My girlfriend has a very annoying habit, We will go out for a meal and she will pick at my plate.
Now to clarify the situation, when I offer the menu and say “have what you like” I meen it, you are not restricted in price or volume as to what you may consume, However in return for this act of kindness by myself I expect my own food to go un molested.
I think that this is a fair arrangement, the fact that we occasionally exchange bodily fluids does not give you the right to nick my mushrooms (whilst saying” I really like mushrooms”) because these very same mushrooms were advertised on the menu that I provided you with earlier and said “have what you like”!
I order food that I like so that I may consume it, I in courage you to do the same and not stray on to my plate.
However, I do find this cunting rather difficult to pen due to my relationship with the culprit, but it’s a very annoying habit, please desist.
Nominated by: Lord Benny
12/11
Or anyone who ,when you say ‘any one want peanuts or crisps? ‘ when you are at the bar, shakes their head and then proceeds to eat yours. !
“I didn’t want a whole packet, just a crisp..” – you’ve smashed down half of them, you fucking gannet.
On which subject the crisp makers deserve a massive fucking cunting for the pathetic contents of their packets coupled with the ridiculous prices charged in bars. By weight it’s more expensive than gold!
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yes you would think they were saffron flavour the prices they charge.
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I don’t buy Walkers anymore, because of that jug eared BBC shithouse. But it definitely seems that crisp makers are now giving us half a packet of crisps, for the price of a full packet.
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Have you noticed the big eared cunt has been silent of late. Walkers had a word ?
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There was one cunt in my local who always moved over to speak to anyone with food and would nick a few chips as he said ‘hello’.
He’s a fucking narcissistic cunt too who would completely avoid you when confronted with the statement ‘Get your own food, you cunt!’
He saw himself as doing no wrong. He would smile and talk about something completely different to deviate from the fucking thieving he had just committed.
He’s still cunt to this day.
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“he’s still a cunt to this day” Once a cunt ,always a cunt. Maybe a teensy bit less cuntish but it’s like bumfuckers knobrot, it’s there to stay. I met a guy from college a few months ago ,he was a massive cunt then and at first I thought he was cured but then it turns out the cunt likes Corbyn, thinks the moon landing was all a sham and is a fucking vegan ,except for fish which magnifies his cuntishness.
Plus he drinks spritzers . Cunt.
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I believe they have been to the moon, but not that first trip.
There’s lots of theory’s about it, but for me it’s the lack of problems they encountered and the live TV footage sent back to NASA.
No dummy run,and everything went as planned.
Twenty years earlier they had dummy runs for the D-day landings, checking the sand quality etc, but then managed to broadcast landing on another planet.
Neil Armstrong(devout Christian) wouldn’t swear on a bible that they’d done it, and then ran away, and Buzz( I’m the biggest cocksucker to live) Aldrin punched a guy for asking if they had done it or not.
That sounds like two desperate liars to me………..
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I reckon if the moon landings were a hoax the Ruskies would have been all over it like a rash, but NASA have done themselves no favours with some wishy washy answers to some of the questions posed.
I’m sure to hoax such an iconic moment would throw up as many variables as attempting the real thing.
I’m no conspiracy type but there’s still a few points that fuel these conspiracies that need answering.
During the final descent of Apollo 11, Armstrong comments on the dust stirred up by the landing thruster yet not a speck on the modules feet or a crater of any kind below the lunar module.
The thrust generated by this (even in a lesser gravity) is estimated to be the equivalent of more than 1200 industrial leaf blowers yet nothing is disturbed below the module.
In two separate Apollo missions the terrain and hills in the background are identical, not similar, identical, and when negs are laid one over the other it’s conclusive although NASA claim they are hundreds of miles apart.
How the film stock used in the Hasselblad cameras survived intense solar radiation is questionable also.
Despite these and other questions with insufficient answers I still find it hard to believe it was hoaxed.
