Elon Musk

Elon Musk, the Cunt behind the Tesla car brand which all the snowflake cunts think are the solution to the world’s transport energy issues. Well breaking news – the electricity has to be generated somehow so if every car became electric then how the fuck could they all be charged/recharged just look at any garage when they get busy there are queues and 10 gallons of petrol takes seconds so how would an electric “garage” work.

And secondly he wants to make the human race intergalactic. Well that’s a no, we can’t as a species be allowed to infest the universe.

Nominated by goodwoodone

Elon Musk is desperate to fill the void on tech worship left by Steve Jobs. The fucking fervent reporting on his Falcon SpaceX rocket launch was beyond frenzied and bordering on mass-wanking-hysteria.

Sure, the science behind the rocket launch (for anyone who cares) is a revolution of sorts. But the problem with this egotistical cunt is that he is ensuring his name is all over it, to the point where this whole rocket stunt has become one giant Tesla/Elon Musk advert.

Press are largely ignoring the fact that Tesla, the electric fucking car company Musk is behind, has made a sizeable loss and with regard the Falcon rocket, the central booster failed to land back on target, and the final stage overshot the intended orbit for Mars.

And most cuntably of all, what payload did Musk choose for this rocket? His own Tesla Roadster car with a dummy strapped in, the stereo of course playing Bowie’s ‘Life on Mars’ on loop. Things do not get any more fucking self-indulgent than that.

So, it’s a cunting for having a stupid name, for being a vain tryhard and for being yet another egotistical fucker in the world of science. Fuck you. Life on Mars? There’ll be Cunts on Mars at this rate.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

62 thoughts on “Elon Musk

  1. The lucky Cunt’s been married (twice) to Tallulah Riley and also had a go on Amber Heard.
    I’m very,very jealous.

    • Agreed, DF. Heard is a colossal cunt and represents everything I hate most about wimminz (in particular with her, the domestic abuse lies and the endless gold-digging) but, holy shit, I’d go at her like an Intercity 125 smashing into a scarecrow filled not with straw but with mashed banana and strawberry blancmange.

      • “filled not with straw but with mashed banana and strawberry blancmange”

        Alarmingly specific there Thomas. I think there’s more to this (ahem) metaphor than you’re letting on. I think we should be told. 😉

        • Well, my wife looks like Worzel Gummidge and I’d certainly like to run that cunt over with a train.

      • Heard is psychotic and a serial celebricunt rugmuncher/starfucker… Like Slagelina Jolie she is one of those women who leaves me cold… Crazier than a shithouse rat, the pair of them…

    • Musk will probably end up marrying another Hollyweird tosser like Scarlett Johansscunt… Mind you, he might be frightened of getting the ‘Franco’ treatment… But I think his cash would erase any ‘issues’ she might have…

  2. Anyone with a Monty Python name like Elon Musk just has to be monumental cunt…
    And it’s no coincidence that Yank rhymes with both plank and wank…

    • I could never take this guy seriously because of his name. It sounds like some over priced, libtard elite, designer toilet water.

      “When you want to smell like the rat’s ass you don’t give. Elon Musk. New from Calvin Klein. Available only at Harrods.”

      As an Americunt I feel compelled to remind you that Yank also rhymes with spank…and skank…and stank…as in…

      He used Elon Musk. I wanted to spank that skank because he really stank.

      • Allow me to “revise and extend my remarks”

        “I gave the British tart a bottle of the new Elon Musk for women. Then I wanted to spank the skank because she stank.”

        (We don’t always get it right the first time.)

  3. Closely followed by Amazon’s Jeff Bezos who now has a rocket too.

    I have also got one, keep it in my trousers.

  4. This cunt is just the latest in a long line of cunts with too much money, too much time on their hands and an ego which could blot out the sun.

    Now we’re told by the ‘scientific community’ on an almost constant basis that man made global warming is killing the planet and that fossil fuels, the burning of which is causing this, are fast running out anyway. Thus we need to switch to renewable energy sources pronto otherwise we’re fucked and running electric vehicles will do the trick climate-wise. Odd then, that the same ‘scientific community’ has estimated that we’ve so far drilled/refined a small % of the fossil fuels buried beneath the earth’s crust. How do they know that? I don’t know, but I’ve seen estimates ranging from 5% to 15% in various places.

