Children in Need [2]

knitted rudolp

knitted chugger cunt


Is it too early to nominate Children in Africa – sorry – Children in Need for a cunting?

A night of ABBC cringe-worthy programming interspersed with famous cunts in Africa still following M’Tebe on his 8 mile walk to get a pail of water liberally mixed with bison piss only to walk back again.

“And it takes M’Tebe all day to do this. And the next day he sets off again. It’s a never ending battle just to get this most basic provision.”

Hey Ewan MacGregor, while you’re there, why not tell M’Tebe to move nearer to the fucking water? Oh, and while you’re on, instead of interviewing the hand-wringing mothers and their rotund bellied offspring, how about finding one of the papa-san’s who’s responsible for continually impregnating them? Oh, and don’t wait for the cunt to take off his AK-47 and dual bandoleros of 7.62 rifle rounds!

The ABBC will throw in the odd token local raspberry foundation story but – like Sir Cunt Geldof before them – the real story of the night is Africa.

It’s not that I’m unsympathetic to the plight of the starving millions in the dark continent, it’s just that after 40yrs and billions of pounds in worldwide aid, nothing has changed. Millions still starving, countries still run by tyrannical despots (who annex said monies/aid for themselves or to then sell it on to the peoples it was intended for in the first place), and the rich and famous still using it as a vehicle to signal how virtuous and caring they are, when the reality is that we all know they’re cunts at heart!

I used to be duped into giving to Pudsey and his clan but when I hit my 30’s I decided that the money would actually do more good in my own arse pocket because once the exec administrators have taken their cut, the aid facilitators taken their cut, the transporters taken their cut – only for the remainder to be annexed by the destinating Govt – poor old M’Tebe is lucky if there’s enough left to afford him an extra fly to go along with his 2 grains of rice and glass of bison piss!

Fuck off Children in Need!

And fuck off ABBC! If you’re that bothered about children, then please explain Savile? You cunts!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

114 thoughts on “Children in Need [2]

  1. Afreakans will continue to breed vigorously and unfettered. I predict in around 30 years time, we will see the world’s biggest ever humanitarian disaster on that continent.

    Overpopulation exacerbated by well-meaning but misguided aid relief, the deforestation, rampant diseases such as Ebola and Aids and insufficient wit of the race to support itself and survive these hardships will see deaths into the millions.

    And how will the stupid white man attempt to help? By throwing even more cash at the problem. Talk about tossing petrol on the fire.

  2. Africa has had a “checks and balances” system for government long before America evolved its Constitution. The country runs orn famine, disease and dictatorial regimes keeping a harmonious relationship between populations and food supply. Ebola was a missed opportunity but now they have a spot orf luck with the re-emergence orf the Black Death so long as the do-gooders keep the fuck oit. Last thing Africa needs is food aid and antibiotics. Spot orf rebalancing, that’s the ticket.

    • Cant out breed the food supply

      Shagging all day, not planting stuff and digging wells. going to end int tears

      • They spend more time digging to bury the dead but can’t dig wells too?, lazy cunts won’t go deeper than 5 feet.

  3. Not been on IsAC for a couple of days but funnily enough one of the blokes at work told me a cracker about “Children Indeed!” (his term).

    I cannot vouch for the truth of it but I hope it is. Now imagine a Brummie accent…

    —-

    There was this bloke Rob, he doesn’t work here anymore, but one year they made a real big thing of Children Indeed. It started in bloody September and after a week we were fed up but after 2 months we were fucking sick of it.

    One of the managers was going to wear a Pudsey suit on the day wheeling a bin around for money and that.

    So it came to the day and he was wheeling this fucking bin around with “Pudsey Appreciates Your Gift” on it.

    So when it came round first time I ignored him but Rob – who hated everything about it – put his hand straight in the bin. I was amazed.

    After about the 5th time of walking past I chucked a couple of quid in to get rid of the twat. Rob looked at me to say like, what you doing!?!

    I looked at him – well YOU put in!

    Anyway about an hour before closing the manager tipped out the bin to count how much HE’d raised.

    There was a small white thing in there with a ribbon and a tag which said: “For Pudsey x”.

