The Royal Brat Factory

Fuck me,years of inbreeding may have affected their mental capacities,but it certainly hasn’t affected their virility,more’s the shame. They breed like locusts. The latest to announce another parasite-in -waiting is The Half-Blood Half-Wit and his eye-for -the main-chance tart. Another spoiled,entitled brat who’ll expect the taxpayer to keep it for it’s entire life. I’m not even sure that coloured people and Gingers should be allowed to breed….an Uppity carrying the ginger gene can’t end well. I hope they call it Terry…Terry the Chocolate Orange.

William and that vacuous brood-mare that he married are pumping the brats out in much the same style as any other benefit-dependent,workshy bunch of Spongers. No thoughts of setting an example about the threat of overpopulation for The Royal Graspers. I don’t like the look of that lad of theirs either,looks a nasty,spoiled,lazy little bugger already.

We’ve got the Middleton woman permanently up the duff,now the Darkie woman,and it can’t be long until that pudding-faced tart who got married the other day is with whelp too. All “Royals”,all expecting to lead empty,unproductive,tax-payer funded lives of unearned indulgence and sloth.

I’d put a stop to the whole charade. Personally, after the old biddy and Prince Philip bugger off I’d like to see an end to it all,but I suppose that there is a place for a drastically slimmed-down Royal Family. Although,to be fair, they can have as big a Royal Family as they like,just as long as I’m not expected to contribute a single penny towards them. The sight of that pompous gasbag Prince Andrew announcing that his daughter’s wedding was a “private wedding” the other day nearly had me blowing a fucking gasket…if it was private,why the fuck should the taxpayer foot the bill for any part of it?

However, I digress. The Royals haven’t bred a decent ‘un in generations. The Queen’s male children are appalling, Charles’ son seems to be following the same lazy,entitled path as his father. Hewitt’s child seems to an easily led congenital idiot. Andrew’s children are,as previously discussed,fat,ugly and bone idle. Edward’s children are ,frankly,highly suspect in my eyes. I believe that a Jeremy Kyle DNA test may be in order there.

If you’re breeding horses,dogs,cattle,pigs etc., you don’t keep breeding off poor stock. You can put the finest thoroughbred mare with a donkey and all you’ll breed is a Mule. The Royals seem to believe that a drop of fresh blood will reverse the ravages of generations of inbreeding…well it fucking won’t. As is proved by the current crop of junior Royal parasites.

They should all be Jaffaed before they spread any more of their compromised DNA through the population. Now that they have moved on to breeding with Darkies,well the results could be horrific.. I foresee a tribe of benefit scrounging,,entitled,ginger- afroed,chiggun- munching Joey Deacons who have no soul…..not a pleasant thought, I’m sure you agree.

Fuck them.

Nominated by Dick Fiddler

62 thoughts on “The Royal Brat Factory

  1. Once the queen dies I’m gonna become a republican. Her and Phillip are the only Royals I have any respect for – the rest of them have completely forgotten what the purpose of being a royal is and with Charles and William up next it’s better that the monarchy dies with Liz instead of becoming an embarrassment under the idiocy of those two.

    • Same here… When Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip are gone the last traces of the Blighty we knew and loved will be gone for good… And I bet that there will be cunts already planning that -somehow, some way – Harry Hewitt and Meg O’ Marple’s coffee coloured nognig nipper will get the throne or some other top job… Then the liberal right on fuckflake diversity takeover will be complete…

    • In any given era, the Royal Family has always sought to reflect the society that chooses to bow and scrape to them. The Queen and Prince Philip were perfect… in that my parent’s generation identified with them despite being on another planet when it came to wealth and privilege. In the same way the snowflake millennials currently identify with the reflected PC libtardism of William & Ginger Nut.

      The Royals constantly reinvent themselves to suit the changing values of their fawning, sycophantic subjects.

      Guess when Charlie ascends to the throne he’ll be a bit of an oddity… an anachronism. Though cunts will still lap up his green, cranky, ‘defender of faith’ mumbo-jumbo bullshit no doubt.

      Not a fan of the monarchy myself, but better them than President Blair…

      • Prince Charles and Camilla will make a perfect pair of cunts as King and Queen Rod Hull Consort. That said, I am hoping that old Charlie lives to a ripe old age and stays throned into his 90’s as that might just see me out.

