Daily Archives: February 9, 2016

Julie Walters

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I find it hard to believe, given she will be on at least one film at this time of year, that Julie Walters has failed to be Cunted.

I recall first coming across Walters in the 80’s when by some miracle she gained the lead in a couple of movies during the British Film revival. Due to not being spectacularly shite, though I could have smacked her in the face during “Educating Rita”, she seems to have become “National Treasure”.

There is nothing, from Victoria Wood, through Adrian Mole, to the Harry Potter franchise, that Julie Walters hasn’t made worse by her presence. Her overacting, screechy voice, hunched mannerisms make any scene she appears in painful to watch.

Julie Walters is proof positive that once you’re in with the in crowd in the nepotistic puddle that is British acting talent, you are made for life.

And who picked her to play Cynthia Payne? If you turned up at a brothel and Julie was on offer, you’d have a tug at home instead.

Nominated by: Cato

The alpha male

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Just been to visit my nephew and his wife and kids. This isn’t showing much family loyalty but I’m sorry to have to report he is actually a flash cunt.

Firstly to quote ‘You know how I paid for this watch ?’ Me- ‘no’. Him £15,000′. I think this was supposed to impress. Dear oh dear.

Then he starts telling me about his job. He is ‘something in sales’. He tells me how he spends all day getting people to buy services they don’t really need and how this boosts his commission. ‘I’m on £80,000 atm should be up to £100,000 next year.’

To cap it all we then go for a drive in his executive motor. Fuck me! You know those knob heads who tail gate? That’s him. He actually said ‘Oi little man in your little car get out my way’ whilst flashing his lights and bibbing his hooter. He also took great delight in over taking cars as close as possible and I mean about 2 inches. All this with his 2 kids in the back.

I told him he was driving like a cunt only to be told ‘ I know what I’m doing.’ A prime example of the ’alpha male’.

Nominated by: Ozmandias