    He took the ribbon off and when it unfurled it was a crape bandage with red spots drawn on it.

    Well it was a mixed of horror and laughter. Half weren’t amused and us normal ones were pissing it.

    Rob said to me: “I donated but it wasn’t money soft lad!”

    😃😃😃😃😃

  4. Anna Soubry is a fucking cunt.I am sick of seeing her shrivelled up old face that looks like an are repeatedly slapped by a cane.I always fear she will crack my screen when she is on it.She constantly slags off her own party to the extent that you wonder if she is a lib dem or labour plant.If you or I spoke about the companies we work for in such terms we would be fired in a day.She stood as a Tory party candidate who said we would leave the EU exactly 2 years after Article 50 at the last election and now you are voting against it.Again if I voided my contract I would be fired yet this cunt gets a free pass from the Tory party largely comprised of cowards who Maggie Thatcher or Enoch Powell would have eaten and shored out before breakfast.Like Enoch sour faced Beetlejuice Remainiac cunt Soubry who sounds like a Jennifer Saunders or Tracey Ullmann caricature should join a party is she fundamentally disagrees with Tory policy.I am convinced no one has ever done a cariacature of her as she is too extreme anyway.She is like the mother in law Les Dawson referred to.

    • #Shited not shored If someone could advise me how to turn this fucking spell checker off I will pay.

    • Most MPs irritate me but her Flabbot Jezbollah and McDonnell make me physically recoil whenever I hear or see them.

  5. Been told at work that I must refrain from raising my voice ever at work.Um yeah that ain’t gonna happen.I have a naturally loud deep booming voice and was always cast as older slightly menacing authority figures even at school.I mean I don’t go full Malcolm Tucker but on occasion raising my voice for a couple of seconds helps prevent me going full Malcolm Tucker.Anyway my old superior referred to someone as a fucking bell end the other week at the top of his lungs so I should be ok.Wasnt directed at me but some cunt who spilt hot coffee on him.It was hilarious.I had to go to the toilets to wheeze with laughter for 5 minutes.Also the coffee spilled is inherently a fucking bell end which made it funnier.

  6. I doff my hat to you RWAC gor a great cunting and you have covered many important points there.

    Here’s another bunch of wallet / purse plunderers who do most of their cash draining through kids at schools and usually fund raise at the same time as Children in Need etc.

    https://www.sciaf.org.uk

    The school headteachers choose one in order that parents don’t get robbed twice in one week and complain.

    SCIAF is choosen in order not to upset the parish peads. Money is robbed from the parents in exchange that their children are included in the “festivities”, for example, fancy dress or non uniform days among other con shit.

    These schools who have a strict uniform code any other fucking day of the week, makes an allowance if your child pays £1 to the charity.

    Now many of you won’t be aware who SCIAF are unless you read on the site but basically its the Catholic church.

    So tell me with all the money and expensive art propping up the Vatican, why is the pope any less of a cunt than Bono or Geldoff telling us to dig deep.

    Especially as children of all faiths “including Catholic” are in poverty in Great Britain. Charity begins at home.

    Wogan was also a right cunt charging the ABBC six figure fees every year to present this rinsing crock of shit which often includes repeat stories from previous years.

    • There used to be an offence “Obtaining by menaces” and in Scotland “Menaces”
      Charidee cunts use subtle subterfuge and coersion to obtain money, and attempt to “shame ” those who do not “give”
      Cunts

  7. “Cornwall Hugs Grenfell” BBC 0730 16/11

    FFS. A stupid bitch from Cornwall has and is raising funds to reward the gimmeegrants with a holiday in Cornwall to help ease their suffering!

    On the news, the advance scouting party is having fun on the beaches ( the sand causing great excitement ) and swarms of the little sandwogs are everywhere to be seen.

    Meanwhile, the obvious libmong with obvious green credentials is espousing the virtues of her venture, and giving support to her fellow “humanitarians” around the country to provide more relief.

    Personally, I would like to encourage and support “Baghdad hugs Grenfell! or even “Guantanamo hugs Grenfell”

    These stupid bitches believe they have the God given right to give our country over. Fuck em all. They were bad enough when they were hugging trees the feckless fuckers!

