Benedict Cumberbatch [5]

Benedict Cumberbatch is a cunt, isn’t he?

According to eye-witnesses (well, him) he foiled an attempt by four attackers to mug an innocent man, alone in London. This was in the dingy, mean streets of Marylebone. Apparently, according to an on-the-spot witness (erm, him again), he prevented the crazed, presumably drug-fuelled, madmen severely hurting a poor delivery bloke on a moped.

Hmmm.

Marylebone High Street is a wealthy restaurant area frequented by the type of entitled turd with oodles of spare cash and hardly a dodgy area. Dave “I won’t resign if Remain loses” Piggy-Cameron dines there. It’s also in close proximity to Baker Street. Cumberbatch and Baker Street. I smell the rancorous odour of a cheap marketing story.

Furthermore it was last year. Why’s the story bursting now? In vain have I searched for this daring crime-fighter to be flogging some new, insipid tv dogshite but no; nothing except a film about Brexit. Psh.

Listen Benny, you’re not fooling anyone. Your Harrow days weren’t spent scrapping overTop Trumps in the playground and your RADA stage-fighting wouldn’t beat a cripple with spaghetti arms. Your story’s about as authentic as the refugees you pretend to house. Cease interfering in virtue-signalling politics and fuck off back to Castle Cuntbags in Hampstead to rub talcum powder on your balls, you one-trick pony, poodle-faced ponce.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

40 thoughts on “Benedict Cumberbatch [5]

  1. Marylebone twinned with Compton??
    FFS!! You couldn’t imagine cunterberbatch fighting off four primary schoolchildren…..
    laughable story…….

    • Great news about Cumbercunt, his great-great-great grandfather made his fortune as a Barbados slave owner according to Wiki. That means that this virtue signalling cunt can apologise on behalf of his family and pay reparations from the lots of money he obviously has to all the bleck and mixed race people (of which a few must be good for an organ donation being related through bleck shagging grandpa) . Hooray it’s obviously what he has to do. Think of the kudos and virtue in it. No Benny? Didn’t think so CUNT!

  2. I remember reading this and I didn’t buy a word of it. He’s such a zeta male my 7 year old girl could fill him in without breaking a sweat. The idea of him taking on a crew of aspiring architects is laughable.

  3. …….We’re they the same nasty cunts who gang raped the fragrant Gina Miller in front of Mike End station that there’s no evidence for?
    These remoaning cunts just can’t stop fucking lying can they?

    • You mean the ‘attack’on Miller that wasn’t reported at the time? You know, when rape was actually seen by the police a serious crime, and cozzers were actually arsed about catching those who did it?…. You mean the ‘attack’ that had no witnesses or security camera footage whatsoever? Not forgetting a total lack of DNA, medical tests, forensics etc….

      Fucking lyng Banana Gobbed trollop of a cunt…

  4. I haven’t heard about this story but I’m somewhat sceptical too….
    We all know what ponces actors are …. fighting off a knifed up moped gang …. hmmm.

    Off topic but I thought I’d watch some BBC this morning for a change.
    BIG MISTAKE.
    First we’ve got the multicultural token whateverthefucks gabbing inaneley about #metoo, mansize tissues and knowing when and when not to hug someone…. ? … they even had an interview with a ‘professional hugger’ … professional cunt, you mean.
    An Asian interviewer (who is shite by the way) asking Katie mellua about her ‘faith’.
    ..What is it with sodding asians and religion?!

    That fucking fat scottish Asian ‘comedian’ woman was on. …. my piss is boiling just looking at the cunt.

    A football hooligan that found religion and cleaned his life up… guess which religion it was?

    Then it’s about ‘hate crimes’.
    There are a bunch of Muslim women training in mma …. hahahahahahaha.
    They’re the shittest mma fighters in the world. Pathetic.

    Now it’s Indian music by blind people.
    ….and faith of course.

    Fuckin BBC…..

  5. A cunt indeed, Captain.
    I’ve got a couple of lady friends (in the platonic sense of the word) who moisten their pants at the mention of the fucker’s name. Don’t know what he’s got but I wish I could buy some. The cunt.

  6. Superb Cunting Captain!

    A regular faggot faced minge juice bottler. Surprised he’s not already on the Wall of Cunts.

  7. Resembles a reject from the (stocking-masked era) Devo tribute band.

    ………Except Cummercunt doesn’t need the stocking.

    Imagery elsewhere on the internet

  8. Cumercunt is an ugly bastard. Strange because his mum Wanda Ventham was quite a looker in her day. Fancy having that pansy for a son.

    • She most certainly was WCB!

      Amusingly pretended to suggest oral sex with Arfur Daly (using asparagus!) who ran for the hills. Most memorable in the Lotus Eaters. That was her prime!

