Package holidays


If you don’t want to be treated like a cunt, be in the company of cunts and give your hard earned to cunts then don’t go on package holidays.

Nominated by: Skidmark Eggfart

Package holidays are for complete and utter shit skids.

The chances of me paying my hard earned so I can be cattle ranched into a tin can charter flight and flown off to some dog shit infested crap hole where there’s even more slimy wops, kykes, dagos and fat limeys eating chips is zero point zero.

I went to Greece many years ago, it was full of cunts, the food was utter mong, the locals all criminals and the whole place stank of shit and piss.

No with all the added thieving, raping and lying trash that’s come in on rubber banana boats it must be actual fucking hell on earth.

Cunts all of them.

Nominated by: Spanky McSpank

21 thoughts on “Package holidays

  1. I took this cunting personally as my package seems to be on a long holiday or possibly early retirement. But no it’s not a reference to my spell in the desert but a cunting for package holidays.

    I have never been on one and don’t intend to start now. I don’t like people much especially the sort of cunt that gets themselves in debt or works like a demon to be packaged up and delivered to Johnny Foreigner for 10 days of exploitation.

  2. It must be about time for the police to organize their annual holiday to Portugal to look for Madeline McCann, (I’d suggest looking a lot closer to home). They seem to have exhausted the Ben Needham search,but I’d guess that new information will come to light next year,and off they can go again to redig the same ground that they’ve already searched..twice.

    • The McCann case is easier than Cluedo.

      It was the McCanns, in the bedroom with the tranquilisers.

      There you go. Solved it.

  3. My heart sinks when I see children, particularly babies, getting on the same flight as me. As a sociopath, I try to avoid anywhere that piss head Brits take their holidays. The thought of being on a flying scum shovel, with douchebag families and trashy stag and hen parties living the TOWIE dream, even for two hours would be the end of me. And when you get to your two star building site, you also have to put up with the worst that Europe can offer, and from what I hear, Russia.

    • You hear correctly. Latest scourge abroad are the Ruskies. Those cunts get everywhere. Verona 2 years ago. Fucking loud and uncouth. Just didn’t know how to act in restaurants etc.
      I am not a snob but these cunts take some getting used to if you have the time. My advice is if you are somewhere and the Reds turn up then fuck off.

  4. Package holidays are a real mixed bag I know from experience but you know whats a absolute cunt….. acne I just have a naturally oily face I guess I had a pimple on my chin last week that was as big as pam andersons mini sausage sized tit, I’ve been washing like bloody crazy wilting it down to size and watching my sugar and dairy consumption it gets better for awhile then comes back like a bitch in heat

    • Rub moisturiser into it to get the head to come out and then give the persistent little fucker a really good squeeze to clean out the pore.

      • I have had some bad experiences with popping I try to clean as best as I can after popping but it sometimes makes it worse. No worrys I’ll soon be old enough to not deal with acne in a couple of years

  5. particuarly to be avoided are downmarket package resorts in in islamic med crap holes like Turkey, Morocco, Tunisia and Egypt..where you will be constantly hassled by shopkeekers and pimps as “hello my friend”…..

  6. This is true. I made the mistake of going on a Thomson’s to Tunisia several years ago and got totally wanked out by the same weather-beaten local, hassling me every single day and trying to get me to buy his cheap handmade shit that I wasn’t even interested in.

    I might as well have walked around with a billboard with “I’m a Brit tourist…please cunt me” sprayed on it. I realise now that most package holidays in the end, are a big waste of money and time. Fucking nasty flights with screaming kids and the 18-to-diseased-cunt brigade and pissed-up revellers waking up in their own shit, isn’t my idea of a decent time. Plus I’m an antisocial cunt as well.

    Most of the women have that fake orange tan so bad, they’d blend in with a fucking garden centre fence-panel, and most of the young blokes are only after sporting a lovely diseased dripping cock. You can imagine it after their holiday is over. Straight off to the GUM clinic to get excavated like a Time Team dig. Fuck that. Who needs it. All this TOWIE bullshit has a lot to answer for. Not my brew of tea.

  7. Much as I despise package holidays and the scum who buy them, it is as nothing to the complete psychopathic loathing I hold for “travelers”. You know the type; all dreadlocks and friendship bracelets, baggy ethnic trousers and a few words of the local fucking gibberish. “Oh no, I’m not here on holiday, I’m traveling” No you are fucking not, you cunt. If you are in a foreign shit hole and don’t either live there full time or are there on business then you are on fucking holiday. Cunts.

    • I must concur.. I also believe “traveller” types to be the biggest bunch of fuck monkey cunts the world has ever seen. I somewhat recently had the misfortune to have a conversation with one of these fucking dick wad cunts. He spent about an hour babbling on about how he found inner peace in Machu Picchu and how mere mortals like me couldn’t begin to comprehend, he told me all about doing humanitarian work all over the Middle East for the “peaceful” cunts … I then told him all about my humanitarian work that I carried out in those same middle eastern areas with the British Army and he wasn’t impressed … don’t think I’ll speak to him again anyhow as I head butted the cunt …. fucking fanny!!!

  8. All aboit working the system me lovelies. You get what you complain for. Have been taking package breaks oit orf season for years. Demand special treatment for me infirmities and bitch for Blighty when I get there there. Had a delightful trip doine the waterways orf Kerala (South India cunts) with me oine cook wallah, me oine dhobi wallah and me oine boat wallahs virtually buckshee apart from a few measly tips for the wog fuckers at the end. Refused to take the first few shite holes they tried to put me in, made me presence felt and these Indian fuckers do like to please sahib. “Top hole co-operation isn’tit”. Top hole three weeks.
    Top tip. Do not try it orn the same package company twice in a row. Oh and collected some nice air miles as well.
    Top hole (but leave the fillies alone…unless you are that way inclined).

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