The Internet

The Internet is a fucking cunt! You try to find some information, or some stupid shit that needs to be done, in this case lets say a science paper. But all you can find from the internet is a bunch smart arsed pricks writing overly complicated, cunty, fucked up shit that makes no sense whatsoever, that is useful to fucking no one! The internet is a fucking lie! A useless tool that is hailed as the greatest encyclopedia of all time, that is fit enough to replace actual teaching, even though it fails to answer even the simplest of questions and queries. Fuck. This. Shit.

Nominated by Jeff McJefferson

51 thoughts on “The Internet

  1. Yeah that’s the problem with Wikipedia, it’s publicly editable and is usually edited by experts in the field (intellectual elitists to the layman) so the articles are invariably convoluted, polysyllabic, esoteric jargon-fests.

    Never a glossary of terms to help the layman understand and maybe, oh I don’t know, LEARN from the information displayed.

    All too often when researching something I will have to have a Google tab open for searching definitions, a tab for the article itself and then about a dozen other tabs which are for links within the article which I have to read if I want to understand and progress with the original article. Total fucking ball ache. Science is the worst for it followed by politics.

    • The main difference between the science and politics is that science is often hard to understand because it’s actually complex and exact. The various fields actually require many of the special defenitions they use and most layman explanations (as exemplified by most “news” paper articles) are simplified to the extent that they become inaccurate at best, and simply wrong at worst.

      Meanwhile in cuntics, cuntiticians overcunticate things to hide exactly how cuntfused their ignorant cunt minds are while they are cunting everything up.

      Not only that, but you will generally find, that in the cases where you can simplify science while preserving all the meaning and exactness, you end up with an even longer explanation using simple words and lots of repetition, while in politics, should you waste enough time to break through the walls of cuntish obfuscation, you will typically arrive at a layman’s explanation which is more accurate, much shorter, and more intelligible.

  2. Without the internet ISAC would not exist and I would be blissfully rotting in the black wheelie bin.

    • Totally agree SB….
      I like the Internet, provides information and fun , ISAC obviously being at the top of my list, love you tube too, nothing more enjoyable than watching some dipshit making a cunt of themselves!! , I’ve often got lost down some you tube wormhole thread!………..

      • Like so much, it’s what you make of it.
        No internet, no ISAC…a chilling thought.
        It does have other uses, too…
        Even if 95 percent is fap-material.

  3. The internet is a great tool for people who already have a brain and/or like pornography. You cannot be educated in any subject through the fucking internet. That takes a lot of time and hard work.
    Go into any state school and you will see banks of computers. Go into a private school and you will see banks of books. That’s why they’re running the world and we can’t even get something we voted for. Am I bitter? You bet your fucking life I am.

      • Second that chaps, though not internet related, is Eton, Harrow or Rugby School obsessing over gender neutral toilets and uniforms or have classroom sizes of 30+ with English as a second language? I think not.

        • Actually, there was mention last week of some shennanigans at one of these schools, all about gender shite. They simply told the enquirer to “fuck off”

          Maybe state schools should do the same.

  4. I just think the internet is amazing. How do they get all those words down tiny little fucking wires!

    • Sean Mac bride peace prize ? Pah , he just happened to be Chief of Staff of the IRA , therefore a terrorist cunt .

    • I was reading a piece about that earlier Shitcake and read that Chris Williamson knew about the award 3 months ago, but said NOTHING then. The media were unaware the award existed so how can they report on it. Fucking lefty cunts.

      • Quite GB. The bolshy cunt sits there arguing black is clearly white, and he still demands to be taken seriously?

        How can you have a news blackout over something that even Corbyn or Momentum didn’t think worth publicising at the time?

        Did Comrade Catweasel have a satisfactory crap this morning? Were his piles troubling him? I don’t know, presumably there was another news blackout!