    To switch all vehicles to run on battery/electric power would need a MASSIVE increase in our ability to generate the electricity needed. Renewable sources like solar, wind and wave simply couldn’t provide the energy needed. Nuclear seems to be no-one’s friend until they figure out fusion, so what’s left? Oh yes, burning fossil fuels. So let me get this straight – burning fossil fuels is killing the planet so switching to running everything on battery/electric power is the answer and to generate enough electricity to do that would require us to burn a shit load more fossil fuels. Is it just me, or is that a circular argument which actually defeats the object of making the argument in the first place?

    My biggest issue with electric cars is – at this point in time – making the change from petrol driven cars is NOT an improvement. If you’re going to evolve, innovate and change a technology, then what you end up with should be better than what you’re trying to replace. Currently, that’s simply not the case.

    Imagine filling up your car with petrol and driving a few hundred miles to see an old friend. You arrive at said friend’s house who says it’s great to see you and that you should pop down the local offy to get some beers. You jump back in your car and do the offy trip no problem. All on the same tank. Alternatively, you drive your electric car less than a few hundred miles, then have to stop for 4 hours to re-charge the fucking thing before continuing your journey. You arrive late at your friend’s house. Is the offy still open? Let’s say it is. You still need beers, but you can’t risk the trip over there until you’ve re-charged your fucking car for another 4 hours. By which time the offy will be closed. So, it’s taken you way longer to get to your friend’s house. You arrived much later than you wanted to, after dark perhaps, you’re more tired and fatigued than you would have been otherwise and you’re too late to do a beer run because your fucking car is a cunt and has decided it won’t work unless it’s been plugged in for god knows how long. How is that progress? How is that better than what we have now? It isn’t, so electric cars and the cunts who make them, promote them, buy them and drive them can go do one. Cunts!

    • I am puzzled as to where are they going to get all that lithium shit they need to make all the batteries ? Will that be found in big open cast mines next to the fucking empty oil wells ? Well that’ll be fucking pretty wont it ! Then what are we going to with all those batteries and lithium shite once they are fucked ? Perhaps throw them in scrap heaps and let all of it leach into the oceans. Look at what a fucking disaster an inert substance such as plastic is causing. Well we ain’t seen nothing yet I tell you.

      • Precisely CV. It could well be that battery technology will reach a stage of technical advancement such that our collective arguments against electric everything become moot. I doubt it though. History tells us of numerous unlimited energy claims, none of which have ever come to pass or even close. I’m old enough (just) to remember the promise of “free” electricity when North Sea oil was discovered. Did that happen? Solar promised much but has delivered little and practically nothing when you factor out the massive subsidies needed to develop/use it. Wind, same. Wave, same. Hydro-electric, same.

        There may come a day when we make as big a leap with electric/battery power as we did going from horse drawn wagons to the internal combustion engine. We’re not there yet and as far as I can tell, we’re not even close. So until such time when I can buy a car with a fuel cell the size of a AA that’s good for 1,000 miles and is cheap enough to buy a pack of 10 at a time for the price of a couple of tanks of petrol, Musk can eat my shit and choke on it.

    • Over here there will always be a Muzzie shop open to sell you as much beer as you want.
      By the time they take over the country there may be no beer but the electric cars will be perfect.
      Always look on the bright side I say !

      • There’s a fair chance that his brother has the premises next door to provide you with a late night snack too.

        Flat roofed terraced shopping outlets…bloody marvelous.

  5. If billionaires are able ( and allowed ) to resource projects that one day could threaten a democracy, then I am alarmed. Imagine if George Soros threatened democracy, not with cash, but with ballistic missiles, then we are in the throes of the end game.

    There are enough billionaires who are egotistically deranged and who are more than able to threaten mankind with whatever arsenal they develop.

    Those movies such as Rollerball and Robocop are not far fetched at all.

    Be warned. The politico’s are already in the pockets of some really nasty rich cunts. Be afraid. Very afraid.

  6. What we need is solar powered cars where the entire chasis is made of solar batteries. Or part solar, part electric, part petrol. That will be good. Every car would then only need 3 engines, which would create employment in the north east, and those employees pay tax. Can’t see a downside, I realise an entry level Fiesta would cost £30k but you could get a 0% loan.

    On the subject of the oil that’s still left. Now I am no expert but I read an article in the Telegraph that said we have only used 15% of the oil, but the trouble is, the remaining 85% is under the sea (as opposed to under the sand).

    • I read something similar, CnR. I take your point that drilling in super deep waters poses more of a challenge, but I take the view – we’re sending probes to Mars at this point in our evolution, so how hard can it be?

      By the way, 1-0. Get in! Harry Kane – he’s one of our own! 🙂

      • No he’s not. Harry Kane is the filet mignon of cuntery. It’s comments like that that prove I have the best musical taste on ISAC.