        I don’t think I could stomach that Wills twat with his fucking great bald head shining resplendently like a freshly buttered baked spud accompanied by the stick-insect clothes horse Queen Consort Kate Middleton. You can tell she craves nothing more than to be the top turnip who does nothing more than smile and shit out offspring that will suffer the same male pattern baldness as dopey bollocks Wills.

        To pinch a Dick Fiddler quote; fuck them.

        • Charlie-Boy, like Rod Hull, is partial to putting his hand up a raddled old bird…

          Camilla probably smells like a ripe old Camembert.

      • It was so funny to see that they lost to Holland the other night. Now they know what it’s like being an England fan.

  2. I don’t begrudge paying 56p a year for the endless soap-opera.

    Nonetheless, a bunch of rapacious parasites.

  3. I nominated that fucking prick Prince Williams a few weeks ago (yet to be posted) for being a gormless scrounging ridiculous turd (just like his father)- suppose this really should be extended to the whole fucking lot of them.

    Apart from the Queen and her humorous insulting husband who at least perform some duties and a modicum of value for money, expecting us peasants to pay for their expensive lifestyle and festivities (and those making a living by bowing and scraping) is outdated, obscene and a waste of taxpayers money.

    If they want a jet set lifestyle, fucking work for it.

    • I remember seeing that nomination Willie, about 2 months ago wasn’t it? It was a corker!

      Maybe the lizards got to it first…

  4. Or we could have a President and a first family? President Bliar and his first Lady Cherie or Lord President Mandelson and his Husband? Reg Dwight and Lady Furnish plus the ringlet haired pair of spunk receptacles in waiting – “their” 2 boys(?) – what a first family.
    I have been around a bit and seen everything from Dictators who cant be overthrown to despots who kill, torture and murder to keep their noses at the trough. History is literally littered with bad cunts – seriously bad cunts.
    A model on the current Russian Premier perhaps? Allegedly – at an estimate arrived at by one of his “old” friends (He doesn’t have many old friends as they don’t usually see old age) he is worth a $trillion – thats his private stash including looted treasures of undocumented Old Masters and copious amounts of gold bullion and precious rocks – how true I don’t know but after seeing Moscow blossom from Trebants and Ladas and cabbage soup to one of the most expensive and corrupt cities in the world where money is the new God – remember the owner of Chelscum Abramovich started as a diesel mechanic and flogging plastic dolls heads from his 1 roomed social housing pad in downtown Moscow – that robbing cunt has now got an apartment in the Kremlin. Now how you go from a 25 year old with not a pot to piss in to a 51 year old worth C.£14bn (and that’s after a bad decade) is not luck or hard work – its corruption on a scale we mortals don’t even grasp.
    Africa? Despots, greed and corruption.
    US? Presidents with more hanger onners than a dose of piles.
    Antipodes? Not sufficiently developed but like a yoghurt it will develop a culture.
    South America? Corruption, greed, nepotism.
    Canada? Justin – enough said.
    China? Communism – enough said
    USSR? see above but bent, corrupt and dangerous
    Rump Europe? EU – more than enough said.
    For me – Liz and co are better than ALL of the above. I can go with the general cunting but in isolation and as long as we keep the gingers and mud coloured cunts out of the line England is just fine with what we have – the alternative is grim.
    (The opinions contained within this rant are solely the views of the author and should not be construed as an attempt to devalue the nom of Dick Fiddler)

    • Agreed Cunto

      But those royals who are paid for by the public purse should be pared down to a minimum optimal number, and only those who perform all royal duties. Certainly not every royal fucker.

      And lets face it, most royal duties would be considered a fantastic jolly by most of us. When done then off to Mustique for a “well earned” rest.

      No problem with the royal family, it is the sheer number of unproductive useless minor royals expecting to suck from the tit of us commoners that I have a problem with.

