The iWatch

iWatch

What the fuck? With all the resources the cunts at Apple are supposed to have they produce something used by Dick Tracey in the 70s.

And what of the useless cunts camping out to say they are the first to have one. As most of these cunts dont look like they have seen a shower and soap for about 6 weeks no doubt the last millions Apple fondled on this latest invention was paid for these cunts to camp outside.

Surely no right minded individual would do so at unless they were paid royally?

Nominated by: King Cunt

The cunts who camp outside a shop overnight for a fucking iWatch are total bellends… I remember in the 90s that HMV (overpriced cunts) opened their store on Market Street, Manchester (said HMV is now closed. Oh dear. How sad. Never mind.) so people could by the new Oasis album (What’s The Story? Load Of Bollocks) at midnight. Anyone who goes into Mcr City Centre at midnight is fucking mad to start with. But to que up for a crap album, a Harry Potter book, or a bloody watch?! There are some real wankers out there…

As for the Apple iWatch, what sort of knob would wear that? I couldn’t go into my local Moston boozer with that on and live it down. Even though I can afford one I would never buy one…. It’s flash, it’s poncey, and the almost religious zeal that meets every new Apple product is sickening…

Nominated by: Norman

( Posted from my Apple MacBook Pro. Ed.)

7 thoughts on “The iWatch

  1. My boss has just bought one, he’s walking about with his sleeve up to show it off. What a fucking bellend. I’m not a violent man but I have an overwellming urge to kick him in the balls.

  2. I’m going to wear one on my cock to fuck Anna Eagle straight.

    With a iWatch on my cock she’ll be moaning in her 5-year-old girl voice better than when she’s being fisted up the arse by that unholy rat-faced mental cunt, Maria Exall.

  3. Do believe I have spotted an entrepreneurial opportunity. Allow me to present the “Sir Limply Cock Cam”. This state orf the art 12 megapixel colour device attaches via a genuine gold plated cock ring on the tip orf the old horseprong and due to its multi function head imparts a pleasurable sensation to the filly whilst recording the act for viewing later on any widescreen TV.

    The Cock Cam has outstanding Bluetooth ™ functionality and readily handshakes with any compatible device allowing the Sportsman to preview his performance on most handheld screens. Uncircumsized cock may restrict viewing angles in certain circumstances but Gristle is working on that.

    Particularly recommended for the inexperienced punter and for those orf a perverted disposition.

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