        • I would challenge your claim C&R. Judging by your moniker you are a fan of some over-hyped tossers who were really just a pale imitation of AC/DC. I know I am right.

  7. I actually don’t mind elon musk.

    I really enjoyed the falcon heavy launch the other day, especially when those boosters dropped back from orbit, fired up again and landed on their launch pads perfectly.
    I’m always gobsmacked when they do that. How is that even possible?

    He does have a stupid name though.

    • I watch the kids over the road do it with them drone things all the time. Amazing as when I was their age, I was limited to a paper aeroplane made from a blank sheet of paper if I was lucky that allowed me to draw the windows and colour it my way.

      The plane usually ended up with a crushed nose on its maiden voyage that it never recovered from.

  8. And as far as tesla is concerned, anything that puts the camel shaggers out of business can’t be all bad.

  9. Tesla is fun for anagrams. Slate, stale, steal, tales, godwouldiliketoshagreecewitherspoon. Stuff like that

  10. I like all this space/astronomy stuff and the talk about manned flight into deep space but as I stand in my garden late at night and stare at the heavens, it’s pretty obvious it’s never going to happen because everything is so fucking far away.
    Cleary at some point there will be the technology for a vehicle to travel, but the human body won’t cope and the life support systems won’t be up to it, and the fridge will need to be the size of an Ikea warehouse.

    At the moment we have the ISS and when that flies over my house (I’ve seen it) it’s only 400km above, which seems fuck all. Knowing that I’m closer to the ISS than say, Birdman’s house doesn’t seem like much of an achievement.
    And what has the ISS actually done for mankind? I’ve seen some cunt playing the guitar and maybe they’re watching fruit flies trying to shag in zero G for scientific purposes, but looks a bad return for $150Billion…

    • I watch the live feeds from the ISS from time to time. It’s so weird watching the planet you’re actually on rotate in stone silence.

      Probably like yourself JR, I’ll watching anything on TV that’s space related. Can’t get enough of it. I wish I was smart enough to understand more of it. I did Physics A’ level at school and that nearly gave me an aneurysm, so a job at NASA probably isn’t on the cards. Unless it’s making coffee for the really clever people.

      We now know that everything in the universe is moving away from everything else at ever increasing speeds. The distances between galaxies now are mind numbing and are getting more so, so the idea that little mankind will ever be solar system hopping or galaxy hopping are a mere pipe dream. Even if we could send a small colony out into deep space on the understanding they’d reproduce in flight and their children would be the people to set foot on a distant planet, how would that work? Who would educate these people? What would it be like to be born and grow up on a space ship in zero G? How would they sustain themselves? Who’d be in charge of the booze cabinet? Would there be enough pussy to go round?

      Manned missions to Mars seem to be on the cards. Long trip for sure, but doable with today’s technology. The biggest catch I believe is the prolonged exposure to cosmic radiation. By the time the astronauts arrived in Mars’ orbit, they’d be riddled with all kinds of cancers. And that would be a cunt.

      • The PC brigade would fuck it up anyway by demanding the ship was loaded up like the ark, going in two by two.

        Two of these would be Eritrean / Somalians from the Yarmouth area and the crew would hence all be dead from HIV aids as there wouldn’t be enough medicine on board at @ £24K a year per person or room for it.

        And that’s only if the peaceful religion worshipers the PC mob put on board don’t kill the infidel Captain & First Officer.

        Trust the PC gang fuck it all up once again!

    • Pay heavensabove a visit, you can put in your town / coordinates and get a live sky map and info on everything that passes over.

      It amazes me that there is so much junk up there in lower orbit already. Surely if someone wants to get some recognition, they should be up there retrieving it all?

      Nah, I’m going to launch more debris in the form of a car into space because I can afford it and space doesn’t belong to anyone on earth.

    • Here’s a piece of trivial information for you JRC,
      According to some expert on tv it would take 9 years to walk to the moon?
      The Cunt didn’t mention if that included lunch breaks or stopping off for a few jars!!
      It sounds along way whatever way you look at it!! , and when you eventually got there what exactly would you do?? No pubs
      Clubs or restaurants?? It’s an absolute waste of time……….

      • LOL. Not to mention the lack of a foot path to help get you there. Or the lack of an atmosphere to assist with breathing. And if there were a bend in the path you just know there’d be a Paki shop open 24 hrs a day just waiting to serve you a 4 pack of Carlsberg for £200.

