The invisible walkman is a condition that effects many cunts, they normally have an upright stance an a bemused expression on their face as they go through day to day life totally oblivious to their surroundings.
Prime example one of my neighbours who came home last night and reverse parked accross the back of my car which is in a parking space.
This is going to involve me having to pay them a visit and ask the embarrassed hubby to move the abandoned vehicle much to which he will comply yet again, and apologise.
Where as it would be a lot simpler to slap her round the head with a cricket bat and shout “wake up!”
Sad, but she is not the only one, I find them standing in shop doors looking inwards blocking the entrance, stationary in front of supermarket shelves, driving at you on the wrong side of the road and its not just women.
What is going on?
Nominated by: Lord Benny
Wheres Deadpool 41?
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I know perhaps Dio has his hands full or something? People and their stupid busy lives am I right?
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Oh I wasnt criticising.Just thought it was out of character.
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Its a long shot but maybe he has gone on holiday….
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He always mentions it.Also who is uploading the cuntings?
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this is what we have now,poeple from 30 downwards are socially retaaaaarded,you see the brain cant process anything unless they have an app on their phone to tell them what to do,or they think others will be interested if the post it on facecunt.E.G- I blocked a petrol station forecourt for 5 mins before starting my car and I don’t know why LOL,the only ones interested in cyba diariah are retarded younger cunts…..this is the so called better modern age. god help us all we are fucked….its safer now to be driven by a drunk than to let these cunts do anything that involves a decision without help………treble cyber cunts
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Today at the ripe old age of 41 i had my first look at fannybook,the missus was on it and i asked if i could have a look coz i really can’t comprehend the thing. Anyway the shit that greeted my eyes was fucking awful ,pictures of cute animals,dinners,cakes and fucking trees , and in amongst was all these lifestyle quotes. I know a number of you already knew this but seriously it was news to me .i have also never been on Twatter or wtf’s up. It may make me sound like a caveman but the Internet is for football music and porn ……and is a cunt…
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facebook is taylored to the viewer, My girlfriends face book, ditto,puppies,cakes flowers. mine military vehicles, bizare injuries, topless women and some rather nasty coments.
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Richard Branson is a evil cunt and a hypocritical bastard too His stance on open door policy is interesting given his great deal of wealth but for some reason can’t be bothered to adopt a few 20yr old migrant children. Is he a bigot punters?
Sir Branson spends much of his time on his own private island which he rents out to the super-wealthy elite. The 74-acre island has been a luxury retreat for the super-rich since 1984. “The isle can be privately hired for £33,000 a night. Sixty staff run the island, which is home to more than 200 flamingos”
Yes thats right cunters . .200 flamingos but not a single rapeugee anywhere. Do you know how many immigrants Branson could populate his island with?! So how bout you go bike riding with your new pals and PISS OFF you dog faced bellend! Also your internet service, your music label sucks and every musician thats been on it has been screwed over by you and dislikes you
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I’d like to give Gail Porter a cunting.
It’s not due to the fact that she’s bald,or the fact that she’s had a breast reduction operation. No,it’s because seeing her now and reading that she is 45, has brought it home to me that I am officially an OLD cunt. I always used to look at Gail and think that 5 years inside would be worth it for a night of,admittedly, un-natural sexual excesses. I’d pay the price.
Now I read the article, look at the pictures,and my first thought is….I wonder where she gets her wig?
So,my perky-titted ingenue, you are now officially safe from featuring in any more of my more lurid fantasies. You’ve just made an old man very unhappy. Cunt.
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To make you feel better perhaps you could manage a load on her bald pate, Dick, so she could massage it in and see if her hair grows back……..
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Unfortunately Alan , even my Gentlemens Relish doesn’t help with hair growth ,or my wanksock would look like one of the Hair Bear Bunch.
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It beats me how this sort of cunt gets through the day without serious injury, and it isn’t just youngsters glued to their “smart” phones either. Old biddies who get off the escalator and then just stand there while they make up their minds which way to go. You feel like shaking them by the shoulders and screaming at them to get a move on, but you don’t ‘cos its somebodies old mum or granny.
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Further proof humans are being replaced with pod people the cunts
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One of the reasons I dislike shopping and going to shops is the cunts who just stop in front of you without bothering to see if they are blocking anybody. Usually they have a phone in their hand looking down, oblivious to anybody or anything else in their immediate vicinity.
Why don’t we push them or beat them about the head ? cos we are polite and just step round them that’s why. Does that make us cunts ? Probably.
Can these wankers not deal with life unless earphones up and tapping away at all times.
Fucking annoying,ignorant cuntish cunts.
