The McDonald’s Christmas Ad

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Speaking of Christmas adverts, that fucking McDonalds advert. Jesus Christ! What a family of irritating cunts.

“Dad, why are you so grumpy?!” squeals one of little shits in the back of the car. If that was me I would pull the car over, grip the wheel tighter than my Mrs’ arsehole and calmly explain ” I’m grumpy because I’ve created the worst domestic unit known to man. You shits and your mother are such a disappointment to me that I’ve been spending most of my evenings indulging in smack and having sex with the local street walkers. I hate every fiber of your beings”.

I would then systematically shoot each one of them in the face. Leaving that fucking little fuck pig-boy till last so I could see the despair that the child locks had put onto his chubby shitty face, then delicately kiss him on the forehead and whisper in his ear “Like Wizard do you, you camp cunt?”, then put the twats brains over the back window.

Well, that would be what I would do anyway. Merry Christmas.

Nominated by: Cunt O’MaCunto

21 thoughts on “The McDonald’s Christmas Ad

  1. It’s probably why he is taking them to mac’a’d , kill the fucks off legaly so he can get a real life.

  2. The BBC should do something useful and bring back ‘The Grumpy Guide to Christmas’. Now there was a Christmas show worth watching (and I still do).

    Mind you if they did it now there would no Will Self and Ozzy Osbourne… we’d probably get mongs like Joey Essex and Claudia Wank-a-man.

  3. Now that was a fucking advert! Brought a tear to me eye, fucking great stuff.

    I had one of those MB Logic’s, probably still have it somewhere, seem to remember tricking it by fucking around with a button sequence into always get the answer and getting to winner tune, but I haven’t still got the original box though, cunt!

  4. just been to visit my nephew and his wife and kids.this isnt showing much family loyalty but i;m sorry to have to report he is actually a cunt.firstly to quote ‘you know how i paid for this watch ?’ me- ‘no’..him £15,000′. i think this was supposed to impress. dear or dear. then he starts telling me about his job. he is something in ‘sales’. he tells me how he spends all day getting people to buy services they don’t really need and how this boosts his commission. ‘i’m on £80,000 atm should be up to £100,000 next year.’
    to cap it all we then go for a drive in his executive motor. fuck me.you know those knob heads who tail gate, thats him. he actually said ‘oi little man in your little car get out my way whilst flashing his lights and bibbing his hooter. he also took great delight in over taking cars as close as possible and i mean about 2 inches. all this with his 2 kids in the back.. i told him he was driving like a cunt only to be told ‘ i know what i’m doing.’ a prime example of the’alpha male’.

    • I have a fake Rolex Cellini that I got for £50 from a bloke in China.
      I saw a real one in a shop on the waterfront in Cape Town selling for £26,000
      I showed it a mate of mine who is a watchmaker. He couldn’t tell it was a fake.

      Anyone who pays that much for watch is a cunt!

      • Dio, unless it was just a cursory glance your friend the watchmaker has either been lying to you all these years and is actually binman or he’s a watchmaker that has very little experience with Rolexes. As good as some of these fakes are there are always details that give them away, or they would be real Rolexes.

        Price-wise for a watch is just a matter of perspective, the same thing could be said about expensive holidays/cars etc etc being a waste of money, the heart wants what the heart wants and if someone wants to dump £15k on a watch I say crack on.

        Ozymandias your nephew does sound like a cunt, it’s one thing to have nice things but it is quite low rent to boast about it and driving like a dangerous cunt with his kids in the car would have earned him a quiet word by the scruff of his neck if that was my nephew 😉

        • Apparently, if you shine a light along the rim of the glass, it’s micro engraved ‘Rolex’ and that is then projected onto the face by the light. Not a lot of people know that…

          Of course, mine say ‘Genexe’ instead of ‘Geneve’ on the front which is a bit of a giveaway. I have a Longines (genuine) which I’ve now had for 24 years. It’s a lovely watch. Cost £400 at the time, now about £2,500. I had it refurbished a couple of years back for around £180 so it looks like new. I bought the fake Rolex for while it was being done. Now I take the cheapo on holiday so of they want to mug me, they can have it!!!

          • Don’t get me started on vintage watches or we’ll be here all day. I love vintage watches and have a few myself, I don’t have a Longines as of yet but it is on my list to add to my collection. Bahhhhh modern fucking watches, for the most part no character as far as i’m concerned.

            That’s a good idea about bringing the dud on holiday in case you get mugged, if the mugger knows his watches he might feel sorry for you and bung you a few quid back 😉

      • I have a mate who owns a Rolex automatic which he never wears due to fears of being mugged for it.

        He bought an exact copy in Thailand with a quartz movement for £20 that actually keeps better time.

        • I wear mine on nights out, special occasions, no point in having it just not to wear it, mine keeps perfect time.

        • Where the fuck did watched come into this its about mcfucknolds you utter wayward tangent cunts

    • Sounds like he has quiet low self-esteem.
      Never mind, he’ll very likely meet a real ‘Alpha male’ some day soon and have his arse handed to him.

      • £80,000 a year and spending £15,000 on a watch tells me

        (a) he’s living beyond his means
        (2) his priorities are all wrong.

        Makes me think of people who live in rented / council houses and own two 5 series BMWs. Family first – food on table, roof over head, clothes on back. These are the sort of arseholes who complain they can’t afford to buy a house and save for a pension. You can’t have these things if you keep pissing money up the wall…

  5. A lot of these old ad’s seem like a nostalgic who’s who of operation yewtree fuckers! I have watched a few on you tube and some of them appear, typical of them to be around things that are kiddie related.

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