        • 😂😂
          Until they find something better
          Than planet earth space is of little interest, if you could simply pop up there and be home for dinner I might feel differently
          😎…….

      • There’s a telescope on it somewhere that you can perv in bedroom windows with.

        I know it exists because John Lewis found it last Christmas.

  11. He is only a scar and a fluffy white cat away from being a Bond villain. He’s going to have to change his name though, as it now sounds like an incense stick. At least he isn’t trying to eradicate malaria or polio, or other diseases that help keep the worlds population in check, like Bill Gates, the cunt, or running for president like Zuckerberg, the cunt.

    ‘Crater guns open fire!’ 😄

    • Actually, that’s a fucking brilliant analogy! Musk, Gates, Soros, Zuckerberg…they’re all members of the same modern day pseudoSPECTRE.

      Remember in Thunderball when Largo enters the secret headquarters? These cunts use the same scam. They cloak their fuckery with altruistic fronts…like caring for refugees, saving the planet, breaking down borders, exploring the cosmos et cetra, ad nauseum.

      What I wouldn’t give for just one of today’s celebacunt, do gooders to kick one of these fucks in the shin with a pointed shoe and do the world some real good.

  12. So long as that cunt gets us to the stars I couldn’t give a fuck.
    Going intergalactic is the only answer for a predator race like us. The reason we’re all going insane is because we have no common enemy. We’re so fucking great at warfare that facing no common enemy we have to have a go at ourselves. We need war so much that arms are the second largest economy on earth after illegal narcotics. Without war some of us turn into liberals, cut our dicks off and start listening to little mix.
    When our race unites in one direction we are epic. Any other sentience out there better fucking watch out. When we get there we’ll have at it with our teeth when our bullets run out.
    Fuck, if I’m still alive I’ll sign up if I can. Failing that I’ll have to get a telly license and a big pile of beer so I can sit in front of the news all day watching us blow everything up. Fuck off aliens, fuck the lot of you you cunts.
    Yes, get us to the stars mr musk and then kindly fuck right off.

    • I’d rather join the little green men than fight alongside the peacefuls after finding out their views on us infidels and the ISIS carry on. I could trust the little green men more and its going to be down to them to sort earth out if the pikeys fail in the final battle.

  13. Before i begin this cunting i just wanted to make sure that this isn’t a “where i live thing?” Ive noticed for a while now that while driving around my town and estate where i live, Yoofs are walking slowly across the road in front my car, staring at me as they do in a sort of “what the fuck you gunna do about it?” sort of way? It happened again today, four of them looked at me approaching and stepped out and slowly crossed the road, taking their sweet time, watching me as they crossed with sneers and attitude, which caused me to brake hard and wait while they got to the other side?
    Now either my town has lots of Blind teenagers wandering around, or this is yet again another example of total arrogance and disregard for anyone that isn’t themselves. Whilst i appreciate the average yoof is surviving today on a heady mix of arrogance and stupidity, the idea that they can challenge a ton of fast moving Seat Leon and survive is frankly ball shatteringly fucking stupid. Still, they’ve had several generations now being told that they are all special so perhaps they think their Superman or something.
    What i have taken to doing is waiting for them to start crossing, put my foot on the clutch and on the accelerator and my hand on the horn and make as much noise as i can, the look on their faces is one of startled, shit your pants surprise and makes my day. I Follow this up with a loud :CUUUUNNNTT” as i pass them just in case there is any doubt that they aren’t total and complete cunts.
    Got to be careful though, if i accidentally run over one of the fuckwits ill end up doing 30 years for an act of terrorism………

    • Like your style Detective.

      Have a similar problem where I live, however suspect this is common to most areas these days.

      Like you I try to make as much noise as I can and will generally accelerate past them as close as possible.

      I also get incredibly hacked off when at traffic lights a fucking half wit decides to cross at exactly the same time as I get a green.

      Really what I want to do is to run the fucker over however will usually just sound the horn at the same time as shouting at them.

      Think it important that they should realise the error of their ways.

      Same as to the drivers who do not thank you for letting them have right of way.

      Or the Eastern European cunts who park on a double yellow so they can pop into their local Turkish restaurant for a bite to eat, meaning cars have to queue and wait to get past.

      Thick ignorant cunts.

      • When did you last see a policeman on the street? You should be able to run the cunts over with impunity now, unless you happen to be a white middle aged male that is.

        • I think they are walking the beat of the internet super highway in a warm office, trawling for hate crimes and updating their Cuntbook status.

    • No signs of this in my area.