      • Agreed Willie (with a certain amount of mitigating circumstance – bear with me).
        I met Charlie when skipper of a Ton class minesweeper HMS Bronington. When I say met – I threw him a smart salute and lunched with him in the mess – not “with” him but in the same place. His crew, amongst them a rather rotund stoker thought he was the mutts nuts. No dramas at sea or when alongside. He liked a beer and was a good hand. You could say “normal”.
        Andrew was a cunt, albeit a WAFU cunt, a double cunt but he did his bit. His arsieness and cuntishness was apparent throughout his time. He piloted that chopper in the South Atlantic and no matter what anyone thinks of him I doff my cap – Nobody was 100% safe with Super Entendards and the cruise missiles they carried. The Argies were soft cunts but the AAF were more than capable of snotting an unsuspecting ship / boat / plane.
        If we all go back long enough we can find a bit of a wrong un lurking in our tree. It just so happens that Liz and co have a very traceable family tree.
        The old “civil list” is no more, only Liz and Phil benefitted from it when King Willy, who, in 1697 stopped how financing the Monarchy was done as up till that time they could nab as much as they liked and were answerable to no one.
        Liz now pays income tax and even council tax on her private properties which don’t number many. The new “allowance” or the Sovereign Support Grant. Liz gets £70m this year with half of that going to doing up Buck House – its in a bad state and they don’t own it – merely custodians unless Liebour get in then it will probably be flogged off used as a housing project for the Grenfell rent a tragedy mob.
        The result? Liz gets £70m to use on running Buck house. Last year the Crown Estates paid £329m in tax which went straight to the exchequer. Now I am no math expert but I went in the day they did addition and subtraction and I would say that’s a pretty good deal.
        I am more worried about blambos infesting my manor and the cunts in the shadows who glean much and pay little.
        I just regard the whole Royal line as a bit like Chester Zoo – at least you know they are all in one place and identifiable – even if they grunt, snort and shit all over the place.
        I have more concern that £50m is being laid aside by the NHS for “treating” the survivors of the Grenfell BBQ, a panto which will last until the nth degree of crisis lawyers and “sufferers” have long been dead.

        As for Liz being called the “Worlds richest woman” here’s a truth. Richest woman in the World? Nope
        Richest woman in the UK? Nope
        Top 100 in the World? Nope
        Top 100 in the UK? Nope
        She has just tumbled out of the top 300 of the richest in the UK – not the World – just good old Blighty.
        I have a lot more time for her than Branson and Dyson who could buy and sell her. I consider myself lucky to have her – and the rest of the apes in the zoo too 😉

        • A story does the rounds re Airmiles Andy arriving on board.
          He approached the Captain, all matey-like, and said “You can call me Andy.”
          He didn’t get the reply he expected…
          “You can call me Sir.”

  5. The alternative to the monarchy is frightening though… Where any cunt could become Britain’s head of state?…Satan Blair, Banana Gob, Branson… Or even cunts like Cowell. Rowling, Lineker, or the Beckhams…. Or imagine a nightmare scenario: the snowflake cunts in ecstasy as Britain gets its first black president, Obama style… President Stormzy anyone? Don’t bet against it…The stupidity of the British should never be underestimated…

  6. Ho ho, great(!) minds think alike, eh Mr F…I mentioned Terry’s choc orange last night after your nom was in!
    A splendid and timely cunting.

    • Evening, Mr. Cunt-Engine. There can’t be many people who when asked “Hobbies”? could truthfully answer “being spiteful”. I fear that if we were to meet up in a few years time we would be like the Old Gits.

      • Despite only being a mere whippersnapper of 46, I am like the Old Gits already, schadenfeude being the order of day.
        Do you ever wonder if you’d hate the general public of a different country? Surely they can’t all be as execrable as 98% of the “Great” British public?
        On second thoughts…

        • I have no doubt at all that I’d hate the people of any and every country. I always think when I watch one of those films where some hero saves mankind… “What a Cunt, should have left them to stew in their own juices.”

          In fact,thinking about it, I might make this the subject of my next sermon in church on Sunday.

      • Actually, if I was hiring and someone stated “being spiteful” as a personal skill on their CV, I’d hire that fucker in a second.
        Unless they were a darkie.
        Or a wimminz.

  7. By the way, it’s nice to see we’ve had quite a few new members join in the last couple of days.

  8. Princess Pippa has had a kid now. I think that her child should be next in line for the throne. Pippa is the only member of the Royal family who has enough haughty disdain for the Plebs to carry off the whole “Her Majesty” thing……Gawd bless ‘er.

    • With her arse and Gemma Arserton’s tits (see above) I think we’d have the perfect Monarch.

