Amateur Dramatics deserves a good cunting.
Mrs Boaby’s Sister is a wanna be actor, actress or whatever the PC ‘term’ is these days. Her claim to fame is being an extra in some BBC period drama 12 years ago (I forget the name) which was filmed at Felbrigg Hall in Norfolk. You cannot even see her face and no-where is she credited apart from her own CV.
She is a member of the local ‘amateur dramatics society’ and last night I had to endure their performance of ‘Cat On A Hot Tin Roof’
For fuck sakes, it was fucking dire. The film was bad enough, but a cheap local ‘am-dram’ production made me want to rip my own arsehole out.
Amateur Dramatics, more like Amateur Traumatics
Nominated by: Boaby
George fuckin’ Osborne is a scare mongering,
Treasury analysis manipulating, shit suit wearing, bad haircut cunt.
Liz Truss MP is a pork market cunt.
0
Am-Dram? A sub genre orf Hell for any watching audience. Mainly a marriage mart for fat thighed Divas and chinless wonders. Over the years many an aspiring amateur thesp has attempted to inveigle the Great Yours Truly in to watching such a performance in some small God forsaken provincial fleapit. Always graciously assent me dears (the cunts like that) with the proviso that a sudden theatrical engagement may foil me attendance (you know this business me dears-they like that). Thus far the Good Lord has intervened on me behalf on each and every occasion.
Amateur theatricals a rich breeding groinde for the professional stage? Pull the other one Titus. Cannot recall any halfway decent thesp that has made it in to the profession that way. Certainly you may come across a few coarse cunts at the acting/asm level (acting/assistant stage manager). In short the lowest orf the low, Screw tighteners, stage floor washers ect with a fleeting non speaking appearance in a cast orf costume. Still manage to fuck up every scene they are in with their mugging which is at its worst when they know management is not in watching the show. Sneak in unannounced but fuck me blood pressure. Bastard cunts. Could quote much chapter and verse but let sleeping horrors lie.
Truly pissed orf by productions in the West End now that treat this crass bollocks as “comedy”. “The Show That Went Wrong” ect ect. Fucking Hell and Damnation. Still, as long as punters are prepared to pay hard earned to see such shite…….
1
This cunt bridged the gap between amateur and pro orf a sort. Legendary for his cheapskate productions in cheap theatres, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the late Charles Vance:
http://www.castingcallpro.com/uk/company/208/charles-vance-productions?page=1
0
I find professional dramatics generally unenjoyable too, being a bit of a vulgar cunt.
I accompany the missus to the theatre 2 or 3 times a year and, 2 or 3 times a year, find myself angrily wondering what the point of theatre is. I do quite like venomously detesting the other patrons and their chit-chat during the intervals though.
Haven’t had too much experience with amateur dramatics, did see one performance put on by a mate’s theatre class which, although terrible, was inadvertently comical. Makes me feel smugly superior, watching the untalented living out their delusions.
1
I can’t tell the fucking difference between shamateurs and professionals these days.
The Archers is blatantly guilty by spinning out an extraordinarily flimsy and incredulous Albert Square plot over the last two years. Why can’t they just get on with fooling, lambing and massive cider piss-ups? Oh no, nothing like a nice nuclear family going tits up for some hot gossip and look how many fucking do-gooders have crawled out of the woodwork since naughty Helen eviscerated the monstrous Rob.
The sooner they start fracking fuck out of Borselshitshire the better. Cunts
0
Thats because alot amateurs are catapulted to professionals merely cause they look beautiful or whatever reason. I actually prefer amateur actors to professional actors especially seeing how hollywood is dead.
A cheesy b- movie has more heart to it then those star studded mutli-million produced shite films from hollyweird. As for amateur theater the idea of it doesn’t always come to fruition because of budget restraint’s or source material but I’m seen a few decent theater plays. Even the professional theater can be a disappointment
0
My nearest neighbours, (appropriately nicknamed ‘George and Mildred’) are into Am-Dram in a big way. The missus and I were invited to one of their group’s productions a couple of years ago, An Inspector Calls. It convinced me that Amateur Dramatics should be renamed Amateur OVERdramatics. One or two of the performers could actually have passed for actors. But the rest of them couldn’t have acted scared convincingly if they were confronted by a starving lion.
The worst by far, was the leader of their group of ‘thespians’. Hugo, (I shit you not), a limp wristed luvvie, who looks, sounds and acts like Gordon Brittas. Mrs McGraw considers it a huge source of amusement that Gord…I mean…Hugo seems to have a crush on me. I find it incredibly uncomfortable. Were it not for the fact it would seem cruel to attack someone so camp, I would have punched him by now. Anyway, the guy cannot fucking act for toffee. Admirably though, he seems to know this, and doesn’t care.
0
If progressive actresses want to be referred to as Actors then they should get rid of all the Best Actress awards and make them compete with the men.But I guess they wouldn`t like an even playing field after all 😛
0
Have now more or less given up on theatre, apart from a good Ag Christie last year… also missed Bat on a Hot Tin Roof (wonder if it was the same minstrelcy that Boaby had to endure??).
Oddly enough, an Inspector is Calling locally, and fairly soon. I think I shall be out when he knocks…
More ham than at Lane’s Pork Butchers… (a most EXCELLENT purveyor of porky products, I should like to emphasise).
0
In defence of Am Dram, I used to go to Wokingham Theatre in Berks where the performances were particularly good. In fact, they’re a fucking sight better than the second rate ‘professional’ shite they put on where I live now.
Call me a sad bastard but we even took a weekend break back there to look up some old friends and take in a show…
0
No matter how dire they are they must be an improvement on the bbc mediocre output.
0