ll walk away with that one as we have an endless supply.
    Other traditional French sports could be included…….getting pissed by 1pm, running away from a fight, collaborating with the enemy, getting run over by a peaceful and, of course, granny shagging.

    • Could we make that a blunt woodsaw, please? Madame Guillotine is too quick to properly entertain the crowds. I would compromise with an angle grinder, if pressed.

  16. Will the Paris Olympics shut down for lunch for 3 fucking hours every day? Will the Germans insist on the opening ceremony being held in the streets so they can march down the Champs d’Elysees? When it all grinds to halt after a couple of days, due to sheer ineptitude and excessive alcohol, will they expect us to sort it out for them again?
    More importantly, will the French women be getting their legs open for 5 Gaillouises?

  17. The historically spurious Highland games is already replete with daft events readily modified for mirth-inducing mayhem.

    Tossing the caber into a field of “kettled” *insert objectionable group here* might suitably head the billing. Side events, such as heading the shot (where the participant is first administered with PCP and codeine¹) and hammer throwing into smaller pens of offending bellends would also be popular.

    Face-jumping could be a more minor event for mass participation, where the competitors – wearing spiked running shoes – attempt to clear a river six foot wide. Although this may seem easy, it is complicated by having the “victims” pegged down horizontally on the opposite banks.

    ¹The PCP (phencylidene) would greatly increase aggression, while the codeine would attenuate the pain. Probably no need for the codeine, as this event usually fatal on the first attempt.

  18. Look like whirling dervishes to me (probably not as smart or educated though)

    Splendid idea for the 2024 olympricks.

    We could reenact the battle of Omdurman in the opening ceremony. A few maxims and the odd pith helmet. Those were the days.

  19. It’s no use slagging the French off Freddie. At least their making some kind of effort with the yellow vest movement. Yes still going on all over France though you wouldn’t know it from the MSM. The only station in Britain following it fucking Russia Today. At least they are making some sacrifice.
    What we need is Mr Fiddler to organise the peasantry of Northumbria. Armed with billhooks and pitchforks he would lead them down to the Watford Gap and there meet RT and Willie who have galvanised thousands from the towns and surrounding boroughs. While Komodo ignites revolutionary fevour in colleges universities to take control of the whole country once the parliament has been toppled.

    • You are asking the impossible of me, I fear. Revolutionary fervour in universities? They’re all aspirant globalists, tied by their student loans to a future career in management. And half of them are Chinese. I’d prefer to concentrate on ‘town’ in university towns, rather than ‘gown’. Much more latent discontent there. Colleges, maybe, although Nailcare with Reiki students might present a challenge.

    • Although I’m certainly capable of inflaming the peasantry (and everyone else,come to that), I’ve a nasty feeling that I’d have to maintain a good two mile gap between them and me. It’d be like some poor little foxy trying to stay in front of the hounds. I’m aware that several naive animal-rights plebeians lurk on this site and I feel sure that they’d be terribly upset at the thought of me being hounded and harried by some irate mob.

      Tally-Ho and Fuck Off.

      Morning All.

      • Our cunt supports joining EFTA – the Norway option. But we can’t join EFTA unless we leave the EU first. So he’s shot himself in the foot. Cunt max.

        • And joining EFTA would mean signing up to Freedom of Movement…

          Completely unacceptable to yer average Leaver I would contend.

  20. Women’s naked snooker kind of appeals to me. Must be a few players around who’d look good bending over the table.
    Politician kicking would sell a few tickets.

  21. Any shite where judges give scores is not sport.

    Whizzing as fast as possible down a sheet of ice against the clock = sport, wanky snowboard jumps to gain marks from judges does not = sport.

    Battering the shit out of opposition skaters to score a goal = sport, prancing about on skates to music to gain marks from judges does not = sport.

    Running as fast as possible round a track = (boring) sport, wriggling about on the ground to shite music, looking as if you’ve just been tasered, to gain marks from judges does not = sport.

    Diving can fuck off too.

    Basically, showing off how much of a cunt you are isn’t sport.

  22. I know shooting is an Olympic event already, but NZ look to have a promising youngster, on a video I saw today. Fucking breakdancing !!!

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