        • Morning Dick and apologies for missing your message last night as I got rather delayed on P’Hub

          You are absolutely right to point out the bleedin’ obvious there and correct my mistake. Pippa’s arse will have been wrecked now she’s dropped one so Gemma remains supreme.
          Great to see the legendary Rt Hon Peter Mannion in that clip….honorable mention to Tamsin Grieg too. She’s seldom in anything bad but sadly is bound to be a strident anti-Brexit libtard as required by the Job Description!

    • I hate to break it to you Dick, but Pippa is no more a member of the Royal Family than my butler, Paul Burrell.

      Sweet dreams.

  9. Not quite Royal but I see Pippa Middleton has popped out a Hooray Henry today. Marvellous news.
    Meanwhile Mavis is off to Brussels tomorrow hoping to come back with more marvellous news……” I have in my hand a piece of paper, which guarantees…..”
    More likely they will laugh in her stupid face and tell her to fuck off. Either way , we’re getting shafted.

    • Evening, Freddie. We’ve certainly not heard any more of her “No deal is better than a bad deal” lately. Apparently now it’s “A disastrous,craven sell-out is better than a bad deal or no deal at all.”

  10. Perhaps, when Her Maj and Phil the Greek have finally turned up their toes, we could eject the remaining Squarehead/kebab salesman hybrids from the civil list and install a new bloodline to The Crown.
    The House of Farage sounds good.

    “All hail King Nigel the usurper”

  11. You are a set of unfeeling cunts!

    Major James Hewitt is ecstatic about being a Grandad for the first time!

    What a buzz kill it will be for him when he comes on this site.

    I hope Harry & Megs go the whole hog on the Royal box ticking and announce the kids pronouns as: “Vee, vey and vier.” when it’s born.

    That’ll really piss Paloma “Pigeon” Faith off. She’ll be rushing to San Fransisco to get her 2yr old’s trans op in ahead of the Hewitts.

    Such a rewarding, modern society we live in, isn’t it…


    • Evening, Rebel. Hewitt can Fuck Off too. I bet he had some right juicy polaroid snaps of the Royal gob bulging…never fucking shared them round though, did he? Miserable bugger.

    • Perhaps Hewitt had a hand in Princess Di’s death, with encouragement from Phil the Greek.
      Hewitt may’ve been furious that his ginger son might have had a half peaceful half sibling…

  12. Don’t know how anyone can have anything but contempt for anyone part of the royal family. Thousands of dimwits line the streets waving flags and whooping in support of a family they believe represent our heritage in some way. Blissfully ignorant of the fact that this amazing royal family of ours would have had no hesitation in sending these peasants to the tower if they fell behind on their taxes, back in the days when the Monarchy were in charge. Never fails to amaze me how so many people claim to value our history and heritage, yet clearly know fuck all about it.

    Sooner these cunts get wiped out by a cruise missile or biological agent the better. And then the detritus of this country can move on to worshipping the next pointless non entity.

  13. The Windsors the soap opera continues or is the Saxcobas or Wales ? The family with many names and the hidden German connections but claim to be so so English laughable Keep breeding and getting them onto the civil list you Parasites fuck off and get a job a proper job

  14. So Meghan’s up the duff already, well that’s splendid news. Four months married, throw out the rubbers and the pills, time to breed. And why not? Isn’t going to cost them anything. She’s thirty seven, no time to lose, she can maybe fit four in before she’s forty. Then they can tour the world while hired nannies look after the screaming twats. Who was it who said “There’s no such thing as a free lunch”?

    • I recon it could be called “Winston” or “Kanye” . Future TWOC’er, or Dealer

    • Not sure, she that cunt waffle from Cambridge who took a snowflake dump on our armed forces?

  15. Yup, Swain is an orthodontically wayward ( see the pattern here), wet behind the ears militant-stoodent who is, well, simply a complete cunt.

    There is a picture of her in the Daily Wail, grinning for the camera in grubby denim dungarees, holding what appears to be a pint glass of her own prestigious piss. A veritable, ungrateful turd on a rope.

    Cunts like Swain may not have even existed as a lump of protein now had those brave soldiers who gave their lives defending this country had the same outlook as this toothy tossrag.