      Think its time for a cheap dashcam if you haven’t got one already. Once you point up to the camera on the window, they won’t try it with you again.

      Just don’t ever part with the original footage to anyone in the event of an incident, only give out copies and retain original in a safe place.

    • Not recently but I had this happen when I first passed my test over 30 years ago. I was driving home when some spotty cunt in school uniform did exactly that but decided to give me two fingers as well. I went for him, swerving so I caught him with the nearside wing and sending the twat onto the pavement. In hindsight I should have just got out of the car and giving him a swift kicking, but I was still young and stupid and things were different then plus it didn’t seem to occur to the prick that I’d just done something I could realistically have been jailed for. The look on his face was priceless and I bet the fucker never did it again.

  14. Finding Eric is on the telly just now.
    I’d heard it is a good filum and I’ve been looking forward to it all day. It started and said the words every filum fan fears… “a Ken Loach film”

    Jeez….. It done exactly what it said on the tin.
    The very first scene had our protagonist trying to kill himself driving round a round about.

    Ten minutes I gave it.

    I’m going to watch Watership Down to cheer me up……

  15. I read somewhere that the carbon foot print to make one of these cars was bigger than one of our petrol cars today and its lifetime of fuels used before its scrapped.

    Isn’t it little kids that we are to believe mining the lithium while digging for whatever it is that goes into an iPhone to make it so super duper?

  16. I was given a ride in one of his cars recently. Very nice, cost £90k,fucking should be nice. What is the range ? sez I.- Up to 300 miles depending. – what on? sez I. – Aircon, heater ,speed, load.
    What is the biggest distance you have run it ? 90 miles. A bit nervous that the electrometer [ how long you have left ] might not be that accurate, but it’s a great car,can recharge in an hour.
    Nice motor sez I , not wishing to be rude but thinking you must be a cunt to buy one ,hardly any charging points, a long traffic jam in hot or cold weather and the thoughts about just coming to a stop start getting the old bottle quivering and it cost £90 grand.
    He is already deep in cunt territory and still thinks Elon is a god. Well he has to ,doesn’t he?

    • TB – I’ve heard this described as “range anxiety syndrome”. The fear of not knowing if you’ll be able to complete your journey and be stuck somewhere so far away from a charging point, that you’ll be well and truly fucked.

      Compare that to being a bit of a tit and thinking you’ll make it to the next petrol station when you’re already on fumes. Car stops. You get a lift to the nearest garage or call your breakdown service and before you know it, a jerry can has topped you up and you’re on your way.

      I suppose if you ran out of electricity in the middle of nowhere, you could always wait for them to build a charging station nearby at some point in the future. But I figure the wait might be longer than fetching a jerry can. Most likely. 🙂

      • Apparently they are a right laugh when you put the foot down and the power is like flicking a switch. On the range thing, that’s a lot of money for 300 miles range and when you do run out, you can’t jump start them or two, its a recovery to at least the closest charging point, which is where?

  17. Jose Mourinho: Man Utd boss says team could have gone 10 hours without scoring…

    Yeah… That’s because they are useless cunts and so are you, Jose, you cunt…

  18. I quite admire Musk. Compared to old Skull Head 💀 Branston at least his ventures have credibility not like that cunt who just uses everyone else’s wedge to promote his stupid Virgin brand. Cunt.

    • Cant see that. Branson started a big airline and a huge tv and entertainment business, which are usable and that people enjoy, plus they are credible alternatives to BA and SKY. Yes he can be a cunt but Musk ,who loves himself even harder than Branson, has a car that no fucker can afford and a rocket which might go to Mars and who fucking cares, it’s visibly a shithole and marginally worse than most of the Middle East, which we definitely don’t want more of !

  19. Reuseable boosters…ok. Nice one. All in favour of recycling stuff particularly if it’s made from platinised unicorn feathers like most space gear.
    Approximate trajectory for no very clear objective…hmmm. Looks like he needs someoone who does sums on the team.

    Firing large lump of debris ( working definition of battery-powered car) into unpredictable orbit…what a cunt. Reminder: the only selling point (misleadingly) offered for the Tesla venture is its environmental benefit. So let’s just chuck one into the space-crap field now engulfing us. Or maybe chuck it at Mars, which every mission to date has been at pains to keep Earth organisms from contaminating – where it will accomplish no useful function whatever. A complete and conspicuous waste of money to promote a cunt.

    But no more of a cunt than Virgin ™ Branson. Who has just got a donation of £1Bn from the Saudis to develop his scheme for firing very rich people into low Earth orbit. Now if he left them there, there’d be a point.

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