  8. WTF is it with this charity culture in the UK FFS! Just got into work this morning and that ginger cunt on ABBC radio 2 pushing the Children in Fucking Need agenda again! As if money isn’t hard enough to earn without the government taking their cut, and then expecting us to give it to these scrounging cunts!

    • A bit of a double Cunting here, I think…. as much as I avoid Radio 2 when that Ginger Cunt Evans , who seems to think that every one of his listeners has as much money as he has, is on ….there is also his ‘Charity Auction’ , which is nothing more than an almighty pissing competition …. fuck all to do with actually giving to charity, but more ‘Look at us, look at us …!’
      When folk that can well afford it donate to charity anonymously, then hat’s off to them …. but when Mr and Mrs Middle England bid an obscene amout of money for something like getting to watch a ‘celebrity’ take a shit …. then that’s the pinnacle of the Cuntfest that this is …. Cunts.

  9. Here’s the ’35 Year Old Sandwogs From The Calais Shitheap Masquerading As Chlidren In Need’ schedule….

    Bogtrotting bottybasher Norton squeaks and squeals…

    Slagette girlband like Little Knicks miming to their latest shite

    Appeal by snowflake celebricunt on behalf of transbender kiddies

    NeverEnders cast try to do ‘funny’ sketch (but still look like total cunts)

    More squeaks and squeals from Irish poove

    Appeal by uber celebrity bellend on behalf of Bogo-Bogo kiddies (who are infesting Rochdale or some other shithole)

    BBC newsreaders do cuntish song and dance number (for the umpteenth fucking time!)

    More popslag shite with Rita Oral

    Sir Henry Lenny is wheeled out (Right On Brutha!)

    Even more squeals and squeaks from Paddy Doughnut Puncher

    Appeal by super-rich celebritwat: telling us to ‘dig deep’f or Paki kiddies (who are in Bradford or some other turdheap)

    Smarmy Lineker does ‘zany’ football cuntfest with other cunts, P. Neville, Sinclair, Gorilla Keown etc

    Some hasbeen relic from yesteryear (Engelbert Cuntberdinck or Tom Jones)

    Bogtrotting poove squeaks and squeals again

    Appeal by Lily Suoermong on behalf of 35 year old kiddies (who are Pakis who are now a plague in Croydon)

    First ‘exclusive’ look at new Feminazi Lezza Doctor Who in pointless bollocks

    A short intermission: to openly dumb down men and slag off Brexit

    Appeal by celelbriscum on behalf of boy kiddies who want to be cunts and wear tiaras and feather boas

    Tribute to Saint Jo of the Blessed Cox

    Norton squeaks and squeals and does grand finale/count up

  10. Children in need can fuck off.

    Who knows how much money has been pumped into this bottomless pit. Hundreds of millions? Billions? What has the world still got plenty of, apparently? Yeah, children in fucking need.

    I never give to human charities anyway. There’s a billion of those of all shapes and sizes. Relatively few animal charities in comparison. So I only give to animal charities. The ASPCA to be specific. Cats rule. People, especially children, can fuck the hell off. Consumers of anything and everything. Producers of nothing useful. Cunts.

  11. That’s a major, well supported cunting. But forgive me if I’m wrong, one aspect of CiN wasn’t covered. It also makes funds available to UK projects such as – from personal knowledge – building an expensive playground for kids not one of whom was uncomfortably off, amid a wide-open rural area in which the said brats could never be seen playing as most of them spent their time becoming obese indoors. Needless to say, the elf’n’safety approved playground was barely used and its designer organic attractions quickly rotted.

    Need, in other words, is a flexible cuntcept, and if you succumb to the pathos of the dusky kiddy living on grass and baboon piss (thx, someone, for the image), your cash doesn’t necessarily go there, even after the suits who run the scam have paid themselves their exec salaries, the cunts.

  12. I hate this kind of begging shit so much but the main reason is that ugly ginger cunt we all hate so much Chris fucking retard Evans id gladly twat him with sharp object. he’s the most annoying wanker iv ever seen or heard. Everyone I know hates him so why is he still annoying everyone on the radio BBC tossers.

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