The Speel Chucker

'You have it easy. When I was your age, we didn't have spell checkers.'

The Spell checker is up for a well overdue cunting.

Whoever wrote the Algorithm(s) or programmed it obviously doesn’t use the word Cunt much so therefore must be a cunt.

I want to write Cunt it says Count, I want too write Cunting it says Cutting. Most of the time when your writing a cunting or reply you don’t bother checking everything and then when you read it after the spellcheck makes you the Cunter look a right can’t spell properly thick cunt. When your trying to accurately describe a cunt you don’t want to have to stop to check if the word you want to write is the word that is there, its ruins the flow.

So I think the Spellchecker is a count.

Nominated by : Black & White Cunt

21 thoughts on “The Speel Chucker

  1. I no some one who sent a letter with the intention of saying your account is not in order, it didn’t come out that way though, mind you they never paid on time so no major loss.

  2. I’ll go you one better. The fucking grammar checking feature in Word. There’s no fucking way I’m taking grammar tips from some pencil dick Yank who works for Microsoft of all places.

    At the point the Yanks actually spell and construct English sentences correctly, then I’ll pay attention. You wouldn’t believe the number of times I see “your” instead of “you’re” in pieces written by thick Yanks. They also have a habit of putting the word “also” at the end of a sentence. As in, “I’ll go to the store also” as opposed to “I’ll also go to the store” like an educated person would say. Cunts.

      • Wrestling IS real. Just not the shitty, television based American version. Even the American half of my family think it’s a massive pile of donkey shit.

      • It’s real in the sense it exists. Otherwise it’s a pile of old wank. WWE – I ask you. Could it be any more gay?

        Remember Big Daddy, Mick McManus and Giant Haystacks throwing each other around a ring on World of Sport on a Saturday afternoon? Hosted by the perpetually grinning Dickie Davis. Good times.

    • My mobile phones’ spell checker has learned all my curse words, so it offers them up even if I don’t need them. Which is great! I sent a text to my wife the other day that read “do you want to go to the cunting cinema tonight?” She found it hard to believe that my phone has Tourette’s.

    • In reality its a cunt in India or China, which is even worse. Or i guess a close second to a Septic.

  3. I’d like to nominate John O’Farrell for this steaming pile of wank in the Guardian.

    The gist of this “satirical” piece was that the issues surrounding the Referendum are so complicated (bless) that we should make our decision based on who is supporting each side. So because twats like Farage and Johnson support Leave, we should all vote Remain.

    Unfortunately for this unfunny spunk-bubble, this idea cuts both ways. Blair, Cumberbatch and Bonio all support Remain so all non-cunts should vote Leave.

    I know the definition of “racism” has been stretched beyond breaking point in the last couple of decades but I simply cannot see how one can be “racist” against a bureaucracy.

    Yanis Varoufakis (the Commie economist who was briefly finance minister of Greece last year) absolutely skewered the EU in his latest book.

    Varoufakis destroyed the EU cuntocrats for their arrogance, their corruption and, above all, for their incompetence. Hard to see Varoufakis as a racist Little Englander!

    Personally, I think the UK should stay in the EU but treat the rules in exactly the same way as the French and Germans do ie: ignore them if you don’t like them. If you don’t like an EU rule, don’t get your knickers in a fucking twist, ignore the fucker. And if the EU fines you, don’t pay the fucking fine.

    • Yep – typical Guardianista bullshit.
      Do these cunts ever have a serious bone in their entire bodies? Do they ever actually employ real journalists?

      Name five uses for The Guardian :
      (1) You can wrap your veg scrapings in it for the recycling bin
      (2) You can use it to light a fire
      (3) You could wipe your arse with it to save on bog roll
      (4) ….er…..

      That’s it.
      After all, you wouldn’t want to read it…

      • Some cunt guardian cunt journo was commenting on the verdict at the hillsborough inquest and he seemed to suggest that the demonisation of scousers was because of a few comedy sketches. What a cunt. What do you expect on radio fucking four…..

    • On a trip back to Blighty in 2014, I was mozying around the local Tesco and happened to walk past the newspaper and magazine area. Fuck me backwards with a barge pole, The Times is now the size of a tabloid and not the broadsheet it was when I emigrated. When did that happen and is it all tabloidy now? Was genuinely shocked.

  4. Get your capitals correct or you could be ”Helping your uncle jack off a horse”…Instead of ”Helping your uncle Jack off a horse”.

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