Carillion

Carillion, the unscruplous granny-selling cuntractors, are mastodon-size cunts, right down to the last employee.

I’m delighted to see one of these firms go to the wall. For years now, the whole notion of contracting everything out to bodies of bastardry like Serco, Carillion, G4S and any other rip-off merchant you can mention has helped effectively ring-fence taxpayer’s money on nothing but contractor mistakes and strategically planned ‘variations’ – effectively extra money because of caveats excluding certain elements in a project, buried under a ton of contract documents too impenetrable for government project managers to handle – thereby fleecing hospitals, schools, highways, utilities…. you name it.

Now these shitcunts cry for help from the government because they, despite loads of high profile contracts, still managed to fuck up. I note the bosses have secured gold plated wank flannels though – of course they won’t suffer.

I despise contracting firms with a fucking passion. My only sadness here is that more of them don’t go fucking bust.

Brick-chewing, estuary-vowelled, pencil-in-ear whistling cuntfucks.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

33 thoughts on “Carillion

  1. Agree wholeheartedly TECB.

    Much egg on the face of government for letting things get thus far.

    An interviewed supplier to Carillion today (who said he was owed so much he will go out of business) said he felt assured to carry on supplying them as the government continued to award contracts. Said that he thought the government would be undertaking due diligence when giving them business. As a secondary credited will get fuck all from the administrators.

    He is talking about the current government, totally inept and who almost could not be more fucking useless than they already are. Ffs.

    • All Governments – both Labour & Tory – commencing with Bliar (who else?) are up to their scrawny fucking necks in it.

      Shades of Batmanjelly’s Kids Company writ large…

    • Small potatoes compared to the NHS “computerised system” scandal / fiasco run by liebour. Originally costing £3.1bn and at last count ran at £12.3bn before being abandoned. It is billed as the biggest IT failure ever – and still is.
      I was in the game at that time – telecoms / call centres and the money was easy – very easy. I dint get involved with the NHS shit but I had mates / chums in the game who were “IT consultants” (failed PRINCE2 rejects) on £1500 a week.
      One of said chums was asked on a monthly “progress meeting” what his scope of work would be the following 4 weeks by another useless cunt NHS project manager to which he replied “sanity and integrity testing” – box ticked – sounds plausible – move on. At which point he fucked about for an hour or two a day – golf in the afternoon and same again – turn up – backward compatibility testing – box ticked – move on. The cunt got the job after a successful spell working for a major clearing bank on a grand a week for the largest pisstake the world has ever seen AKA Y2K testing. Cunts made enough money in the 3-5 year run up to Y2k that they virtually retired and never did a fucking bat.
      Carillion maybe a cunt but in perspective it still has its L plates on compared to the massive rip off that is still major IT projects for any government body, and its still going on – massively.
      One of my last big jobs was when Fred “the shred” Goodwin was in charge (?) at RBS. He was the nastiest cunt going – like a rattlesnake with a hangover. He wanted the voice prompts changing on his complete estate of the inbound and outbound telephony. I had done the same job for Telecom Eireann for the bog dwellers – it was an easy piece of work – a bit time consuming but the concept was simple. Made it spin out for 6 weeks with onsite testing based in Dublin – all expenses paid and charged (for the company) £233k – total pisstake but I got a gong for a job described on the late late show by that strange little Gay Byrne as a “miracle”. I did the job for Fred and his entire estate – even wangled a trip out to Citizens bank in the US – was on it for 3 months having a fucking ball and stuffed Freddie and his chums £600k – it was thought value for money. Carillion is small potato compared to what goes on in the world of IT – its all smoke and mirrors – and they pay through the nose for it – Cunts one and all.

  2. Top Cunting.
    Why are there so many mistakes in everything building wise these days? You can guarantee that HS2 will cost the taxpayers an extra 20 billion more than the ‘estimated’ cost. The amount of money the government wastes and ‘pays’ to these cuntpanies is unimaginable.
    Most countries are corrupt, however our corruption and dodgy dealing is cleverly hidden amongst a pile of cunt as mentioned in the cunting.
    The cunts.

    • Not to mention that no cunt I speak to from North to South actually want HS2 and think it’s a huge waste of time and money.

      And yet the powers that be push it through without giving a hoot what the ordinary people paying for it (us) think!

      The only reason to push through this monumental white elephant is to ensure that Whitehall pockets are lined and Westminster palms greased.

      No other reason for it, especially now that the EU gravy boat is (hopefully) drying up.

