We should have seen the warning to history back in the 80’s when Citroen 2CV’s appeared dressed as lady birds.
In the entire history of the automobile the ‘deux chevaux’ set the scene. A genuinely awfull mode of transport beyond basic.
Who drove this shit? In my experience it was long frock wearing right on Media Studies and Art Teachers destined to become modern parents.
No doubt Le Froggy, knowing the cars they produced were an utter pile of shite marketed them as having a personality that reflected yours, this car is really shit, I mean really really shit and you’re such a cunt you’d love to associate your self with it as it marks you out as being ‘like ya know, right on man’
So fast forward to 2018 and the modern day equivalent.
The latest trend? Let’s give the fucker a name, let’s call the cunt Adam, some cunt in Vauxhall’s marketing department got a bonus for that.
Not to be outdone, Renault respond with the Zoe, a shit name if ever there was but they’ve got previous as they brought us the Megane. Or Megan in English.
Then there’s the Cactus, ok it’s not a name as such, but who drives a car named after a hardy desert plant with a random rubber pattern adorning the flanks?
Fortunately though for the Snowflake, times moved on, todays cars are an appendage, air con is standard, as is a luxury interior but what counts most is giving the cunt a human name.
I had a mate who got a boxer dog and called it Norman, it was quirky at the time, now every cunt is giving their pets a stupid human name as it makes them stand out when they have to shout ‘Norman, come here now, bad Norman, stop trying to bum Ted’
And to cap it all you’ll never own Zoe or Adam as the Snowflake only understands the ‘never never’ instilled in them by the bank of Mum and Dad.
Nominated by CuntyMcCuntface.