  16. Any cunt who thinks I should be standing behind a barrier because they’re on a ‘walkabout’ is a wrong un….

  17. Off point….
    Most good comedy duos rely on the straight guy / funny guy formula, think the 2 Ronnies and morcambe and wise etc etc
    So I’m a little confused by blair and major? A couple of days ago ISAC hall of famer B.lair said if the people decided to have a second vote ( bad losers vote) ? Then if remain lost ( again) he would never ask for another vote? He would accept the decision? ( really) Well that’s fucking big of you blair!! Not to be outdone by his partner in crime major has come out with some real Jaffa’s, apparently America thinks more of the U.K. because we’re in the EU? ( hmm ) America doesn’t think any more or less of UK because we are leaving the EU you absolute cunt!! ,as usual major is deliberately blurring the lines between the Uk Leaving the EU and turning it’s back on EUROPE! It’s two completely different things, yet more deceitful trickery ….
    it’s amazing that two of the most despised Post war PMs have so much to say about brexit…..
    Fuck the pair of them….

    • Grey Man Major knows The Donald is POTUS right? He recently told Mavis to sue the EU rather than negotiate.

    • This is yet another instance of Blair’s belief that he should be the arbiter of UK policy rather than the vaguely democratically elected government. From which, when a member, he resigned completely two years early, forcing a bye-election and leaving the hapless Brown to pick up the pieces from the financial crash – which Blair MUST have known was just around the corner. His undertaking to shut up after a second attempt to get things his way is undoubtedly insincere: if he doesn’t agitate for a third referendum, he’ll continue to obstruct the process by all the considerable means available to him. The Blair Institute is an international lobby group, among all its other nebulous functions. Its PR capacity is high, and it can also access other ex-Blair staffers in useful positions in PR and government.

      The remark re. America is simply laughable. US affection for the UK is confined to areas in which the UK can be persuaded to advance US interests. Trade and geopolitics. The UK might be useful as a bridgehead for American goods entering Europe, but it is no more useful than, say, the Netherlands. Given Trump’s inclination to protectionism, and the inevitable retaliation from Europe, this is much less of an issue than it might be. As to geopolitics, would the UK outside the EU be more or less dependent on working relations with the US? No-brainer.

      Blair is a known liar who doesn’t do detail. He should be, and increasingly is, ignored, as the cunt he is.

  18. Apparently Phil the Greek is over the moon with the new parasite. He’s hoping it’s a girl, and they call her Elizabeth as a nod to great granny. But also so Phil can sing her to sleep:-
    ‘Whoa! Black betty bam a la. Whoa…”

  19. West Ham need a cunting for suspending Mark Phillips, the under-18s coach. He said to his employers he attended the march organised by the Democratic Football Lads Alliance.
    The anti discrimination group Kick It Out brought Mark Phillips support for the DFLA to the attention of the Premier League. Was Mark Phillips arrested or cautioned for inciting hatred or trouble, I don’t believe he was, but by marching with this group he was expressing his freedom and his right to do so.
    As far as I know the DFLA are rightly entitled to speak out and march if they like and once again it is a case of spineless cunts pandering to the left and others that will not allow freedom of speech.
    When the fuck will it stop that we will not be allowed or entitled to have a difference of opinion or views to other people. Fucking cunty cunts

    • The ‘Appy Ammers’ are fucking laughable… Lectures on morality from a club run by two highly dodgy porn barons and the biggest slagbag in the history of the game, Karen Brady…. PC messages from cunts who have made millions out of hardcore xxx material and jazz mags… Fucking hilarious…

      And as for Kick It Out? Self appointed, self important, unelected self serving scum….

  20. YouTube apparently down world-wide…

    Am I paranoid, or are they out to kill alternative media ?

  21. Superbly and comprehensively cunted, DF. Leading to the thought that given the current crop, maybe we’d be better with a dynastic upset which leaves a moderately intelligent Hanoverian horse (as opposed to a Hanoverian human) on the throne, It’s a strong. intelligent and handsome breed, well suited to public display. Subject to the guidance of a bloodline expert such as Mr. Fiddler evidently is, and given the far greater expertise of horse breeders than of those guiding the current succession (if anyone is) , we could look forward to a long line of attractive and economically maintained monarchs, as capable of opening a flower show as HM the Q, and , mercifully, silent when doing so, bar the odd digestive noises.

    I would be inclined to retain Princess Anne, nevertheless. She may well be a Hanoverian horse, and it would be unfair to bar her from the new regime.

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