    • Ah… so it’s a case of nepotism. The cunt would never have got a look in otherwise.

      Fine piece of detective work Mr Boggs.

  9. Does anybody remember that chubby homo from Take That, the one who went solo, Robbie Williams? I’ve just read that he supports a hard Brexit!

    Astonishing.

    It’s rather interesting this constant re-evaluating of people and adjusting one’s abhorrence to previously-thought-of cunts.

  10. Doubt you’ll feel the need to adjust your abhorrence here Captain:

    Gormless looking turd Sir Kier Starmer told Andrew Marr this morning “The country is losing confidence in the Prime Minister.”

    Wow! No shit? Such perception!

    Dominic Raab, on the same programme, re: the final ‘Meaningful Vote’ in the House of Commons, said it would be: “a very clear choice, an unequivocal decision, between THE DEAL WE NEGOTIATE and NO DEAL.”

    Cue howls of Labour, SNP, remoaner anguish…

  11. Bendadick was shite in Tinker, Tailor. As indeed was Colin Fart, but at least his character got shot, always a nice moment (as when he got stabbed on his front doorstep by Robert Carlyle (in Born Equal), a much better actor.
    Thank Dog I’ve got the Alec Guinness version on DVD. Full of the greatest actors.

  12. Robbie Williams a brexiteer?? Are you sure? That sounds as likely as Sir Nicholas Clegg abandoning his beloved country in its hour of need to fuck off to California to fill his pockets with Yankee dollars. I mean, who would believe that?

    Er……..every cunt in the world, now I come to think of it.

    • Saw Clegg on TV a few weeks ago bleating as usual about brexit “ I can’t think of one positive thing about brexit” chortled the remoaner!! Well if it means you and your fucking Spanish lawyer Cunt of a wife move to Spain that’s a positive for me you utter shit stain …….
      Cleggs been auditioning for an EU Commissioner’s job for the last few years, you know the deal!, 300,000 + euros a year and a whole lot of fucking goodies on top, all for doing virtually sweet FA…. No vested interest there then? Sir Cunt……..

  13. What I find interesting is the percieved association regarding bendadick.
    As all good thick commoners know, brainy people always look a bit odd.
    So we get this odd looking actor, make him appear a teensy bit posh and stick him in the role of sherlock holmes.
    Thick cunt bottom feeder tv fans think it’s awesome.
    So let’s give him a role as a prominent surgeon, now we get him to look gormless whilst making swishy motions with his flippers and BLAM! a brainy superhero every serf can believe in.
    Now he’s a superhero, he’s fighting in the streets of londonistan.
    For crying out loud!
    Fuck off cunt.

    • Benderbert Cuntberdinck is the worst Sherlock Holmes of all time… Any millennial fuckflake spunk dribble who thinks that Cuntberdinck and Moffatt’s abomination is better than the definitive Granada Jeremy Brett version is a thermonuclear cunt….

      I know I’ve moaned about how Doctor Who has been ruined, but I’d rather have Sugartits Jodie in the role than Benderbert Cuntberdinck, he’s fucking diabolical…. And as for that Irish poofter who minced it up as Moriarty? What a cunt he was… ‘Moriarty! Are you free?’ ‘I’m freeeee!’

      • Jeremy Brett? Nah, fuck off – the definitive Holmes has to be BASIL RATHBONE. And Nigel Bruce as Dr Watson, ffs!

        I’ll forgive you though Norman old boy, Rathbone probably a bit before your time…

        • Watched all the Rathbone and Bruce films as a youngster when the Beeb had them on Friday teatime on BBC 2. Jeremy Brett was good as well though.
          Special mention for Christopher Plummer in Murder by Decree. Fancy Jack the Ripper being a Prince. Maybe jug ears Charlie could run amok with his pruning shears…

          • No worries, RTC… I also remember Tom Baker doing Sherlock Holmes once…. Tom also did a Holmes tribute in the excellent ‘Talons Of Weng Chiang’ in Doctor Who… A great one, that was… And Louise Jameson in her wet underwear… Superb stuff…

          • “Talons” supposedly holds the record for the most complained about Dr Who story ever due to it’s violence and horror overtones.
            Shame about the rather wonky giant rat effects. Now it’s state of the art effects and wonky writing and stories.

  14. Suppose actors weren’t credited at all…like binmen and others doing a daily grind. The actor is required to be someone else during his performance. His own identity is irrelevant, except to HR. In that case, would we have heard of this incident at all? It was pretty Normal for London, after all.

    Roll the credits where credits are due, though, and let’s hear it for Manuel Dias, the Uber driver conveying Cuntersnatch, who joined in when he saw the actor had bitten off more than he could chew, and may well have saved his bacon.

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