        • Corbyn has always been a cockgobbler for the provo’s. Those of us who served in the late 60,s early 70,s will always remember where the labour party stood on the question of “the troubles”. Corbyn was known to the security services even then. Anyone remember the slaughter in the Mall? Did that change Corbyn? Did it fuck.

    • I read about this cunt on the Guido Fawkes blog. He was slagging off the media for not mentioning that Corbyn had won some bullshit award named after some IRA cocksucker. Turns out, he hadn’t even heard of the award himself until a week or two before his rant. Honestly, Labour MP’s today are a bunch of braindead, far left cunts.

  5. Fuck me SB I’ve come across some utter cunting oxygen thieves in my life but that cunt has just muscled his way in to the top 3.

    That cunt deserves his own special cunting. 👊

  6. I wasn’t really aware that people did much on the internet bar watch porn,gamble and go on moaning old bastard sites. It’s great for that and that’s all I ask of it.

    • Old bastard sites are great, being on the way there myself I’m getting a head start.

      Another site I found is an “arrse” of a site full of forces & ex forces cunts. I’m not ex forces myself but a bit of lurking has educated me as to how much of being in the forces is a cunt and the crap the government expect them to go and do the job of defending themselves is ridiculous.

      You need a Blue Peter badge to prove you can make an assault rifle from a loo roll tube when your standard issue crap jams up.

      However the cunting speed here means little time to educate elsewhere. Its even interfered with my pron intake, reducing it muchness.

    • How would Compo Corbyn’s Momentum goon squad spread his message of peace, unity and an endless supply of free money to lazy feckless cunts?.

    • Now the internet has educated me that Riley is with one of the Strictly cunts…old news for some maybe.

  7. Internet has also given us You Tube which although entertaining and informative is interspersed with home made films where some cunt with a voice like Deputy Dawg can take 10 minutes to show you how to light a match. Then there is the aspiring Gordon Ramsay in his hovel of a kitchen spouting on about how to flip an egg. Our Pakistani mates tend to concentrate on vids about jail breaking mobile phones “ohhh bud bud bud” My all time pet hate on there are the amazing facts, health tips, 50 things you did not know you could do with a pencil sharpener and see what happens to your if you eat 25 Big Macs a day for a month. All of which are accompanied by a fucking computer generated voice, aaaaaaasgh. I shall impart one snippet of info I have recently garnered. How can you tell which Yorkshiremen are dyslexic? They are the ones wearing cat flaps on their heads. 🤓

    • I was in a queue at the bank, when suddenly a dyslexic armed robber bursts in and shouts..

      “Get the stick down! This is a fuck up”….

      • Was this when the dyslexic cop shouted “Throw down the gnu and come out with yours arms raised!!”?

        • Have you heard about the guy who discovered that he’s both dyslexic and gay? He’s still in daniel! 

      • Except that isn’t in any way related to dyslexia.

        I suppose it’s a decent joke if that’s the subtle point: making fun of cunts not under-cunting-standing what the cunt words they use actually fucking mean.

      • Did you hear about the Irish Exorcism?

        The mother had to call in the devil to get the priest out of her son.

    • Also streams of photos of IVth-rate, unknown Muricun “actresses”…
      “They were amazing (slags) in their teens, just look at how (monumentally obese) they are now…”

  8. Just landed a job at a website design agency, helping a one armed typist with her capital letters.

    It’s just shift work….

  9. I’m looking to buy a Gibson Les Paul for my useless son. He is a good musician though. All I did was a price check, just once. Since, almost every fucking site i visit has Les Paul adverts right fhrough the middle. How do the cunts know? Who tells them? Utter bastards.

    • I know. I look for the odd guitar now and then, as a mate once pointed out his formula for guitar ownership. Number of guitars needed is number of guitars owned, plus one. Now, I get tantalised by shiny new guitars every time I visit a website that has cookie based advertising. I only bought one back in the summer, so it’s a bit soon to justify another one so soon. I’ll find a way……

    • I get pestered by websites full of dirty tarts, usually over 40 allegedly wanting to meet up.