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I told a fat bitch on a bus once to change her settings to turn off the click noise whilst she was tapping out her text messages and sending me crackers. She looked at me stuck her nose in the air turned the other way and carried on. Too thick to figure it out. And the cunt youth playing his music through a crap, cheap, tinny phone. Oh, says I, my phone does that and let him have Jimi Hendrix in competition. Silence followed. Don’t use unwashed chav transport these days because I no longer work in the city centre thank fuck. I’m in Derbyshire now. A few chavs but virtually moslem free where I am. That won’t last long though.
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Saturday morning at the supermarket between 8.30 – 11.30 hours. Fucking torture, I have to be polite because I am of an age when “manners maketh man” and a clout round the head reinforced the mantra. So I wear a fixed grin and negotiate shelf blocker trolleys, milk watchers, have a family reunion in the cunting doorway, read all the papers, stand by the cig counter arse scratchers and all the other fuckwits that make living at the bottom of a disused coal mine seem a really good idea. Why do I always forget something on Friday so I have to run the cunty gauntlet Saturday maybe I am turning into a fucking milk watcher! Wife has key to gun cab and has my permission to shoot me if this is the case. May blessings rain on you all….
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My sympathies. I feel your pain. I was trying to negotiate an aisle in Tesco and some fat old bird was sat on a spaz trike the size of a police BMW. The fucking size of it was monstrous and clearly not safe to be over the threshold yet there she was blocking the light and every fucking thing else the useless fat cunt.
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Those cripple carts have to be so big because they are usually handed out to lazy fat cunts, whose hips can no longer handle the weight the fuckers have put on. So, the only exercise the flubbery fucks would have is avoided by the free use of a vehicle that costs the taxpayers more than my fucking car. Also, they seem to be riddled with an entitlement, if they run in to your legs, you get the look of “why didn’t you jump out of my way, can’t you see ME!” Well, i don’t have eyes in the back of my head, but maybe they have another mouth in the back of theirs, as it baffles me how they can get so fat with only one. Cunts.
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Ever get done by a “stopper”?
I.e. you’re walking along at the general pace and then the cunt immediately in front of you just stops (and usually to update a TwatBook status or something equally important)!
Colour me simple, colour me stupid, but – as I would in a car – if I wanted to check something or whatever I’d walk to the side of the walkway/aisle/etc. before stopping but no that’s too much effort with the hipster generation (useless, self absorbed, remoaning cunts).
However “stoppers” be warned, your nemesis the “absent minded buggy riders” are also out in force. These cunts swan about on the free buggies provided by large shops and shopping centres, and – because a lot of the users aren’t actually proper raspberries, just lazy twats – they have no idea how to control them, nor the concept of “looking where they’re driving”.
Yes “stoppers” you halt your ass immediately in front of an “absent minded buggy rider” and enjoy the seething pain as one, if not both, achilles tendons are whacked into by the ‘safety’ bumper (as a “peaceful stopper”, decked out in the full ayatollah gear, found to his cost in The Centre MK – I laughed at the cunt as he went down like a bag of spanners).
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I can’t remember the last time someone moved out of my way ,it always seems to be me ,old cunts,young cunts,little cunts,and they never say “ta” . sometimes the cunts even stare at you as if playing some kind of pedestrian chicken. I’m not the smallest cunt in the world but they always win coz I’ve got fucking manners, and i don’t really want to touch the cunts ….get a fucking clue….
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Somedays I am fucking invisible just wish I could use this talent to my advantage. Even my wife has mentioned that many people appear not to see me as I walk down the street or stroll around the shops. Must have a genetic stealth ability that only works when I am shopping or visiting the library. The other explanation is that the people who do not see me 5′ 11” 161/2 stone with stick are a bunch of cunty wankers who should return from dimension spaz and get out of my fucking way when I ask them politely to move for the third time. I know they are not deaf as they are having a spirited conversation about Andrews problems with his spleen or some such cuntfuckery. Why is half the population attempting to drive me madder than I all ready am? My brother came up with a possible solution as to why I am invisible for much of the time; he is such a wit. Hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil,obviously got my back.
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Some cunt walks in front of me , trips over a newsagents board and blames me ,the cunt. He was texting so I told him to fuck off or I will fuck him off. Complete wanker who was probably texting something important like “I am near the supermarket and it’s raining” ,boring little fat cunt .
People used to be useless empty headed cunts by themselves but now social meedja has joined them all up into one big swollen bag of useless cunts all saying useless cuntish things all day long.
A mate used to have one of those things which could fuck up phone reception in a train, massive fun to watch the cunts faces when they just get interference; I wonder if there is something which could scramble Arsebook and Shitter, leaving these sad wankers doing what they do best, staring into space.
Why are people so fucking stupid?
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