Either the whole program was brilliant execution by the human race at their scientific peak of the time or complete trajedy was averted by sheer luck.
Would the yanks have the front to fake it?….
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If you think anything like that could be kept secret you are very deluded. Just think of the hundreds that were involved at Nasa , impossible that something of that magnitude could ever be covered up and why take the chance of looking very stupid when someone takes the media shilling and reveals that everyone from the President down was fooled.
Unless they were all bribed, killed or held in a camp in the deepest jungle somewhere, along with Princess Diana and Harvey Oswald.
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@Trouserbulge
Can you read.
I stated more than once I don’t believe it was faked.
My point is the reasons why these conspiracies persist.
Apollo 11 was tracked constantly from launch to return to earth.
I think it was a brilliant achievement and as stated the Russians would have had a field day if proved otherwise.
Harder to fake than to a achieve was another point.
Read it again. Don’t call me deluded. Read it again…
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I’m sure it was me that was called deluded.
No worries, Beethoven had his critics too.
See if you can name three……….
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‘Once a cunt, always a cunt’
Dead right. He’s always was and always will be a cunt.
We never stayed in touch after we stopped going to the local (we all grew up and all that shit) until a special birthday (40th I think) where suddenly he invited a few of us to his b-day party. It was all about him and ‘look at me aren’t I the best fucking thing since ever’ attitude.
We cottoned on about five minutes into said party when, after going through the greeting formalities, he completely ignored us when we realised that we were just pawns to make up the numbers to make him look popular.
Real friends – fuck all.
Absolute cunt of the highest order. And he never got a round in either.
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Aldrin punched that cunt because he aggressively shouted “LIAR” right in his face. I thought it was a fucking good punch for an old geezer.
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I believe it was a Fake Moon landing. For starters No Stars coke bottle on ground, flag was fiercely blowing and all the astronauts are cunts
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Sometimes i hate a set of cunts collectively just coz i think they’re cunts, and astronauts are cunts.Smug, up their own arse cunts.
Wow, they’ve been shot into space.
My Da said i would have been shot into space if the Mater hadn’t jumped on.
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All mine are fucking pigs,I’m gonna put a padlock on the fucking fridge,I think that fucking cyril smithy caused a fucking famine,What a fat cunt he was.
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Russell Grant will be showing Lauren Harries his sausage,Pair of cunt they be,They knock a me a fucking sick their cunts.
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Just looked at pictures of Lauren Harries topless….put me right of my midday wank.
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I had to Google Lauren Harries.
Its that brainy little FREAK from years ago.
I heard he’d got the change, hol(e)y fuck. The cunts still got the same hair.
I’m not even slagging the little cunt off, he was great entertainment when i was a kid.
Brilliant, finding that little cunt again has made my day.
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It’s claiming to have shagged Russel Brand!!! Fucks sake,I take my hat off to Brand if he could manage to fuck that.
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Yeh Bird she/He fucks all the celebs,Sucks,Fucks,Rims,You name it will fuck her self with the leg of an antique chippendale chair for a few quid plus a small mention in the sun news paper,Russell Brand was fucking it.
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Dick,Russel Brand was using the fucker as a wheel barrow,God only knows what other things the pair were up ta.
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Only one way to deal with cunts who’ll risk robbing you when you’ve got a fork in your hand. You stab them in four places.
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Don’t know what the fuss is… I bear a passing resemblance to Gregg Wallace and enjoy,after a bellyfull of Guinness, barging into random gastropubs or bistros armed with a large spoon. I then charge from table to table,like a rutting boar, scooping up portions of the unfortunate diners food,while yelling about “lack of seasoning”, or “laaaveeerrrllly”.
The fact that I know fuck-all about fine dining helps convince people that I really am Gregg Walllace,as does the fact that I’m full-bore arsehole.
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Don’t forget the trademark Wallace ‘aggressive tie grab’ for the fellas and ‘alcohol induced leering’ at women for the authentic Greg Wallace impersonator look.
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