      One dirty looking bitch wants to sell me plenty of fish.

    • Got a Google account? Go into ‘settings’ and see how much shite you can switch off. Quite a lot, as it happens. Well worth a look.

  10. The biggest issue with the t’interweb is that it empowered cunts like Zuckerberg to become billionaire snowflakes who now control virtually everything we’re “allowed” to see on their FaceCunt, YouTwat and other associated purality.

    As Fox News has been removed from UK TV broadcasts (I wonder why – cunts) I watch Tucker Carlson on YouTwat. This is particularly odious as I have to suffer 10 cunt adverts just to watch a 40min programme. More annoyingly each time I subscribe to a “channel” carrying said Fox News programme it is usually removed within a week. Unlike the hate-filled ISIS channels which seem to be exempted from any such removals. Thanks Goocuntle!

    Similar censorship happens frequently on Zuckerberg’s CuntBook. “Peaceful” cunts allowed to say/show what they like but anyone who dares call them out for being the murderous bunch of cunts that they are…blocked, removed, or both.

    I should have though that Zuckerberg would have been more than aware of the damage that selective censorship has in any progressive society, and yet he’s happy to promote the 1,500yr old utterings of cunts who would like nothing more than to see his head on a spike, and yet stifles any opinion which sees that as a bad thing!?!

    More worryingly Zuckerberg is seriously considering running for US President. He won’t officially state this but – judging by the greasing that’s going on from CuntBook central – that is his intention.

    We have the Orange Buffoon rattling cages in the Whitehouse now but Christ on a bike can you imagine what utter fuckwittery the western world would be subjected to if that cunt ever got elected!?!

    Be afraid, be very afraid.

    The Internet was all good and well until “nobody’s” realised they could use it to self-promote their “non-existence” to the rest of the world who truly do not give a fuck about what you had for breakfast, or the depth of foam in your latte.

    That was until more of these cunts evolved providing us with the first generation of Internet Snowflakes. And that’s worked out well hasn’t it! 😠

  11. And the Internet has made news and journalism amateurish and lazy… Once top and established newspapers now employ any ex media studies student cunt who cannot even do the most simple and basic of research… Two recent examples were these: in the once great but now diabolical Manchester Evening News the headline ‘United Legend Ralph Milne dies’ was on their online sports page…. Milne did indeed die, but he was about as much as an Old Trafford legend as Colin Gibson… Milne was one of the worst and most mocked and derided players of the early Fergie era…. But just because Old Taggart signed the inept cunt some clueless not born then wanker automatically assumes that Ralphie was in the reds hall of fame with Keane, Cantona and Co….

    The free every morning Metro paper is admittedly shite…. But saying (like they did on Monday) that The Beatles played their last gig in 1969 on the roof of Abbey Road Studios?! For cunts sake… The last Beatles public performance (not a paying or free concert) was on the rooftop of their Apple Records offices in Saville Row… Even non-fans of the band know that one, and any sort of research will tell anybody that… But these cunts just can’t be arsed to do any…

    Now that sort of crap is commonplace in the Metro, but the NME -once a reputable music paper, and arguably ‘the’ music publication of the punk/new wave era – actually put on their online news site that George Harrison was the Beatles drummer… They also did a whole article online which kept referring to Stone Roses drummer Reni (Alan Wren) as ‘Remi’…. Everyone makes mistakes, but this is consistent amateur shit from supposedly highly paid professionals… Useless lazy cunts…

  12. The Mrs wants to go and see it, but I am already sick of this Star Wars bollocks….
    That Daisy Ridley would get a damn good chuffing, mind…

  13. Can’t cunt the internet .It works ok if you know how to use it. People actually got science degrees that really meant something before the internet was I understand that scantily clad young maidens may be seen in it’s darkest corners.

  14. The internet is the go to place when you need a cunt. It’s full of cunts, on many different levels, however, this doesn’t necessarily mean that the internet is a cunt per se.

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