      I fail to see how £30bn (so £100bn at the end when deadline after deadline are missed and all the “underestimates” are taken into account) is good value to get from Birmingham to London 10 minutes quicker when it’s going to be 20 minutes late more often than not!?!

      Besides, when the cunt is built by 2030 (so call that 2050 then), they’ll have to have 400 carriages per train and run them every 20 minutes because the population will be so high there’ll only be standing room left on the roof!

      Instead of pissing away £100bn on a doomed to fail project why don’t they invest that money on proper border controls and ejecting cunts who have no right to be here?

      By doing that we’d eventually save money and couldn’t even end up saving money in the long run as we’re not pissing it away on educating, caring for and paying for the rest of the world’s undesirable cunts!

      Come on government, you’ve proved you can’t resolve the Supply issue so let’s get down to resolving Demand!

      Fucking pick-pocketing cunts (HM Govt)!

      • The question arises: was HS2 cooked up specifically to support the likes of Carillion, in the full knowledge that it was a Ponzi scheme relying on taxpayers’ infinite money tree? I’d like to see the data from market research prior to the decision, and in particular, which interest groups backed it. PWC, perhaps, and Carillion’s auditors, KPMG, among them, I’d guess.

  3. James Shithead O’Brian was at pains to tell us this morning on LBC that if it wasn’t for EU legislation the Carillion workforce would have been unprotected and out on their ears down at their local food bank by tea time.

    Unlike O’Shithead I am not an expert on EU law, but if that’s true I’d be willing to fuck Macron’s mother!…or is it his wife?

    • Trust me there isn’t a single true word that ever came out of O’Shithead’s disgusting gob. He is a dirty EU propagandist who wouldn’t know the truth if it fucked him up the arse. Massive cunt.

      • In point of fact EU regulation prevents sovereign governments from bailing out failing companies. It is looked upon as unfair competition. Apart from banks, when it is “A” OK by the bankers, sorry wankers who run the EU.

        O’Brian is talking out of his arse as usual.

        • Second that Skidmark.

          The EU is completely opposed to state intervention.

          If there’s one thing they are good at it’s clamping down on Unfair Competition through state aid.

          I refer fellow cunters and O’Shithead to the very recent case of Google and Ireland.

          Quite simply the EU are going after the Oirish for failing to collect €15bn in taxes as s result of lower corporation tax rates than the rest of the EU. They are very clear they see this as State Aid.

          When the banks were bailed out the EU had to agree to it first and a massive prerequisite was they had to sell off a huge amount of assets to counter the Government investment.

          Now there’s a thing, didn’t Agent Clegg say only 7% of laws we were subject to emanated from the EU, yet upon facing the Eve of financial meltdown our Government had to seek EU approval.

          I’m convinced I keep missing something.

  4. I have some experience of these fuckers,both in HMP and Immigration Reception Centres. The whole shit shute is corrupted to the core, and the skim off from services , bungs , bribes and so on would even embarrass Al Capone.

    Im glad the tits have come off the racket. I never believed that the private sector had our best interests at heart, in Healthcare, in Security, in Prisons, Education and so on.

    Gordon Brown knew exactly what he was doing!

    Tax money was directed to the companies who in turn directed it into the trouser pockets of the share holders.

    Another company will take over the management, and so it will begin again. The opportunity to fleece the public is too great a temptation for the hungry bastard chums and bungers of the political class!

    • Unfortunately no-one has, or will ever have, “our best interests at heart”. Left or Right, they’ll all rip us off or run us into the ground one way or another. Corbyn will probably manage both simultaneously.

  5. even if what JOB says is actually true, there is absolutely no reason why similar safeguards cannot be brought in by the UK government once we leave the bloated fuckin gravy train.

  6. whats the betting the directors of Carillion will all be keeping their luxury mansions , flash cars and fat pensions, it’s probably all perfectly legal , ( they’re not total idiots ) but it absolutely stinks to high heaven.

    • With Treeza at the helm the fat cunts will likely be trousering multi £million pound bonuses well into the next decade.

  7. As an accountan’t, albeit out of the fucking game for years, I would love to look at their books. The whole thing gets more corrupt by the fucking hour. It seems to be they get awarded fucking mega contracts and sub them out generating massive cash flow by not paying the subbies. The wheels have come off from cost over runs. How the fuck can these cunts have basically run a scam on the tax payer for so long. And why award government contracts after two fucking profit warnings? Money must have changed hands but I bet no cunt gets prosecuted. Just like guilty bankers, no prosecution. Its win win.

  8. Why is it that any company who put a bid in for say a building contract be held to the price they quoted
    Should be if they say it will cost 2 million to build when they put there bid in,they get paid 2 million no more no less, not fuckin rocket science or am I missing something apart from they all being cunts

    • You would have thought so.

      The government have a fucking atrocious record when it comes to overspending on major projects, often double or more the initial quote.

      Suppose submitting a low quote in a tender situation secures the contractor the business, when the real cost is realised the government is either left with something that is only half finished, or they pay up to get it finished.

      The government pays up as it is not their money. The stupid fuckers fall for it every single time and never learn from their mistakes. Perhaps if the money was coming out of their own pockets things might be different.

      Cunts.

    • What often happens is that the quantity surveyors for the big contracting firms are highly skilled at combing over design specifications for discrepancies or ambiguous clauses. These cunts can then exploit such contractual anomalies to the max.

      In fact there are all kinds of scams available to these cuntfucks. In addition to the ponzi-scheme of not paying/gazumpng sub-contractors to improve cashflow, these pieces of shit can and will seize upon any opportunity for delays (increased prelim costs), put in variations which are sold as a ‘saving’ to the client (when in fact the contractor is making money from using a supplier they are in bed with and reaping a heavy discount), and generally cutting corners on design work for ‘design and build’ contracts.

      Often, clients like the NHS will also have tiers of sub-consultants and sub-project managers dealing with said charlatan contractors, and they don’t quite have the same desire to put contractors through the mill because it isn’t their money. These consultants are often as mercenery as the contractors; creating no-mark bureaucratic roles and pointless admin to bump their own fees.

      Take it from me, large contractors are the new bankers. Just as fucking greedy, just as morally bankrupt and just as cuntish to the last ounce. In fact, much of the building industry is a complete fucking racket.

      • Absolutely. Its like any cunt in any industry where money changes hands is granted a free ride with government contracts.

      • Extend that to middlemen everywhere. Layers and layers of unproductive management inserted between each and every stage on the road from producer to purchaser, taking cuts which total far more than the [producer is allowed to see.
        They say entrepreneur*. I say parasite.

        * From the French: entre = between and preneur = one who takes.

      • Well said and couldn’t agree more. Being a bean counter for subcontractors I know too well that large main contractors are the biggest and most stressful cunts to deal with. They’re not any cleverer but any legal dispute comes at a cost and the firm with an unlimited legal reserve will come out winning and a dirty claims lawyer will only too well muddy the waters if they have fuck all on you. Seen a few subcontractors get rich on a claim up but it’s rare. Generally speaking, It just becomes a lawyers delight as the fees mount up and the subbcontracor is seeing his business unfold with mounting legal fees. Its a dirty cunting game. However I’ve seen crooks who run subcontracting firms who fail to take it up the arse and start wielding their brutality at those who are playing with their money. A whole different scenario then and many of those guys get their money because of potential broken bones.

  9. This country has a proud history of achievement, now it would seem we couldn’t run a fuck up in a brothel. Governed by cunts, fuck them.

  10. Come on down rich cunts , come and bury your snouts in the bottomless taxpayer trough. Don’t worry about it going tits up the poor cunts at the bottom of the pyramid will pay the price the muggy cunts. You look after us and we’ll look after you, know what I mean?
    I just hope some journalists follow the money on this one because you can bet your life there will be more than a few Westminster criminals with their grubby little fingers in the till.

    By the way , I was at a cashpoint earlier on and I could have sworn it said:
    “Please take your card , your cash is being cunted”

    Premonition or should have gone to Specsavers ?

  11. Spot on, TECB !

    A few days ago, “they” said no bailout for Caril-liarn… and the CEO pissed orf, but still draws £600. 000 ?? So how will HIS salary be paid ?

    Yes, you guessed it – us mugs, the taxpayers come to the rescue once again !!

    Fellow cunters, aren’t we such kind, caring humanitarians ??!

  12. Spot on cunting…..
    They had to let them go bust .., when the real shit comes out on directors perks and bonuses awarded … This is just the start of it….
    And In light of how they bailed the banks and soon after the bull shit bonuses started again…
    BUT how the fuck does a company like that go busy.., when the biggest percentage comes from government contracts…?
    Run by cunts and the smaller contractors will pay the price….
    Cunts in the government with shady directorships probably on the board
    TOTAL CUNTS

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